Suddenly Single

[mamaloya]

Well, he was a battalion level chaplain, so all involved are over that level. I have someone with much pull (I don't want to post who out of respect for him) who is watching and waiting. He does not want to jump in until after I have tried thru the normal channels. He is poised and ready to pull many strings for me, he just wants to save it that way we don't waste it. Does that make sense? It is kind of like saving the big guns.

My first thought on the press was "he will get in trouble". I am slow. I can't bring the press in because of what is at the core of this issue. We have to keep this private.

I will be calling the CID agent in charge of this case tomorrow. She is turning out to be my biggest advocate. She stood up to OCS for me and she has given me her cell number to have if I need anything. She is the one pushing to keep him over there and not bringing him back until the trial. I may call her today as it looks like the storm was nothing here. I think everything is still closed today though. School is out today and tomorrow, not sure about post operations.

I am glad that Gustav came as it delayed his return because no one told me he was coming back this week. I was told that I would be given notice before he was brought back. I am little angry about the lack of information. I also found out that a friend knew and did not tell me because she knew that I would flip out. HELLO!!!! I have reason. I NEED to know these things.

You guys are really wonderful. I must repeat that it is great to get these things off my chest. Thanks for being a sounding board.

 

[BigDaddyRog]

May God have your back covered, and Im sure he will...Im fairly certain he gets REALLY pissed when someone uses his name as bait, and carries his book as a disguise...he's not a big fan of those who prey on others seeking devine guidance.

 

[ntsammy5]

I've only dealt closely with CID once - I found them to be pretty competent.

People ar always surprised about UCMJ - it sometimes doesn't make sense, but it's not civilian justice - ---

My wife works with CPS in NY and I can imagine whet you're going through with them - I hope the military decides to keep him confined for your sake.


BTW - UCMJ = Uniform Code of Military Justice

 

[mamaloya]

Yeah Al, I do the right thing and they go after me. It is crazy. I am glad that I have the CID on my side. They really got them to back off. I guess when the SW got phone calls from a Colonel, a Special Agent, a chaplain, a SgtMajor MP, and a civilian Lt policeman, she decided I had it covered. I still don't understand why she had to check to see if my house was clean and if I had food in the house???? What does that have to do with anything? They also wanted to see my homeschool curriculum which is actually not allowable. If my child's school is in question, it has to go through the truancy office, not OCS/CPS. She actually wanted to tell my kids what was going on. I told her flat our "are you nuts". She said "they have to find out sometime" I told her that it was up to me what to tell them and when. I am their mother and am the best one to decide how much info they can handle, understand and process. WHEN they are ready, they will find out from ME, not a stranger.

Right now, the only thing I intend to tell them is that daddy broke the law and is going to jail. If and when he is a threat I will let them know that he wants to take them away and never let me see them again and they are to stay away from him if they see him. It is going to break their heart, but it is better than losing them. My kids are my life.

I am just trying to decide whether or not to tell them all together or at the same time. I don't want one's anxieties feeding another one's, but I also want them to feel that we are a family and together in this. When I had a mid term miscarriage, I told them all together. They were upset and the littlest one said "I know, but when is the baby coming home." My ds who was 6 at the time actually explained it to her better than I could have.

I did ask them if the next time we went to disney if they would mind if daddy did not come and they said "that's fine". They told me that it was more fun w/o him. They love him, but never really enjoyed him being around.

I am also not sure whether to tell his family or not. From things they have said, I suspect they know exactly what he is like. I am just not sure who's side they will take.

I guess I need to take it one step at a time. I will buy some boxes and start packing up his belongings and getting them out of the way for when the movers come for my stuff. Also need to get rid of a lot of junk.

 

[Us3]

Hi Sandra...I just wanted you to know I'm keeping you and your kids in my thoughts and prayers.

 

[Eeyore'sthebest]

Sandra - I just found this thread. I have no advice to give but wanted to let you know that you and your children will be in my thoughts and prayers.

 

[Gatordad]

my only dealings with army men are the poll that I posted where my favorite guy was the one on the phone and Al and Jim, so I can't help you there.

Keep being strong.

 

[clkelley]

you almost got it right there pete, chris is geeky, (not just a little either) but he is a cajun raised in birmingham, al

.

OMG, more family connections!! What part of B'ham?? My uncle is French Cajun and my cousins grew up in Vestavia Hills. He didn't go to Vestavia High School, did he??

 

[ftwildernessguy]

I have been involved in a few courts martial, and I can tell you that the military justice system is swift and the punishment generally severe. In the cases I was involved in, the fate of the officers were determined by a panel of 3 superior officers, in our case all three of us were full colonels trying majors and below for various infractions. Personally, I would not like to be on the receiving end of one of these trials. It's not warm and fuzzy or anything like you see on TV.

 

[ntsammy5]

Jim, you must have been active for a long time - I was only involved in one court martial - nothing trivial ever goes to a court, but this was close. They're 10 times worse for an officer though.

 

[loveDmouse]

I dont' know what to say other then our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Take care.

 

[AuburnJen92]

OMG, more family connections!! What part of B'ham?? My uncle is French Cajun and my cousins grew up in Vestavia Hills. He didn't go to Vestavia High School, did he??

Sandra, stay strong...we are with ya sister!

Carol, he went to Hewitt-Trussville. Born in New Orleans.

 

[mamaloya]

I have been involved in a few courts martial, and I can tell you that the military justice system is swift and the punishment generally severe. In the cases I was involved in, the fate of the officers were determined by a panel of 3 superior officers, in our case all three of us were full colonels trying majors and below for various infractions. Personally, I would not like to be on the receiving end of one of these trials. It's not warm and fuzzy or anything like you see on TV.

I don't know anything about military justice. All I know is that I was told that this would be handled by the military and he would face a court martial and that he is going to Leavenworth. I was told that they don't mess around, especially with this.

What should I expect? Do I have to be there or will they just look at transcripts and statements? Will I have to testify? If so, how does that work? I have to say that CID has been amazingly discreet and caring. When they come to the house, they are in unmarked cars and civies. They don't even display their badge until inside. The MPs have all been wonderful as well. When I was at the station, they had me use the back door and made sure no one was in the halls as I walked through. I have to say that the day I went in I felt like I was walking to death row. I was terrified. A chaplain friend went with me and they allowed him to stay the whole time even though they don't allow a 3rd person in the interview room. They made it as painless as possible.

It looks like the post should be operating normally tomorrow, so I will try to see what I can accomplish tomorrow. I will let you guys know what I find out. #1 priority is get the heck out of dodge.

 

[ftwildernessguy]

In the trials I was involved in, the only people present were the panel of officers I mentioned, the attornies for the government and the officer (both JAG officers) and the accused. We received testimony by tape, telephone, and in written affidavits. Generally speaking, at least what I saw, the government had their case pretty well set by the trial, and it was almost a formality. The defense was there mainly to convince us to go easy on the accused. The UCMJ pretty much sets the punishment, so the only real option is to find the defendant guilty of a lesser charge or only guilty of some of the charges. After that, the panel decides from the list of punishments what is most appropriate. Like I said earlier, Leavenworth is no party, especially for an officer. One of the few places in America where, if you are sentenced to hard labor, you get hard labor.

 

[ntsammy5]

Leavenworth is no party, especially for an officer. One of the few places in America where, if you are sentenced to hard labor, you get hard labor.

I spent a lot of time at Leavenworth and went by the stockade many, many times - it dates back to the 1800s and the walls are several feet thick and it is not a pretty place. Guard shacks all over the place - I understand it has or will move to more modern facilities, but no fun none-the-less.

There was a bakery on post that some prisoners worked at and we used to get donuts there - someone asked a guard once if we could trust the purity of the product and he assured us that if anyone did anything bad to the baked goods they would regret it very, very much. We believed him.

The only involvement I ever had with a CM was as a witness. Sterile is the best description I could give.

 

[DisneyBishops]

Good gosh, what the heck did this guy do? If he is so dangerous they should never allow him near you or your family. Did I read correctly, he is a chaplin, well if he was i hope he is punished severely here and again after he leaves this life. The first time he hit you, you should have shot the sob. I know you didn't want to hear that, but that is the way I feel about hitting and abusing women. Men that do that are not men, but little boys. I have 2 daughters and if a man ever hits them I will take care of him in my own way. Just watch out for the military, They do take care of their own.

Oh and this is from a man's perspective, so take it as such.

Sandra, when you get the chance run and never look back.

 

[stacktester]

Good gosh, what the heck did this guy do? If he is so dangerous they should never allow him near you or your family. Did I read correctly, he is a chaplin, well if he was i hope he is punished severely here and again after he leaves this life. The first time he hit you, you should have shot the sob. I know you didn't want to hear that, but that is the way I feel about hitting and abusing women. Men that do that are not men, but little boys. I have 2 daughters and if a man ever hits them I will take care of him in my own way. Just watch out for the military, They do take care of their own.

Oh and this is from a man's perspective, so take it as such.

Sandra, when you get the chance run and never look back.

Same exact words I wanted to say. I have a friend with a crematorium. It can be used lol.

 

[ftwildernessguy]

Just watch out for the military, They do take care of their own..

Not sure of what your experience with the military has been, but in my 27 years as an Army officer, I never found this to be true.

 

[DisneyBishops]

Wow not near as much as you Jim. I didn't mean that in a bad way, It can be good and bad. As you well know the Army is like a big family and they do take care of their own. It usually depends on the commanders. They mostly get it right but sometimes they don't. When military justice gets it right the UCMJ spells out the correct punishment and the military carries it out better than the civilian court system.

Oh and Thank you for you years of service to our country. I was 11c in Combat support co. 1 batt. 5th inf. 25th inf div. Did you make gen rank?

 

[auntie]

I have a friend with a crematorium. It can be used lol.

Really?.....good thing I don't..I'm sure I'd be stretching the limits of the friendship. I always worry about where to bury the bodies. It's the one thing that stops me....

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Sandra...keeping you in my thoughts ...keep us posted as to what's going on. I find it incredible that there is even the thought of his being free and able to approach you or the kids.


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