Spouse is anti-Disney

[JeremyGNJ]

Interesting...it seems like a lot of people have DH who aren't as into Disney as they are. My hubby and I took our honeymoon there and are finally going there this year with our two kids. I've been wanting to go for years and haven't been able to convince him, but after years of not going anywhere I just started planning and said, "if you're not going to divorce me over this, let's just do it." And then we talked and I discovered he's just afraid that I'm going to make ALL of our family vacations to Disney World. So our compromise is that we'll go somewhere Big every other year - and take turns planning. So I'm assuming the next time we're in Disney will be in FOUR years - and we'll probably be renting an RV and driving across the country for his choice.
It works for us - and has made planning this trip a little more enjoyable, since he knows we won't just keep going back to the same place again and again. (I really think that's what a lot of DH's are worried about.)
Oh yeah - that and we're going with friends - so he'll have a friend along and who isn't into Disney that much, and I'll have a friend along who is just as excited as I am. (We've already been figuring out all the places we can send them on their own for a beer or two.)

THAT is being a "family"!!!!!

 

[kaysmommie]

Ok, maybe anti-Disney is harsh but DH certainly doesn't appreciate it as much as I do. I think it's more parting with the money every year, than an actual dislike for Disney, when we're there he always has a good time. My children and I just love WDW and want to make it an annual tradition, every time I mention to my DH that it's time to start planning, he rolls his eyes, does a heavy sigh and says "again, we'll have to see" and then the month long argument begins. I always win the battle so I just don't understand why he insists on fighting it year after year. I really feel a DVC would be a great purchase for our family of 5 but OMG - if I even mention it the daggers come out and forget about the Disney Cruise I'd like to try for the first time next year, we'd be in divorce court if I chose to press the issue. We do pretty well financially with only our mortgage and one car lease as debt. It would just be nice for once to feel like he wanted to go and wanted to plan - instead I feel like I have to fight tooth and nail. When he finally does give in - all the fun of planning has been sucked out of the process and I just feel icky about the whole thing. Can anyone else sympathize?

I feel exactly like you. Over the weekend I started asking questions about what restaurants and things my family wanted to do at Disney this October. Well DH gave me the " This is so boring" and eye rolling attitude. Makes me fell bad for including him in the planning. I get so annoyed with his attitude that it takes the fun out ot it. Yet we always go and like you said I always win. I was at the point of tears and told me then he can stay home. I also think he doesn't like parting with the money. One thing that does interest him is the Disney Cruise so that part is good. Luckily the kids share my love for Disney. I can surely sympathize with you.

 

[palavra]

My Dh is somewhat similar. He loves theme parks overall, but when we went to Disney last year, it was late June, very hot, sticky, and tiring. He complained much of the time because he hates hot weather. We are planning to go again in late 2009 or early 2010. We won't try to go in the summer again. I hope that makes a difference, but right now, Dh is leaving our trip planning to me and doesn't seem very enthusiastic.

 

[bookwormde]

Sounds a little like my wife (except for being worried about the money) We are not Classic DWD nuts but we do like it and it is great for the kids (2). She hates planning vacations and never comes up with a place to go. A few years ago I dragged her (and some of our extended family) to the northern outer banks during the summer shoulder season, she ended up loving it (sometimes you just have to try different things). We try to go 4-5br 2x a year now OF or sof pool ht etc, except that 2-3 times out of 5 years there is no shoulder season outside of the school schedule.

What does this have to do with Disney? guess where we are going the other times. Here is my theory (currently implementing). We go to DWD for 5 weekdays with DVC
About 100 points does great for us (resale market for total cost of $8000) and I can even get a big enough place for extended family to come along (some years even a grand villa(rack rate 1170-1305 a night). After the initial cost which is not much more than 2 vacations for us it is only $500 per year or $1000 per vacation (for yearly maintenance fees) and we get deluxe accommodations at less than a moderate. We know we are coming back so we can relax at the resort sometimes instead of going commando. We do more cooking in our rooms (full kitchen and have 1 very picky eater) and save out dining $ for the special dining experiences. I buy Non expiring 10 day park hopper and with the water parks/pleasure island add on for about $50/day. That gives me 10 "extra" days that if we just want to do the water parks or we can do that for next to nothing (about $5 day of the $50) or if we can sneak out without the kids we can go to pleasure island (the advantages of taking extended family with you) so for about $2000-2400 we have 5/6 days at DWD have great accommodations and are "heroes" to the family and friend who come with us. For the Weekends we go else ware in Florida (sanibel is my choice) when the DVC rooms are typically twice as many points (hate the weekend crowds anyway)

See if this "sells" you husband on DVC (If he finds he likes it you can allways add on points later starting a 25 points).

Oh yea if in 10 or 15 year we can get our $8000 back by selling (of course it will not be worth as much then).

bookwormde

 

[Mel2421]

We are gong to Disney without him this year.

 

[DisneyBrat]

Hi my name is Lew and I am also married to an anti Disney man... WHEW now that I got that off my chest I feel like I can go to the next step LOL My question is why is it because Mr Anti Mickey says I dont wanna go (fuss fuss fuss )that we (mom and kiddos) have to be deprived? My hubby is a sweetheart and would try to give me the moon if I asked but when it comes to Disney WHOA let the battle of the Kingdom begin. I usually talk him into it after oh say several hours a day x weeks x months of pleading LOL But the bottom line is I still feel hurt and somewhat angry that just because "HE* says I dont want to go is fair to the rest of our family that wants to go. I know alot of women go without their hubbies but to me that just wouldn't be the same and we would miss him too much to fully enjoy our time. A missing link from our family chain would be missing. Alrighty im hopping down off my soap box now anyone got some laundry they need done because I have made enough soap to do everyones wash hehehe


Lew

 

[mommytoone]

My DH is the same way, except he doesn't even go. Which is ok with me. I wish he would be able to get off work, but he doesn't even try. I guess thats a blessing, all he would do is complain about spending money. My DD and I are goin in Sept without him, again. We have a blast and it is a good bonding time for the two of us.

 

[srwarden1928]

We seem to have been the reverse of most of the couples on this board. I am the one who loves to go on trips. I have been doing this all my life. DW did not have the opportunity growing up, although her mother once said to me "We need to go on a vacation every year." We had been married for almost 13 years (together for almost 15) before I talked her into our first trip to Disney. She wants to go again in 2 years to take our neice for college graduation. I have to talk her into most of the vacations we take. She would be content to stay at home. I would NOT like to stay at home all the time. When I am off work and not taking classes, I am ready to go SOMEwhere. She always has a good time, just doesnt usually get into the planning. I was pleased that she actually suggested going to Cirque this time. I made sure to include this in our plans. Meanwhile after having been to Disney for the first time in years, I am becoming Disney obsessed.

 

[mickeyfan1226]

I thought maybe I was the only one in the world who had a spouse who is anti-disney. We have been married for almost 22 yrs and have actually been on 1 vacation that did not include going to a family's place. When our son was a senior I decided to take a vacation. I made the arrangements and TOLD spouse he was going. The trip was 3 days in Orlando and then a 7 day cruise aboard the Disney Wonder. Thought he was enjoying things but then when we returned home he announced that he would not do it again. I have been on another cruise which was around our 20th anniversary and I went with his parents and an aunt. In Nov. of 07 my girls and I went to WDW for the first time and it was with my father, his wife, my brother and family, my sister and family. NO spouse. Now I am planning our next trip to WDW which will once again not include spouse. My sister and I planning on taking a trip with our kids every other year if not every year. In 2011 we are either going to go to WDW or take another disney cruise and take my DGD who will be 6 at that time. I don't really want to take her before then because I don't think she will enjoy it and I know I wont enjoy if I have to be a baby sitter. LOL

 

[mickeyfan1226]

Disneybrat, I see that you stayed in the shades of green. I am curious and hope you can answers my questions. If you stay there you can not take advantage of the DDP correct?!? You can take advantage of the magical extra hours though??? It might just be easier for you to tell me how it works to stay there.

 

[DisneyBrat]

Disneybrat, I see that you stayed in the shades of green. I am curious and hope you can answers my questions. If you stay there you can not take advantage of the DDP correct?!? You can take advantage of the magical extra hours though??? It might just be easier for you to tell me how it works to stay there.

First let me say Shades of Green in NICE! I was reluctent when we booked but when we got there WOW very nice! No you can't use Disney DDP BUT they have a buffet style restaurant at Shades. We ate at Manginos(italian one night,the service was TERRIBLE! They didn't charge me for my meal because it was almost cold after waiting 1/2 hr or more to get it. HOWEVER I have read where others loved manginos. You can use the Magical extra hours and we did They really do help you see more. Just make sure you learn the bus route and times.. Animal Kingdom was awkward on the time for us we thought it left say on the 1/4 hr but it left at 10 after the hour or something like that... needless to say we missed our bus by 1 or 2 minutes and had to wait another hour for the next. Overall if you learn how the system works it was easy. We also bought the sun n shade fun package. Everyday we had a hot buffet breakfast,a couple of starbuck coupons,20 giftshop bucks that was a good deal for us. We bought extra days even though it says 5 days I think we doubled the package. Enjoy! If you need any other questions I might help with let me know

 

[tyandbash]

My DH isn't Disney crazy like me, however, he loves it there as much as I do. I don't think he would ever admit that though. After we went the first time I discovered he could play golf there, (which is his favorite all time activity) so now, depending on how long we go for, he plays two or three times a vacation. My ds (11) has started to go with him at least once and my dd's and I (9 & 5) go to a princess meal. We were last there in August, and after that trip he insisted we take a year off. So, now we are going to Disneyland this August, lol!! He isn't into the planning AT ALL. He wants nothing to do with that, and doesn't even want to answer questions about it. BUT, if we are stuck waiting a really long time for a PS he will be the first one to say "My wife made this reservation 6 months ago, why are we waiting so long??" I think it is so funny, and since I am obsessed with the planning and love that almost as much as the actual trip, it works for us!!

 

[mickeyfan1226]

First let me say Shades of Green in NICE! I was reluctent when we booked but when we got there WOW very nice! No you can't use Disney DDP BUT they have a buffet style restaurant at Shades. We ate at Manginos(italian one night,the service was TERRIBLE! They didn't charge me for my meal because it was almost cold after waiting 1/2 hr or more to get it. HOWEVER I have read where others loved manginos. You can use the Magical extra hours and we did They really do help you see more. Just make sure you learn the bus route and times.. Animal Kingdom was awkward on the time for us we thought it left say on the 1/4 hr but it left at 10 after the hour or something like that... needless to say we missed our bus by 1 or 2 minutes and had to wait another hour for the next. Overall if you learn how the system works it was easy. We also bought the sun n shade fun package. Everyday we had a hot buffet breakfast,a couple of starbuck coupons,20 giftshop bucks that was a good deal for us. We bought extra days even though it says 5 days I think we doubled the package. Enjoy! If you need any other questions I might help with let me know

Thank you for the info. We are trying to decide what would save the most money. We are wanting to do more character meals this time.

 

[mousefanmichelle]

It does make it hard when you like something and your spouse doesn't. I happen to love Florida - always have. I would go there just to go there but my dh doesn't like it. He has been there, done that. He isn't a fan of doing the same thing or seeing the same place over and over again. So last year we went without him. We plan on doing it again next year. I asked him last night if he would go next year with us and I asked him to really consider it. He said he would. I hope he comes it would be more fun to share the vacation with him and our kids would love to see him play - he doesn't do that too often.

It was a little sad for me last year when we first were admitted into the MK and I saw the castle all I could think about was how he should have been there to share that with us and he wasn't. It was the first time our kids had been there and it was my first time since I was 10 - but he just wasn't intrested in being there no matter what. I tried and tried to beg him and make it look great but it didn't work. I really hope that it works for next year, but time will tell. (send some pixie dust my way Tinker Bell!!!!)

 

[lysander]

Disney is great, but really, every year might be a bit much with the wide world of experiences to show your children. there are beautiful cities with great family activities, natural wonders, historically significant places, forests, mountains, beaches, lakes, deserts, museums, skyscrapers........and I'm just thinking US, since the dollar has plummeted so comparatively. Disney is not going anywhere- widen your horizons. The kids will thank you.

 

[JeremyGNJ]

Disney is great, but really, every year might be a bit much with the wide world of experiences to show your children. there are beautiful cities with great family activities, natural wonders, historically significant places, forests, mountains, beaches, lakes, deserts, museums, skyscrapers........and I'm just thinking US, since the dollar has plummeted so comparatively. Disney is not going anywhere- widen your horizons. The kids will thank you.

 

[Crisgw]

My husband isn't a big fan of WDW. He sees it more of a "requirement" for our kids. I LOVE LOVE LOVE WDW and I know that he is very "eh" about it and we manage to work it out. He complains the WHOLE time (while I'm planning) but once we get there, and he sees the boys having a blast, he's much better

 

[Bethy Lou]

My dh reintroduced me to WDW when we were dating. I had not been since I was a kid and the last trip was a disaster. He reawakened my love for WDW so much that we decided to get married at Disney, honeymoon there and get annual passes! I feel terrible for women who have a strong passion for WDW and have husbands who do not share the passion with them. We had passes as a kid and although we also went other places for vacation I want my children to have the same love for Disney that I do and I am glad my husband and I see eye to eye on this!

 

[eliza61]

What a bunch of selfish.....

Not everyone likes the same stuff you know. It might not be that your husbands "dont get it", they just might prefer other things.

how about suggesting something different on alternating years, or.....*gasp*.....letting him pick the place, even if it's not your ideal vacation!

I'll probably get flamed for this, but here goes...... It is his vacation, too, and I think his desires should be considered -- at least every other year or so anyway. I am assuming he works and his earnings are paying (or helping to pay) for these annual vacations. I don't think that is unreasonable -- especially is another trip to WDW starts an annual month long argument.

.

Man, I'm so glad some one said this. Why do we insist that because we love Disney everyone we come in contact with has to love it to?

Sorry Op,
I am so on your husbands side and think that is a really lousy way to have a marriage if every vacation has to be your way or no way.
I own a dvc and would never think of purchasing some thing so expensive if every one was not on board. Grow up.

 

[KayLuvsMickey]

I love Disney. My husband loves Disney, we love sharing Disney with our friends that love Disney.

However, we do like to do other things. So if my husband said, "let's skip Dis this year and go to Ireland", I'd start Packin'!

It is ok to share all kinds of experiences.