Thanks for this thread. I'm hoping to get started back on walking routine. I leave the house around 7:30 and don't get home until about 5:30, and so it's barely light when I leave and barely light when I get home. And I can't walk in our neighborhood. It's way, way too dark. There's one street light in the corner of the cul-de-sac by our house, one on the corner about 1/3 mile down the road and another at the end of the of the cul-de-sac. So it's extremely dark, plus it's DFW. I wouldn't risk walking at night.
I do some walking in place or up and down our stairs at home, so that helps a little. But I also don't have any support. Whenever I walk and get sweaty, my DW is upset because then I have to shower and waste water. If I walk outside, she says I stink so bad I shouldn't even be allowed inside. So no moral support on walking, and that leads me to not want to do it. I need to, though, as I'm 50 (DW is 43) and both of are sedentary for the most part.
So thank you for creating this. Hopefully I can get some steps in. Sometimes I will go to
Walmart on my lunch break and just walk up and down the aisles to get some steps in.
First off...WELCOME!!! I am also in TX, but a little farther south. I'm on the northern side of the Houston area. I periodically find myself driving through your neck of the woods because DD19 is attending the University of Oklahoma. So, DFW is on the way to Norman. DD17 also sometimes has softball tournaments in the area.
Hopefully, we can help give you some support. While not an identical situation, DH has not been the best when it's come to my health and fitness. I'm a little older than you (52) and he is almost 55. While I'm a proverbial yo-yo and have had my ups and downs, I was pretty much sedentary and eating horribly before November 2024 (last was really healthy in early 2020). I had some health issues that were made far worse because of my escalating weight, had several instances where I required a seatbelt extender on planes, I am pretty sure my weight ripped one of our folding outdoor chairs, etc. I was carrying so much weight that it was causing parts of my body to get pins and needles if I turned to my side for too long in the night while sleeping. The weight was also causing me to wheeze and snore because of the pressure on my respiratory system. Even walking for a bit was painful because it was becoming too much for my feet. The chaffing I experienced was horrible. I wasn't obese to the extent of the people profiled on tv shows, but it definitely was too much for my body. I don't know what it was but I woke up one morning at the beginning of November and said "all of those things didn't kill you and this is no way to live." I started small and just keep building and adapting as my journey shifts. As of right now, I'm down 145 pounds since that November day where I decided ENOUGH.
I can also sort of relate to your struggles with your DW. Mind you, my issues with DH are a bit different, but I realized that he just wasn't going to be motivated and active enough to be my partner in this journey. I just was not expecting him to be so negative as I started having success. He periodically goes to the gym, but most of the time, he's sedentary and his nutrition could use a considerable amount of help. For me, I am repeatedly told by him that I am no longer any fun. I am always hearing that he preferred the old me...even though the old me was in pain, both physically and mentally. He even tried to argue that multiple doctors were wrong and that some of my prior health issues were not exacerbated by my weight. Side note, DH is not a doctor or even in the medical field. That's not to say there isn't still mental pain, but it's different and I feel much more empowered. I've been accused of this all being about vanity. Sure, I love that most of my clothes now are super tiny. I went from having trouble finding clothes that were flattering and fit my large frame to having problems finding super small things to fit my shrunken form. And yes, there are people in my mix...many of which don't really know me...who stop me to ask about my transformation. It's everything from some of the really fit people at the gym wanting to give me kudos to people in the neighborhood that see me consistently walking and are looking to me for inspiration. Maybe this is also vanity...but I like people seeing that I've made so much progress, I like really healthy looking people considering me a success. Oh, and I love that I've become an inspiration to people looking for a kick start. So, I guess maybe I am a bit vain...but in really good ways.
In any event, I am no expert, but I am proof that you can't let a spouse sabotage your health. Showering is not wasting water. I may be a bit too smart mouthed for my own good, but if that's her argument, I'd counter by saying that it's still a heck of a lot cheaper than the cost of medical care for all of the health issues attributed to a sedentary lifestyle. I will gladly share the price tag of some of my cancer related complications attributed to my high weight, or the wound on my heel that wouldn't heal because my high weight was limiting my circulation to extremities, or even the extra testing my one doctor kept prescribing because she was fearful I was pre-diabetic. I wasn't, but again...more costs because I was in such poor health. I could go on, but I'll just say I could buy a new car with that money.
Oh, and I don't want you walking in unsafe conditions, but if going in the dark is feasible...there are some previous posts talking about things some of us use to walk at night or in the early morning. I also have suggestions on other ways to get steps in that might help. As I've noted, I am a morning walker...usually heading out around 6am, but willing to go earlier if situations require an earlier start. I have the luxury of trails (that I'm not supposed to be on in the dark...but everyone does it) but I also cover some parts on the street.
