~ The Man Report ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Imminent Shutdown ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

[jcc0621]

As far as Buzz, I nearly killed him Christmas Eve. He's lucky he's still living. More to come later...

 

[cmp1111]

I'm sure this is gonna be good...

 

[dismorgh]

As far as Buzz, I nearly killed him Christmas Eve. He's lucky he's still living. More to come later...

Do you need help holding him down?

 

[winkers]

Ok, what did Buzz do???

 

[Linnie The Pooh]

Ok, here's how it went down. Remember we live in a house that is a year and a half old. I work around the clock cleaning it as it is pretty big. I like it to look nice so it's my "thing." You can always find me cleaning or polishing something. I kind of enjoy it. But I don't need any more work.

Buzz is notorious for slopping, spilling, just mucking things up in general. Saturday night, we're eating dinner and he spills on his shirt and begs me to hit it with the Wine Away. So I stop my dinner and work to get the stain out.

Sunday night, we're eating dinner and he spills on his shirt and begs me to hit it with the Wine Away. So I stop my dinner and work to get the stain out. Wine Away works for everything-not just wine.

Then later, we're watching t.v. and crash, splash, "Oops!! Lin!!! Help!!" We have these cup holders built into the couch. He knocked his glass of wine over, out of the cup holder and it's everywhere. There's a pattern here....

So Monday night. It's Christmas Eve. The kids are in bed, sleeping away, waiting for Santa. We're staying up too late, sharing some wine, enjoying the quiet. We watch one too many t.v. shows and I suggest we hit the sack. Got a big day the next day.

I start loading stuff up to carry upstairs-our snacks, my wine glass, etc. My hands are totally full so I ask Buz to get the wine bottle that we didn't finish. Now you know where this is going. He gripes about it, but I ignore him. I zip up the stairs, not knowing or realizing I've left a bumbling, stumbling buffoon in my wake. He yells out, "I got too much stuff." I start to walk towards him to help him, and he yells out, all slurry, "I'm falling down, I'm falling down!!!"

Crash. Wine everywhere all over the stairs and wall. I was soooo irritated, not just b/c he spilled, but the past few days I've been cleaning up his spills!!

I snap at him to just give me the stuff he's carrying and I put it on the counter, then I grab the Wine Away again and some rags again. I start working on the spillage, while Buzz stands there asking, "What can I do?" Remember that old cartoon where the big bear creature wants a kitten (or some small animal) and he says, "He'll love it and hug it and pet it." That's what Buzz was sounding like. All dopey, drunk and dumb.

"What can I do???"
"Just go to bed."
"Aw, don't be mad at me Lin."
"Too late."
"What can I do?" I look up at him and he's got this goofy grin on his face, and has somehow managed to get one of his teeth to show, but only one.
"Just go to bed."

I got most of it cleaned up, but I did notice 4 little spots this morning that I missed so I got that up. Repainted the wall and all appears to be back to normal.

That night, though, I woke up in the middle of the night and Buzz was holding my hand! Must've felt guilty. He's such a joy.... This was the 883rd time I wanted to seriously hurt him in 14 years!!

 

[GeminiAngel]

I would have killed him in his sleep.

You Hoo Buzz, Wife does not = MAID!

 

[winkers]

poor Linnie! There's a special spot in Heaven reserved for saints like you! I think it even comes with padded stain proof walls!

Maybe you should make Buzz drink his wine from a sippy cup! The kind that doesnt' spill if it's knocked over or shaken upside down!

 

[carrieannie]

Buzz is notorious for slopping, spilling, just mucking things up in general. Saturday night, we're eating dinner and he spills on his shirt and begs me to hit it with the Wine Away. So I stop my dinner and work to get the stain out.

Sunday night, we're eating dinner and he spills on his shirt and begs me to hit it with the Wine Away. So I stop my dinner and work to get the stain out. Wine Away works for everything-not just wine.

Then later, we're watching t.v. and crash, splash, "Oops!! Lin!!! Help!!" We have these cup holders built into the couch. He knocked his glass of wine over, out of the cup holder and it's everywhere. There's a pattern here
OH BOY! You deserve a medal Linnie! Why cant Buzz clean himself up? Just wonderin,,,,

So Monday night. It's Christmas Eve. The kids are in bed, sleeping away, waiting for Santa. We're staying up too late, sharing some wine, enjoying the quiet. We watch one too many t.v. shows and I suggest we hit the sack. Got a big day the next day.

OOH LA-LA,,This sounded like it was going be a great christmas eve afterall!

I start loading stuff up to carry upstairs-our snacks, my wine glass, etc. My hands are totally full so I ask Buz to get the wine bottle that we didn't finish. Now you know where this is going. He gripes about it, but I ignore him. I zip up the stairs, not knowing or realizing I've left a bumbling, stumbling buffoon in my wake. He yells out, "I got too much stuff." I start to walk towards him to help him, and he yells out, all slurry, "I'm falling down, I'm falling down!!!"

I wish you had a camera with you!

Crash. Wine everywhere all over the stairs and wall. I was soooo irritated, not just b/c he spilled, but the past few days I've been cleaning up his spills!!

I snap at him to just give me the stuff he's carrying and I put it on the counter, then I grab the Wine Away again and some rags again. I start working on the spillage, while Buzz stands there asking, "What can I do?" Remember that old cartoon where the big bear creature wants a kitten (or some small animal) and he says, "He'll love it and hug it and pet it." That's what Buzz was sounding like. All dopey, drunk and dumb.

Two words,,,,two trips!!!
"What can I do???"
"Just go to bed."
"Aw, don't be mad at me Lin."
"Too late."
"What can I do?" I look up at him and he's got this goofy grin on his face, and has somehow managed to get one of his teeth to show, but only one.
"Just go to bed."

AWWWW.... OR,,,,,

I got most of it cleaned up, but I did notice 4 little spots this morning that I missed so I got that up. Repainted the wall and all appears to be back to normal.

you had to actually repaint the wall?!!!

That night, though, I woke up in the middle of the night and Buzz was holding my hand!

theres sweetness in there somwhere!

Must've felt guilty. He's such a joy.... This was the 883rd time I wanted to seriously hurt him in 14 years!!

 

[FauntleroyFAN07]

I am guessing that the wine away was purchased for the sole use of buzzs messes.

 

[HomeschoolMama]

That's priceless. In my head it was hilarious even though I know it would have pi$$ed me off too. I called DH to read it to him and he thought I was crazy for laughing so hard at "I'm falling down. I'm falling down!"
I just texted him that very line. I'm falling down, I'm falling down!
Thanks for giving me something to laugh about. I just packed for 2 of the 5 of us, and I was starting to have steam coming out of my ears. Hopefully the boys will be easier to pack for! Now I'm a little more chill.

 

[Linnie The Pooh]

I should add that the way he was talking was hilarious on its own-he was slurry, but really stretching out the vowels and enunciating. he does that when he's trying to appear sober.

"Awwww dooooon't beeee maaaad aaaat meeee Liiiiiiin"

"Whaaaat caaaaan IIII doooooo?"

You get the picture.

The reason he can't clean up after himself is he just can't do it. He's even more of a menace trying to clean things up-it's just easier and better to do it myself. If I let him do it, it's more work for me.

He's ruined tons of stuff by trying to clean up or do things on his own.

One time he was trying to cut up a credit card and I look over (this was like 10 years ago or more) and he's got my GOOD scissors!!! My mom gave them to me and they were a lot of money. I about had a heart attack. See, it's stuff like that-just easier to do it myself. Keeps the house running like a well oiled maching vs. a Buzz catastrophe.

 

[ILMICKEY]

I've alway said that men don't marry us to be wives, we become surrogate mothers.
Marrying us is just a front.

You're a good woman Linnie!! You should see my house because I refuse to clean up after my husband. I'm just stubborn like that.

 

[Montana Disney Fan]

Uh... oops!


Let's change the subject, shall we??

How 'bout a new trippy!?!

Coming up! ~ Gurgling Tummies & Duct Tape ~

 

[HomeschoolMama]

Yeah, that'll work for me!!!! Of course, I'm off to have Girls Night Out, but I'll be back.

 

[jcc0621]

Buzz is notorious for slopping, spilling, just mucking things up in general. Saturday night, we're eating dinner and he spills on his shirt and begs me to hit it with the Wine Away. So I stop my dinner and work to get the stain out.

Sunday night, we're eating dinner and he spills on his shirt and begs me to hit it with the Wine Away. So I stop my dinner and work to get the stain out. Wine Away works for everything-not just wine.

What is wine away

There's a pattern here....

Yes, yes there seems to be

He yells out, "I got too much stuff." I start to walk towards him to help him, and he yells out, all slurry, "I'm falling down, I'm falling down!!!"

Not funny as the time I am sure but in my mind it is

Crash. Wine everywhere all over the stairs and wall. I was soooo irritated, not just b/c he spilled, but the past few days I've been cleaning up his spills!!

Oh no

"What can I do???"
"Just go to bed."
"Aw, don't be mad at me Lin."
"Too late."
"What can I do?" I look up at him and he's got this goofy grin on his face, and has somehow managed to get one of his teeth to show, but only one.
"Just go to bed."

Note to men, just do what you are told

That night, though, I woke up in the middle of the night and Buzz was holding my hand! Must've felt guilty.

Awww, it was his way of apoligizing

Uh... oops!


Let's change the subject, shall we??

How 'bout a new trippy!?!

Coming up! ~ Gurgling Tummies & Duct Tape ~

Nice try, you know you are going to get ripped aout this, but we will next the next installment too LY/MI

 

[Montana Disney Fan]

Janet! I thought we all agreed to drop it and change the subject?!?

 

[jcc0621]

Noooooooooooooo, I think you agreed to it, but I will if you get the next installment up

 

[winkers]

I thought we all agreed to drop it and change the subject?!?

For some chocolate and a Dr. Pepper, I'll forget anything!

 

[jcc0621]

For some chocolate and a Dr. Pepper, I'll forget anything!

 

[GeminiAngel]

I am guessing that the wine away was purchased for the sole use of buzzs messes.

Maybe it was created with him in mind!