Spinoff...Do you do gifts for everyone at Christmas?

[zachnsamsmommy]

So...title says it all. do you do gifts for everyone at Christmas/holidays?

We don't anymore...

It changed about 3 years ago to gifts for the kids, and drawing names for adult gifts (in my family...still do the adults on ILs side). Last year my bro suggested no gifts at all for adults, and just kid gifts. Which in this economy is a huge relief for us. My brother gets the short end of the stick, however, b/c he isn't married and doesn't have kids. So, the dogs get a small gift .

I'm a 'go with the flow' type of person, so this arrangement works well for us.

So...how is it done at your house?

 

[SCHBR'smom]

gifts for all

 

[Handbag Lady]

We no longer have kids in our family so you'd think that the presents would stop, right?

Uh, no. I have to buy for eleven grown-ups. I like black Friday very much.

 

[AKL_Megs]

DH and I - We usually come up with a list or tell each other what we want, and we both usually get what we want.

My parents - Same thing, we usually do lists. My parents do "together" and separate presents. We buy them separate presents.

DH's mom - Also, the same thing. Lists.

Extended family - I don't have one. DH's family does "Guy and Girl". You spend $10 on a guy gift, $10 on a girl gift, they are wrapped and put under a tree and handed out to the correct sex when gifts are done. The young kids get a separate small gift.

 

[horseshowmom]

No, we don't. Over the years, we've cut back considerably and have a lot less stress (not to mention a much better bottom line).

 

[sue1013]

Not for DHs and my parents, sisters, brothers or nieces and nephews. We do a grab bag for each family. We started a couple of years ago mostly for my mother and ILs. They are all retired and need to watch their spending. It has worked out great for us also. We're in our 50's and want to be cleaning out not adding to. We still buy for DS, DD, DSIL and DGD.

 

[SC Minnie]

DH side there was 7 siblings. They have been drawing names for the siblings and their spouses for many years. Now that the grandchildren are older they can opt into the drawing after they graduate from HS. We don't do anything for the younger grandchildren.

My side- I just have one brother and he has 3 kids. My brother and I have never really exchanged gifts. I do get something for his kids and he will get something for mine. Since the kids are almost grown I usually just get them a GC because I have no idea what they want/need.

 

[dissybroad]

howdy! we tried drawing one name from the hat, then just do what you want-no structure. now it's no gifts for family though i still send something to each of my brothers' three kids and my adult daughters.

 

[BriarfoxinWA]

for a couple of years my DH's family drew names for the adults and gave gifts to the kids (there weren't very many). Somewhere along the line they quit doing this so we give gifts to my parents, his parents, our kids, DS girlfriend, SIL, nephew & M&FIL. I don't do extended family or my brother & sisters family. (My brother and sister live across the country and they don't send us gifts)

 

[JLitfin]

There is four of us and my parents in my family. Now we have 24 on my side of the family counting sisters, husbands, brother, his wife, kids, their husbands, myself, my DH, my kids and my parents. We used to buy for everyone, then our family just kept growing, so now we purchase gifts for everyone under 21 years of age and 21 and up we draw names.

This year we talked about doing a special get-together over Christmas week instead of drawing names but this was ruled out, so we are back to drawing names. My parents said it would be two hard finding a date that would suit everyone, and they wanted to exchange gifts.

 

[pat fan]

On the IL's side, we buy for my DFIL and his girlfriend, the kids and one nephews girlfriend. We don't buy for my DSIL and her DH because she said she wanted to stop exchanging gifts with the adults. Ummmm it's only her and her DH and my DH (her brother) and myself. Guess it's a savings for her...whatever....They still buy for all her DH's family, just not DH & I. Maybe it's us

On my side we draw names but still buy a gift for my parents, so they get double-dipped. We also do a yankee swap, so are we really saving anything? I don't know...but it is fun after we got used to it.

I like Christmas threads

 

[suzimar57]

we no longer do gifts for all - just a calendar each for my mother and sister - my son will get a calendar and $100 cash - that's it, nothing more - DH and i don't exchange either - too many past years of spending money on people we didn't like who gave us crap in return

we also don't "host" dinner at our home anymore either - after years of having relatives making snarky comments on the food, decorations and gifts, we decided we're done - now, DH and i go out for dinner at a nice hotel on christmas day for brunch alone by ourselves - i don't have to cook/clean-up, and no more stress from unappreciative relatives

ho ho ho!

 

[ZachnElli]

On Dh's side, we only get gifts for the kids and we draw names for them. We stopped getting gifts for the adults years ago. With 4 siblings (adults), plus spouses, plus a total of 10 kids (grandkids) it got to be too much. This year, there is talk of no gifts because of job losses and it being a tough year for several family members. My mil and fil didn't get their grandkids anything last year. I know they are on a fixed income, but they have to get gifts for their friends first!

 

[luvmy3]

We buy for our parents and grandparents but we do not buy for dh's siblings ( I don't have any). We pick names for the nieces and nehews because there are 16 of them and it can get pretty pricey.
We also buy for our 2 Godchildren. They are our friends kids and they don't have any real aunts and uncles so we are more than happy to fill in.

 

[laceemouse]

We only buy for our kids. I don't think it is necessary to buy for any adults, unless you have parents who are financially strapped or something. Dh and I both come from families where everyone has more stuff than they could ever possibly need, if I bought gifts for my siblings and his I would be looking for useless executive toys and stuff, that is just a bunch of junk no one needs. Dh and I don't even buy for each other, if we want something we generally get is regardless of the season. Gosh, even our kids have a hard time making a Christmas list these days. They are past the toy stage and really can't think of much they still want. I guess we are weird.

 

[Goofydiane]

I no longer give gifts to my parents, family or friends. I instead spend the same amount of money on toys and donate them all to Toys For Tots and let everyone know that I donated toys in their name. Have been doing this for 3 years now and have had no complaints.

Last year, I had a couple people say...could you buy this toy to donate in my name this year.

I also ask for no gifts. I'm employed, own a home, earn a good living and am healthy, so I'm taken care of.

 

[EthansMom]

For extended family members, we've largely stopped exchanging individual gifts. We usually give family photos to our parents (our kids' grandparents) and a $20 GC to each of the nieces and nephews (6 of them). Last year, I gave $1 scratch lotto tix to the adults and that was a huge hit.

As another poster mentioned, I also stopped hosting the holiday meal due to people being bad guests (showing up VERY late and expecting us to hold dinner; not bringing foods they said they'd bring and letting me know ahead of time so I could plan; adults throwing fits; etc..). I'd MUCH rather spend Thanksgiving and Christmas Day at home without visiting anyone.... a lot more relaxing and enjoyable.

 

[Feralpeg]

I only buy from my sister, my daughter and one of my brothers. The only reason I buy for my brother is because he is not married and has no one else to buy for him. Our parents died a long time ago.

I stopped buying from my other brother, sister-in-law, niece and nephew once the kids became adults. They can buy for their parents now.

For me, it wasn't about spending the money. It just seemed ridiculous. Every year, we'd all stress over what to get each other. We are all in a position to buy what we want for ourselves. They live across the country, so we never knew what the other ones needed. It got to the point of buying each other gift cards. If it couldn't be more personal than that, it didn't seem to make sense.