Solo and RUDE COMMENT!!!

[smoof]

Wow, a day at the San Diego Zoo alone sounds wonderful!!! Go it alone at Disney, and have fun!

 

[VAN]

I've been to WDW on my own before and loved it ... I was at a conference and stayed an extra day to visit the parks. I left my room and was walking through the Lobby and saw someone from the conference ... yikes, I quickly ducked out before they could see me and invite themselves along as a companion!!

I have to say that that day was one of the best. I was able to do what I wanted, when I wanted, for as long as I wanted!! I was able to converse with strangers without my DH or kids telling me to hurry up or giving me the evil eye.

When I was single I remember being comfortable going to the movies and even some restaurants by myself without being uncomfortable. Once you get comfortable in your own skin, you actually prefer to be "alone" rather than some people ... there are those that can suck the life out of you with their whining, problems, energy, etc. Sometimes it is good to be your own best friend and to rediscover what it is you like so much about yourself.

I really don't see why it bothers people that someone is alone ... maybe it's their own insecurity ...

 

[Ariel07]

Well this is why I love my dogs - people can just be so rude!!

 

[Ms. WDW]

I'm actually going solo for the very first time this October. DH can't get the time off and my "traveling pal" has a conflict with her fall school schedule. So, I've always wanted to do a solo trip and now I have the chance!!

Just think; do what I want when I want and not have to worry about hearing "you want us to get up at WHAT TIME??? Or "you want to go on THAT RIDE again"?????

Yep; I don't think any rude comment in the world will ruin my 4 days alone in WDW this October!

 

[RADOPT]

I see being a mom of a big family is not the only situation that is rudely commented on. Why can't people just keep all rude comments to themselves?

Maybe because it is the only way they can feel superior?!?

I get it because my daughter are handicapped. Amazing how many people feel entitled to make comments to complete strangers.

 

[DisneyJMG]

Unfortunately, rudeness exists in all walks of life and even Disney isn't immune. I would like to think most people who strike up a conversation with someone who appears to be solo have good intentions. I've been to Disney 3 times solo, mostly to escape work or in one case, study. All my solo visits were very pleasent and without incident. The CMs I encountered were very accommadating. It seems most people prefer not to dine alone. Sometimes the person's demeanor makes that obvious and other's may pick up on this. The wait staff may spend extra time with them, or another diner may strike up a conversation. On the other hand, maybe this perfect stranger is attracted to them and wants to be chivalrous. Not all of us have the gift for gab, so maybe it just doesn't come out the way they intended. Unless someone has an obvious scowl on their face, I would give them the benefit of the doubt.

 

[HGLightlyj]

That's terrible!! Why would anyone be so ignorant??? What business is it of his anyways?? Lots of circumstances can lead to somebody being solo....why does he think pointing it out is any of his business??? Really, the nerve of some people.

I was solo in WDW for my second trip and was in Epcot for the day. I had 2 comments about travelling solo - not anything rude, just the question: "for how many?? Oh - ok, here ya go" type of thing. Then I went to the world showcase and got my margherita at Mexico and was sitting and relaxing by the lagoon when this older couple sat down and commented LOUDLY about me being solo. I, at this point, was a little self conscious about the solo bit (this was my fourth day solo, and the day before didn't go so well either), and kind of did something that maybe I shouldn't of, but at the time, I thought I was doing solo people justice. The wife asked why I was alone (because this is any of her business) so I kind of told a white lie and said that this was my trip that I took every year (this part was true) with my fiance (didn't have one at the time) and that he unfortunately passed away and I thought I would take the trip in his memory. The lady grabbed my hand and said it took courage to do that....

I know - it was a terrible thing to do...and I shouldn't have done it. But, a) I don't know how I kept a straight face, and b) at the time, it kind of felt good to just stop people in their tracks and make them think before asking something that is NONE of their business.

Anyways, I think unfortunately people will say things that are innapropriate no matter where you go....

On the rare occasions, I get comments, I usually just say my family couldn't agree on which park to go to so I decided to do my own thing. A little white lie, but it sounds logical to me.

 

[inkkognito]

There is no need to justify why you are alone, and it's really not anyone's business. I like the response from the person who said to respond with a question of your own. I'm a doctor of psychology, and that's an assertivenss strategy I teach in general. When they ask, "Are you alone?" toss it right back: "Why do you ask?" or "Why is it important for you to know?" or "Are you in the habit of asking questions like that frequently?" That puts THEM on the defensive!

Both my DH and I go to WDW alone frequently. We live right by the parks and our schedules don't always mesh (plus I don't do summer crowds, while he doesn't mind them at all). I've never even noticed the reactions of people around me, but I tend to be pretty well endowed in the self confidence dept. If someone made a comment, I'd look at them like they were nuts and say, "Wow, what a weird thing to say. I hope you don't say things like that often because it really makes you look strange." or some other thing that puts the stigma right onto them.

For me, going alone is very, very therapeutic and relaxing. As a counselor, I deal with other people all day so WDW is wonderful escape. Far from trying to blend into the crowd, I usually wear a conversation starter such as a headpiece that makes it look like I have a monorail running through my head. People love that one! Maybe they never comment on my solo status because they are too busy chatting about my headgear!

 

[kmmccart75]

Okay, I joined today just to respond to this thread. I am sure some people out there are being mean when they ask whether an apparently solo traveler is alone, because some people are just like that. However, I want to offer another possible explanation...

My husband and I were in Disney a few years back with my mother. We had three tickets to La Nouba, but that evening my mother was too tired and told us to drop her at the hotel and go ahead. So, after dinner we were in Downtown Disney and noticed a woman who appeared to be alone, and thought we would offer her (free) the third ticket, since we weren't going to use it. I made the mistake of asking the question "Are you alone?" I guess I should have thought about it and phrased my question differently, but my intentions were good. Well, she shot back some horrible comeback like some of the ones suggested in this thread (some personal attack on my own confidence or something) and stormed off before I could apologize and explain. I felt awful and the seat went unused because I was so shaken (almost to tears) that I didn't want to try again.

So, my point is that even if at first a question seems rude, you might not want to assume the worst and give them an earful. I think the idea of responding with "why do you ask?" is terrific though, because that would have given me the opportunity to say "oh, because I've got this ticket..."

Just my two cents, FWIW.

 

[TDC Nala]

but when they say "just one" will you feel that you have to say "my husband couldn't get off work" lest they think you're one of those sad ones with no family? Of course, then they might give you crap for daring to travel and do something fun without your husband.

I'm not going to make up a family so I appear to be "normal" but I can see doing it if it will shut the questioner up. It probably works because they're reassured that you're really "one of them."

 

[Redbudlover]

I think the reason people seem so surprised or make comments is that if they were alone they would be terrified of going anywhere alone. That is what keeps so many in terrible, unhappy relationships.

Being alone for me is so freeing. When traveling I meet many more people than I would if with someone else. I have traveled all over the world alone and had a great time and came home with amazing memories and stories. I loved my solo trip to WDW last fall. Granted I enjoy going with others as well, but sometimes going alone is so much better.