signs you're at a bad motel....

When you are sure you can see the faded *SL* on the sign that reads EAZY 8 :rotfl:
 
The door has the regular lock - along with three dead-bolt locks and a chain..

There are bars on all of the windows..

The back of the hotel is surrounded by barbed-wire fence..

True story - just outside of Newport, Rhode Island..:eek:
 
1) You check in and go to use the bathroom only to realize that somebody has used the toilet and forgot to flush. Ewwwww

2) You look outside and the lawn is covered in dog poop (the hotel allows dogs). You go outside and see more dog poop and tell the front desk who tells you that dog owners are supposed to clean up after themselves. You tell them that it obviously isn't happening and that somebody should be cleaning it up. Request ignored. Note to self, stay on the pathways and don't cut across grass to car.

Last time we stayed at the Ramada in Grand Forks, ND
 
The bed has a "black" blanket on it. Black referring to the color of the blanket, usually they are tan!!
Room came equipted with 3 fly swatters, and we needed all of them.
Tried to read, but they only had 25w lite bulbs.
There were more notes on everything about what to do and not do, that it was hard to know what you could do.
Ate at the adjoining restaurant for breakfast and were served blacken toast and it was cold.
Asked to have a thermos filled (were willing to pay for the coffee) and were told "not sure if we have enough coffee to do that".
This was in the UP of MI -- upon leaving my husband promised me we would never have to stay there again!!!
 

The front desk clerk is surprised you want the room the whole night - I'm guessing it's clients are the hourly type.

The TV looks like the first one ever made (no remote control) and it's bolted to the floor, only has four channels that come in clear enough to watch and two of them were Spanish channels. Also the knob is missing and in it's place is a set of pliers.

The linens looked like they have not been changed for quite some time so you sleep on top of the bed on top of your coat.:scared:

The bathroom is so disgusting you don't take a shower - and it's so dim in there that you can't really see anything. I was kind of thankful for that, I don't think I would have wanted to see the bathroom under bright lights anyway.

You wear your shoes the whole time, even to bed just in case you have to get up because you don't want bare feet or even socked feet on the floors.

You can see on the door where the deadbolt had been replaced several times. :scared1:

This was some motel we had to stay at in Jacksonville, FL because the Comfort Inn we were scheduled to stay at did not have a room for us when we arrived in town a day early. When we checked into the Comfort Inn the next day it was like a palace - a shower never felt so good.
 
We were driving to Colorado and stopped in Salina, KS. There was a Holiday Inn Express, and next door to it was the Salina Inn. I wanted the Holiday Inn Express, mom thought the Salina Inn looked like it had "character." Oh boy:

-We had to put down a $10 deposit on the tv remote.

-The door (outdoor access room) was no sturdier than my bedroom door in the apartment and could be done in with one swift kick.

-The door had a crack running diagonally the entire length that you could see through! (Again, outside access room)

-We had to tape a blanket over the door so that we had privacy (and because it was 30 degrees out).

-We had to shove furniture in front of the door because it was so flimsy.

-The rest of the room was as scuzzy as could be.

Mom knows that we now stay in national chains like Holiday Inn. If she says a hotel looks like it has character, that's her clue not to stay.

Another time, she stayed at a Best Western in West Virginia. The woman at the desk looked at her and said that she would give her the room next to the lobby (not a good sign.) Turned out most people used it as a brothel. Mom is no longer allowed to pick hotels.

At a Days Inn in Eureka, MO (Six Flags) I opened the shower to discover a dirty wash cloth. :scared1: Bagged it, walked to the front desk, and asked for a bottle of cleaner to clean it with since it obviously had not been cleaned.
 
The pictures are not placed for decoration but to cover up recent bullet holes.
 
You won't take off your shoes because the one time you did, the carpeted floor was sticky (ew!)
 
When you tell the front desk you saw a roach and they reply
"Only one?"

Oh and this was the Best Western at Kings Dominion. AVOID IT!
 
You get back late from enjoying a night out. Swear you hear gunshots as you are getting ready to go to sleep. When you wake up in the morning you see blood splattered on the walkway and a huge pool of blood that is 'roped off' by the police.
 
When you are told at a St. Pete's beach motel at 8:45 that 9pm is "quiet time"! :lmao: Apparently we didn't realize that the Plaza RV was NOT the Plaza Resort Villa like the brochure said, but instead the Plaza Retirement Village!! I swear my friends and I were the only people there under 80! Just thinking about the decor even now makes me LOL!
 
When DH feels compelled to sit up most of the night with a gun handy because the locals are fighting just outside the door.

this happened as we were moving across the country. DH made me sleep on the bed farthest from the door with DS who was 1yr old at the time. I didn't realize he'd done this until the next day. Northern Ontario is not a safe place!
 
When 4 people all wake up at 3:30 AM wondering who is eating the peanuts, only to find mice in the bag. This happened in Medina, OH.

When you can't tell the color of the carpet because the main color is "dirt"-Motel 6 east Columbus, OH.

When an all night orgy is going on in a parking lot and the heavy breathing and screaming is louder than your alarm clock. Pittsburgh, PA.

We now use 3* and up Priceline hotels and have had no problems since.
 
Your bed has a slot machine.

You had to pay a deposit for sheets.

There's mold in the bathroom.

There's mold in the main part of the room.

The heat/AC goes out and the front desk tells you to open a window and deal with it. (Happened to a friend of mine in High Point, NC at the former Radisson Hotel-no wonder why it lost the "flag"....)
 
When you check in and they hand you a real telephone and they tell you to take it with you when you are not in the room. (This happened to us at a Ramada Inn outside of New Orleans. We couldn't get out of there fast enough).:lmao:

I had to put down a $10 deposit on the room key at the Knights Inn in St. Augustine. It was an ancient, from who knows where, PUNCH CARD KEY!!!!

We stayed at some random hotel north of Gettysburg, PA back in the late 80s where the beds had a huge crater in the middle of them. It was the only place that had vacancy as Gettysburg was having a big "to-do" with the anniversary of the Civil War battle.
 
The worst I ever had (and from some of these stories, I think I am quite lucky!!!) was the Covered Bridge Inn i n Jackson NH. In the 60's and 70's it was really nice. But we were there in like 2001, and it hadn't been updated since the 60's... The door to the room was a hollow core closet door with only a knob lock, no chain, no deadbolt, nothing! The furniture was all mismatched, but not that "charming" country inn mismatched...more like the Goodwill mismatched. The bed linens were clean enough, but certainly not "crisp".

We didn't stay. We went up the road to The Inn at Jackson which was lovely for only $20/night more and we were amazed that every time we drove by The Covered Bridge Inn the weekend that we were there, that it was packed to the gills with no vacancy.

And I am not a hotel snob. I am quite happy at a Comfort Inn, Econolodge, Motel 6, Super 8 etc... I need it reasonably clean & safe, not fancy.
 
have to flip the light switch to turn on the TV

First room key, people still in that room, 2nd room key, people still in that room.
 
You know you are in a bad motel when:

You start to sit down in a brown upholstered chair and the "flowers" in the fabric move.

The shower is molded red plastic. Seriously - I used to stay in a Holiday in in Panama City, FL with red showers when I was auditing a hospital there. I guess they got a good deal :confused3. Of course, it looked like a palace compared to the other options.

You realize there is a hole under your sink and you can see the occupants in the room behind yours. This was a motel in Kentucky. I and two coworkers missed a flight and couldn't find a better place to stay. I was rooming with the one female and we realized that this wasn't the safest or most private of rooms (the hole was the least of our issues). We decided to crash on the extra bed in the male coworker's room (my best friend from college) for a few hours and then headed for the airport about 4 hours early.

You go to get something off the breakfast bar and there is a dead roach on the top of the pancake syrup. We grabbed a few sealed breakfast bars and left.
 


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