Son w/Asperger's started middle school- Update Page 6

[Rustysmom]

I just want to wish you good luck.

My DS has either high functioning PDD or Asperger's, depending on what doctor you talk to, and he sounds very much like your son. Loses everything, forgets everything. He writes his homework in chicken scratch and when I ask him what page he has to do, he looks at it, looks at me and does this:

We are VERY lucky for now because his school just went K-8, so he can stay in his inclusion class until 8th grade. They don't change classes and the teachers come to them. No lockers and very small class size (22).

He has a 1-1 aide and has since Kindergarten and they have tried to wean him away from her, but he goes off to la la land if left on his own.

I'm not looking forward to the high school years when he will have to change classes and deal with lockers and all that.

 

[missypie]

High school....AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! DS is a Junior....here was his day yesterday:

1. I dropped him off at school early for a choir sectional that was actually supposed to be today.

2. Before the Pre-Calc test, the teacher took up the review sheets for a grade. He hadn't understood that they were supposed to complete the review sheets....he had just filled in a few things to study from, so he got a 44 on the review sheet.

3. In English, they are starting to read "The Crucible" - 100 points if you brought the book in; he didn't remember so that's 100 points he doesn't have.

4. He stayed after school for a Jazz Choir rehearsal that everyone else knew had been cancelled.

That's DS' life during the school year. He's such a sweetheart though ...I want to hug him and strangle him, all at the same time.

I do wish that the teachers could see their classes/requirements through our eyes. So many of the things they get points/credit for have nothing to do with actually learning the subject matter. If you miss so many points for things like forgetting to bring a book to school, a child could truly fail a class while having total mastery of the subject matter.

 

[pcparamedics01]

I just want to wish you good luck.

My DS has either high functioning PDD or Asperger's, depending on what doctor you talk to, and he sounds very much like your son. Loses everything, forgets everything. He writes his homework in chicken scratch and when I ask him what page he has to do, he looks at it, looks at me and does this:

We are VERY lucky for now because his school just went K-8, so he can stay in his inclusion class until 8th grade. They don't change classes and the teachers come to them. No lockers and very small class size (22).

He has a 1-1 aide and has since Kindergarten and they have tried to wean him away from her, but he goes off to la la land if left on his own.

I'm not looking forward to the high school years when he will have to change classes and deal with lockers and all that.

I am not looking forward to middle school. My son 9 HFA also has a 1-1 aide and this year he is in the trailors, "I mean Learning Cottages". This is the first year in an inclusion class. It is nice! Great teachers, his aide there for additional support too.

 

[Luv Bunnies]

Maybe more good news - the onene aide that was promised at his IEP almost a month ago finally materialized today! He is supposed to have the aide for the first 4 periods of the day which will cover 2 periods of english, math and science. After lunch he has PE, social studies, intervention and advisory and won't have the aide for those classes. Hopefully he will click with the aide and start feeling better about school.

Regarding the "intervention" class, I'm still a little upset about how they handled it. They decided 3 weeks into the year that some kids needed an "intervention" class to help with academics, my son included. They pulled these kids out of their elective classes to be in intervention. The problem is, they didn't send home a note about it until the first day the kids were pulled. I had no idea that the class was being considered for my son until it had already happened. He was really enjoying his elective too. If the aide had been in place from the first day, maybe he wouldn't need to be pulled out of his elective right now. His elective was "Healthy Living" which he really needs. Last night, he was measuring his Cherrios in a cup to see what one serving looked like. He said he learned that he should only eat one serving at a time so he wouldn't eat too much. This is good stuff for a kid who's a little overweight! I don't like the fact that they pulled him from that class without even informing his parents!

 

[Luv Bunnies]

....and the aide quit after one day! All I know is that she was "not comfortable with her assignment." Supposedly another one will start tomorrow. Is there no end to this madness? I'm starting to laugh about it now. What else can I do?

 

[pcparamedics01]

....and the aide quit after one day! All I know is that she was "not comfortable with her assignment." Supposedly another one will start tomorrow. Is there no end to this madness? I'm starting to laugh about it now. What else can I do?

Another one has to be in place tomorrow! So terrible!!!

 

[Schmeck]

....and the aide quit after one day! All I know is that she was "not comfortable with her assignment." Supposedly another one will start tomorrow. Is there no end to this madness? I'm starting to laugh about it now. What else can I do?

Well, you can't force someone to work at a job they don't want to do, can you? I hope they find another aide for your son as soon as possible, one that is more comfortable working with your son. What does your son say about her? Was there some miscommunication about what she was supposed to do?

Don't expect one tomorrow though - they need to post the opening, interview, do a background check, etc, if they are hiring someone not already in the school system. It took 4 days to OK me when I was first hired.

 

[pcparamedics01]

Well, you can't force someone to work at a job they don't want to do, can you? I hope they find another aide for your son as soon as possible, one that is more comfortable working with your son. What does your son say about her? Was there some miscommunication about what she was supposed to do?

Don't expect one tomorrow though - they need to post the opening, interview, do a background check, etc, if they are hiring someone not already in the school system. It took 4 days to OK me when I was first hired.

I totally disagree with the OP they should have someone that will take over immediately there are no posting for this!!!!! It is part of he IEP.

 

[missypie]

As terrible (and you're right-almost comical) for the aide to quit after one day, you sure don't want someone working with your son who hates her job!

 

[JESW]

It's tough, isn't it? I have a ds12 in 7th grade who is an apsie with learning disabilities and anxiety. Middle school, especially 6th grade last year was a nightmare. He had an IEP, was pulled out for classes and even had two aides splitting the job as it was too stressful for one to have it full-time! Even with all that he still struggled. We were very fortunate that last march he was pulled out of the local public school and put into a collaborative inside another middle school (different town). The kids are part of the school - but also separate. Small classes, more one-on-one work, notebook goes home very day with comments from teachers/aides/counselor, whoever writes it that day so we know what's going on - we also write what goes on at home. If a child is having issues they can pull them out of the classroom and go into an empty one to calm down or take them for a walk to work it out. There are many opportunities for social learning, peers come into their classrooms from the school to work with the kids, they have modified gym, they go on more field trips and many other things. This is our first year with ds starting from the beginning so there are more things we are learning. He was on a downward spiral in middle school and we feared for his mental state. Inclusion does not work for all of these kids.

I hope things get better for your son!

Jill

 

[JESW]

...about aides...in the public school ds went to they had a list of available aides and they were able to get qualified people in - even for the next day - without having to post the job. Not sure if other schools do that..??

Jill

 

[Luv Bunnies]

Supposedly there was another person starting today - someone who already worked at the school as a yard duty. I asked the principal last night at Back to School night if this new person had any experience with special needs kids and she said yes. I'll have to see how it went when I pick him up.

Apparently, he got along with the first aide fine but he kept telling her to stop hovering over him. He's not used to someone sitting there and continually prodding him. He'll have to get used to that. But the aide should also have a backbone and not let him scare her away or offend her. He's not a mean kid at all, but he does like his space.

 

[Schmeck]

Glad to hear they found someone quickly. JESW, we have substitutes available, but they are not willing to be hired on a regular basis. They are mostly retirees who want to work 2-3 days a week. Most of them wouldn't make it through a 5 day work week, actually... But we don't have a list of qualified aides waiting to be employed, except at the beginning of the year, if we've had lay-offs. Before anyone can be employed by our school system, they need to be screened with a CORI, etc. That takes a few days, at least!

 

[pcparamedics01]

Supposedly there was another person starting today - someone who already worked at the school as a yard duty. I asked the principal last night at Back to School night if this new person had any experience with special needs kids and she said yes. I'll have to see how it went when I pick him up.

Apparently, he got along with the first aide fine but he kept telling her to stop hovering over him. He's not used to someone sitting there and continually prodding him. He'll have to get used to that. But the aide should also have a backbone and not let him scare her away or offend her. He's not a mean kid at all, but he does like his space.

Wonderful great news !!!!

 

[pcparamedics01]

It's tough, isn't it?

Very tough at times no one understands unless they are in our shoes!!! Chin up!!!!

 

[pcparamedics01]

Apparently, he got along with the first aide fine but he kept telling her to stop hovering over him. He's not used to someone sitting there and continually prodding him. He'll have to get used to that. But the aide should also have a backbone and not let him scare her away or offend her. He's not a mean kid at all, but he does like his space.

But you know what if she is hovering over him it is a good indication she wants to be a great parapro! I still think it will be OK Luv Bunnies!

 

[pcparamedics01]

Supposedly there was another person starting today - someone who already worked at the school as a yard duty. I asked the principal last night at Back to School night if this new person had any experience with special needs kids and she said yes. I'll have to see how it went when I pick him up.

Apparently, he got along with the first aide fine but he kept telling her to stop hovering over him. He's not used to someone sitting there and continually prodding him. He'll have to get used to that. But the aide should also have a backbone and not let him scare her away or offend her. He's not a mean kid at all, but he does like his space.

My whole point, but I did not include! She maybe hovering because she did not know what her role is yet. Give her two weeks she can discuss this with you! Let us know if the replacement worked out for the better!!!!

 

[Cheshire Figment]

OK Folks.

Let's look calmly at this situation. If you have comments, especially toward the original poster, please try to make them positive in nature as support and useful suggestions are clearly necessary.

Each person is entitled to their opinion. If you have factual reasons to disagree with the post, please discuss facts. If you have an opinion that is disagreeing with specific posts please discuss your reasons for disagreement and politely explain why you disagree with the opinion.

Remember, you can disagree with a message, but don't shoot the messenger.

Mike

 

[pcparamedics01]

How did day two go with your aide today?

 

[tryinbeatscryin]

1) Get an outside evaluation from a psychologist with recommendations. this can help you have an "unbiased opinion". Some doctors will even come to a school meeting with you to advocate for your child and have more influence than just what you, the child's parent (!) can tell them.

2) Asperger's kids have probelms with what is called "executive control" which is organizing, getting started, and controlling emotions at times. This is not your child's fault and these skills will just take longer to learn. So you will have to do the coaching.

3) Get a watch that beeps at transition times, put up reminder charts, or clip tags to backpack with a "picture" of homework. Anything visual would help.