Shower Gifts

[bucket o' butter]

I recently received an e-mail from my boss asking for money for three co-workers that are getting married or having babies this summer. We have about 50 employees. She asked for $15 from each person so we could get a "nice" gift (her words) for each person around $200 each and also buy a cake and decorations. Now, I immediately thought that was ridiculous! I spoke with one co-worker and she agreed with me completely. I think getting each of them a $50 gift and cake and decorations about be normal. What are your thoughts? I am a cheapskate at heart so maybe I'm not seeing things clearly. I can afford the $15, but I still think a $200 gift is above and beyond!

 

[java]

When I had my first child 16 years ago I worked with all men. I was so very touched by the surprise party they threw me. I got a completely impractical huge stuffed monkey from Fao Schwartz that was over $100 along with a $200 gift card and a limo home (an hour ride). It was nice and here 16 years later it still makes me smile. Was it excessive? Probably, but it was a great surprise.

I don't think $15 each is a big amount. And I wouldn't want to be the one complaining about it either. If you can afford it I wouldn't make an issue.

 

[sissy_ib]

I think $50 from 50 people is not very much at all. That is literally the bare minimum. A $200 gift is a lot but look at the number of people it is coming from? I guess that is just my way of looking at it. I think a gift of $50 from an office of 10-20 people would be appropriate. If it was just one person getting married would you all chip in $1.50 for a gift and party?

 

[powellrj]

I would love to be able to get a shower gift for $15 and be done with it. $15 per person I think is very reasonable when you consider how much you would be spending to do it on your own. On the other hand to have 50 people give someone a gift card for $50 is pretty cheap looking. That would be $1 a person!

 

[C_leen]

I think $15 per person is reasonable. All the work appears to be out of your hands too!

I have a small family & live away from them so we did not have a family shower. The work baby shower I received was absolutely touching to me.

I've come to look at a lot of this social outlay as a well-meaning prayer. It takes the sting out of my budget to think about it that way.

 

[peanut12392]

I always feel like NOT giving when someone tells me how much to give. When we do this at work it is usually something general, like any one who wants to contrubute, give the money by a certain date, with no amount stated.

 

[bdcp]

The $15 wouldn't be an issue for me, the expecting everyone to donate would be. There are several reasons I love being a Fed Gov employee and this would be one of them, EVERYTHING that involves money, donations, gifts, etc is entirely voluntary, always. No one ever assumes they're collecting x amount because they are not allowed to require anyone to participate. They give a certain amount of time, collect the money and then decide what to get for the recipient. $200 gifts from a group of 50 people is about right. I think a $50 gift from as many as 50 people would be kind of cheap.

 

[rnorwo1]

So you'd be giving $5 per person, right? I do think that is very reasonable also. I rec'd large gift cards/gifts from co-workers, and it was SO appreciated. Especially with babies, $200 does not go very far in terms of the needs.

HOWEVER, I am a supervisor, and every time something like this comes up, I ask everyone if they would like to contribute, and how much they want to contribute... it is entirely up to them and everyone's names go on the card regardless of the amount they gave or if they gave at all. If anyone has an issue with the $15, then they should be able to talk to your supervisor about it without any consequences. I am sure in this economy, there is someone who cannot afford it.

 

[ferrytale]

I also think it is reasonable, but can see your side too. We have a small office - about 25 people total 6, more than 1/2 that are sales reps that only come in occasionally. Whenever we have something that we want to collect for we ALWAYS say what we are hoping for, but that it is completely voluntary and if you can't afford it (or don't want too) it is never held against anyone. We try to get something nice for whatever we collect.

 

[kstgelais4]

I'm in agreement with the majority. $5 per person for gift/cake/decorations seems reasonable. Whilst a $50 gift would be a nice gift, from 50 people it seems like a really cheap one. As for being the recipient of a $50 gift from 50 people, I probably wouldn't blink and think it was really thoughtful, but for some reason thinking of giving only a buck for a gift rubs me wrong.

 

[tlh0726]

Asking $5 for each occasion is not unreasonable. Maybe the problem is asking for it all at once.

Where I worked, I was in charge of a few of the showers.
The way I did it was I had a card and an envelope in my office along with a food sign up sheet.
You put in what you could afford into the envelope (no one knew who gave what), signed the card, and then signed up for what you were willing to bring or contribute towards to the party (I tried to divide everything out so that cost wise it was equal among everyone - example 5 people going together to make BBQ for sandwiches - this also gave the person who didn't want to make something just contribute money towards that cost)
I usally made an announcement that I would be collecting over a 2 week period a week or two in advance.
End of the collection period I would let everyone know how much was donated, asked for ideas on what we should get them and then I would purchase the gift (gave the cash on one occasion) and a decorated cake.
Day of party everyone brought in the food.

 

[starann]

Usually at work when we have something, I give $5. I work with a group of 25 nurses and our manager asks if we want to donate. I alwasy do, although I know others who NEVER do, so while your boss may want everyone to give $15, it doesn't mean everyoen will.

This is a sore subject for me lately as I am leaving that group if nurses and they aren't planning on doing anything for me when I go (yes I know this for sure), yet every other person who left has had a party, everyone else has had a baby shower (no matter what # the child was), everyone else had a wedding shower (no matter what # marraige) and if someone was inthe hospital, a basket was sent (I have been in the hosptial 2 times and never got anything). Kinda hurts my feelings that after working with them for 6 years I get nada!