Telling others NO!!

[Dean]

We can't tell you what to do, but sounds like it's time to settle this. The main problem you face is not your FIL, it's your spouse. Unfortunately, you're set up to look bad no matter what happens. Regardless, it will only get worst as time goes along. Your mission is to first settle it with your husband then with your FIL. Regardless, I suspect that you will not be done with this until you either get an absolutely agreement giving you total and final control of the 50 add on points or you sell them.

I suspect your FIL had no intention of paying any on this, it was likely his way of getting you to subsidise trips by himself and other members of his family. I wonder if he views your family as the prosperous ones and is doing his part to redistribute the wealth.

 

[FreeTime]

Actually Dean I think that the problem is that everyone else in the family takes advantage of him and it makes me so very, very mad that he stuck me with paying for his 100 points. For example he has paid for numerous trips to DW for my BIL family, has caught their bills up time and time again, and pays for another family members bills. He and my husband will be out and my husband will ask him for $10 for gas just until he gets home, and you would have thought that he asked for $1M! I have to give the man credit, he has helped us by loaning us a down payment for our house, which he would always ask when he would get it. We pay him back, but the rest of the family uses him more and more. But, of course, how could we tell him that? Maybe I am jealous because everyone else has learned how to take advantage of the poor man! I am dreading going on vacation with him in May and now I am dreading him going again in the fall. So much for me enjoying making plans with my DVC!

 

[Dean]

I stand by original interpretation. Sounds like he's bent on giving you guys nothing and paying for others in the family, partly at your expense. While you shouldn't expect any freebies, you should not be expected to donate unless you truly want to. Still, the main problem is that your spouse hasn't taken a stand and then that puts you in the middle being the heavy. Still seems like tranferring the points directly to him, declaring them yours forever or selling them will get you out of this specific predicament. You could also deduct the payments from what you owe him. The real problem though will not go away unless your husband takes a stand.

I know 2 families much like you describe. One is my Wife's where they never gave her anything except the bare necessities and then gave her younger brother money, cars, etc. They'd send him money to pay his car payment and he'd use it to go on vacation. He must have wrecked 4 or 5 cars and always wanted another one from them. She never asked or wanted anything from them but it really pissed her off to see her parents taken advantage of that way. I think it also made her feel a little less loved than she would have otherwise. The other family is my BIL's. His family would give him nothing if he asked and are always giving to his 2 sisters and his brother. Again, they take advantage of his parents and spend the money's frivilously.

 

[Granny]

FreeTime....I can't really offer any better advice than you've already been given. My guess is that this DVC issue is not the only thing that is causing friction.

I only post to give you some moral support and to let you know that we are all pulling for you.

We wish you all the best.

 

[prplcrzy]

Freetime,

I would tell him you have to sell the points cause you can't afford it, and if he doesn't pony up the money for dues each year, tell him you sold them and had to use the money from the sale to cover the back dues that you owed. Then just enjoy your DVC and he won't feel like you owe him something.