Santa Claus, Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy

[busyshrew]

I recently attended a little get together of women acquaintances. All are middle-aged moms with children ranging in age from 1 to 9 years old. One discussion led to another, and many of the women there belong to a church that doesn't approve of / believe in Santa Claus. They don't encourage their children to believe in it, and many of them have already told their young children that Santa Claus is just a pleasant tradition, a "cultural event", a "make-believe story that everyone pretends together", etc. etc. In otherwords, they are well on their way to telling their kids Santa doesn't exist.

Needless to say, our family "does Santa". DD gets a present from Santa, she leaves cookies & milk out for Santa, the whole deal!

What puzzled me the most was this; I respect that these women of course have their own beliefs. If they don't like the entire notion of Santa Claus, fine. (There was a bit of grumbling about how difficult it is to get away from that Jolly Old Elf at Christmastime). BUT. These same mothers then immediately said that they had absolutely NO PROBLEM with the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy. They put the eggs out and hide the money and everything!

Is it just me, or is that a bit confusing? I did ask, but the only answer I got was something along the lines of how Santa Claus commercializes Christmas, puts too much emphasis on presents, and takes the emphasis away from what the holiday is really about, the birth of Baby Jesus.

So now I am still confused. Any other opinions out there?

 

[soccerchick]

I don't get it. But it is okay to detract from Easter - the event that is the most holy of Christian holidays - but not Christmas?

I think they are on the anti-Santa bandwagon. It's been gaining momentum in some circles for years, though the reason I usually hear is about not lying to kids. I personally think it is sad. And lazy. I teach my kids that Santa was so happy about baby Jesus that HE started giving gifts. My kids get three gifts from Santa, just like the Biblical story. Your friends could do something like that.

I think children need to believe in things beyond themselves. They can then, when developmentally right, know that they can bring the magic into others' lives through appropriate giving, whether that is giving to people in their community or to people far away, like in Haiti.

Really, out of all three, Santa is the most plausible.

 

[Disney Doll]

I don't get it. But it is okay to detract from Easter - the event that is the most holy of Christian holidays - but not Christmas?

I think they are on the anti-Santa bandwagon. It's been gaining momentum in some circles for years, though the reason I usually hear is about not lying to kids. I personally think it is sad. And lazy. I teach my kids that Santa was so happy about baby Jesus that HE started giving gifts. My kids get three gifts from Santa, just like the Biblical story. Your friends could do something like that.

I think children need to believe in things beyond themselves. They can then, when developmentally right, know that they can bring the magic into others' lives through appropriate giving, whether that is giving to people in their community or to people far away, like in Haiti.

Really, out of all three, Santa is the most plausible.

Santa is actually loosely based on a real person....St.Nicholas. The Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy...not so much. Not that I have a problem with any of them, but if you're going to not believe in Santa, it DOES seem silly to believe theother two.

 

[Amy&Dan]

I knew someone like this. She even encouraged her kids to spill the beans to other kids to stop the lies and deceit. Which about got her teeth knocked in by another mom whose sons were beside themselves when they learned at age 6 there was no Santa. And like this person you know, this gal did the whole tooth fairy and Easter Bunny thing. Made no sense.

Honestly, she had so many weird ideas about culture and religion I gave up trying to figure her out. But had my kids been young enough to have their magic spoiled, I would have been beyond angry.

 

[luvmy3]

Maybe they think it was the Easter Bunny who was resurrected so that he could hide eggs and bring candy for the kids.

 

[busyshrew]

Interestingly enough, I was just telling DH how impressed I am that the older students at DD's school seem to really be willing and able to preserve "Santa Claus" for the littler ones. There is a lot of mixed age activity in DD's school: the older kids help out at lunch time, they are book-buddies and computer-lab helpers, safety patrol, etc. etc. You'd think at some point the older kids would spill the beans but it doesn't seem to happen! The average age to lose Santa in DD's school seems to be about 9, from what the other school moms are telling me.

Part of me felt a bit sad for the kids of these moms, they were pretty vocal about their "anti-Santy" viewpoint. I wonder what their children want? One mother talked about how she had taught her son that Santa Claus was a big pretend, etc.... but then she went on to say that her son had quietly approached her this year to ask if she wouldn't mind "pretending Santa" for him. Honestly, I almost cried when I heard that.

 

[luvmyfam444]

My nephew 3 doesn't believe - they weren't gonna do Santa anyway - I think he just asked - he knew Mickey was a person & chick-fil-A cow too so from what I understand he just assumed Santa was pretend too.

I was holding my breath this year that he was gonna tell all my kids (I have an old dd that still believes) but they coached him not to tell anyone & he didn't

What I can't imagine is how sad it'll be to be in kindergarten doing all the cute Santa crafts & think its all fake & uselss since you know - the letter you write to Santa in school - all that stuff -and then the thought of my child tell the rest of the kindergarten class - its bound to slip out....

 

[bumbershoot]

I wasn't raised with the Santa lie. Still did all the little crafts, didn't tell my friends (though I thought they were, perhaps, a bit, um, gullible), etc etc.

My mom knew me well enough to know that the idea of a strange man breaking into our house in the middle of the night would FREAK me out. So she didn't do it.

And the true mystery in our house was...how on earth did my mom buy, hide, wrap, and then set out all the presents, when she was generally broke and our house was 800 square feet and our bedrooms were directly off the living room? That mystery was bigger than Santa Claus!

DS wasn't raised with SC as reality, but he watches TV and such, and realized that other kids think he's real, so for a year he asked us to have Santa be real. This year, however, he demanded to know that the truth was that I was his Santa, so after making SURE he wanted that, I let him know that (again). And he seemed much happier to know that I was Santa.

For a year it was confusing for me, though! I still remember driving from the store as he piped up and said "I know that Santa is real"...great, kidlet...

My stepmom does NOT understand. But that's OK, I don't understand her, either! Her kids are 27, 25, and 15 now, and she still makes them say they "believe" in order to get ANY xmas presents! She says that if you don't believe, you don't get anything. (guess that's why she hasn't sent any presents to DS other than the year he turned 2...no b'day, no xmas, no nothing) She especially doesn't understand, since we go to Disneyland. But hey, I've never once said that Mickey etc is real. I don't say they aren't, either...especially not while we are AT Disneyland around all those other kids!



My mom made easter baskets, but we knew that she did it. (just like we knew that "Santa" had mom's writing, LOL...yes she played it even though she didn't do the lie)


And we did the tooth fairy...and again, the true mystery was how she did that, when I barely slept most of my childhood!


We do Yule, but on the 25th. I know, I know, silly. But it works best for us (DH and I both raised with secular xmas would feel funny not doing anything on that day).

We do things with hardboiled eggs at the vague time around easter, though we don't even do anything seasonal, let alone religious, on that day.

Pretending the bunny is real would NEVER cross my mind...although we took part in egg hunts and picnics and such, no one I was around EVER thought that the easter bunny was real. There are people who think it's REAL?



Tooth fairy...that's going to be an interesting one! Especially since DS is already missing 3 teeth but was too little when that happened. He has definitely heard about the TF from TV and such. And he gives me the same look when he asks about the TF as he did when he was asking me to reassure him that I was his Santa...

Eh, it's a goofy fun little way to commemorate tooth loss and growing up. Of course, if it starts off with FOUR teeth...jinkies. What'll he do with the next tooth?



Anyway, I know I'm not any "bandwagon". It's how I was raised and I think it was good. No lies, no worries other than, it seems, having my teeth knocked out by someone whose years of lies are found out before they wanted to end the lies? Wow, fab. No wonder I have so few "mom" friends, with THAT to worry about! I'll keep my childfree friends!

 

[ford family]

I wasn't raised with the Santa lie.

Very harsh, imo.

ford family

 

[XTinabell]

I think the logic is seriously flawed to tell your kids there is no Santa but there is an Easter bunny and Toothfairy. Sounds to me like they were told not to allow their kids to believe in Santa without really knowing why.

My dh grew up without a Santa, his family didn't want to lie to them for fear that the kids would then think they were also lying about Jesus and God. Dh said growing up he felt better/smarter than the kids his age who believed in Santa, knowing that he knew the truth and they didn't.

While I don't judge, people can choose to have their own Christmas traditions, I personally think that if you teach your child correctly about Jesus and God I can't see why there is no room to allow your children to exercise their imaginations. Santa adds that bit of magic to Christmas that warms everyone's hearts, I see no wrong with that.

 

[luvsJack]

We do it all. The religious aspects of Easter and Christmas and the fun aspects of both. I don't thing that either takes away from the other unless you let it.

Now, I do know churches that do not believe in doing anything on these holidays except religious celebrations. For instance, our church has an egg hunt for the children; this other church does not (when the church went to the pastor and asked he would not allow it). But for even these churches its both Santa and the Easter Bunny they leave out.

They don't have an issue with the Tooth Fairy because losing your teeth isn't a religious event.


But, I also have a friend that her religion doesn't believe in any of it because of the magic issue. They don't have anything to do with anything that has magic as a part of it.


So, actually, I haven't begun to answer you question. But I have never really heard of anyone doing one mythical person/creature but allowing belief in the other.

 

[Eeyore'sthebest]

I don't understand how a religion would disallow Santa but allow the EB. Like LuvsJack said, the tooth fairy is not religious so that doesn't bother me.

But in our church (Roman Catholic), Easter is much more holy than Christmas.
And my DD knows the full religious aspect of Christmas and Easter. She could tell you the bible stories better than me. She knows the Santa and the EB and extras but not the reason for the holiday.

 

[wdwfan16]

To me it is an all or nothing thing. Why is Easter Bunny OK at Easter but Santa not OK at Christmas?

 

[kristilew]

Our pastor has no problem with Santa - that's just one more guy giving gifts to celebrate the Greatest Gift ever given. But boy does he hate the Easter bunny. He has this whole line about kids coming to think that on Easter morning, Jesus hops into your house and gives you candy.

Tooth Fairy lasted at our house till the night a tooth came out and 11pm and the tooth fairy hadn't been to the bank.

As for EB, I asked DD, do you really think a giant rabbit brings you a basket? DD: It's you??? Me: yes, I'm sorry. DD: Has it always been you? Me: No, dear, some years it was a giant bunny.

The lady you are talking about, OP, seems a little odd to me. But to each their own....

 

[disneyjunkie]

No wonder I have so few "mom" friends, with THAT to worry about! I'll keep my childfree friends!

Your friends may decide to have children one day. If you want a quick way to get rid of them, share a few of your child birth stories.

 

[declansdad]

I wasn't raised with the Santa lie.

Santa is not a lie; Santa exists in many forms. Saying it is a lie seems a bit harsh.

 

[busyshrew]

Our pastor has no problem with Santa - that's just one more guy giving gifts to celebrate the Greatest Gift ever given. But boy does he hate the Easter bunny. He has this whole line about kids coming to think that on Easter morning, Jesus hops into your house and gives you candy.

Tooth Fairy lasted at our house till the night a tooth came out and 11pm and the tooth fairy hadn't been to the bank.

As for EB, I asked DD, do you really think a giant rabbit brings you a basket? DD: It's you??? Me: yes, I'm sorry. DD: Has it always been you? Me: No, dear, some years it was a giant bunny.

The lady you are talking about, OP, seems a little odd to me. But to each their own....

Kristilew, thank you for the good laugh!

And yes, you will think it strange I am sure, but my DD actually does believe that there is an Easter bunny who hops around and delivers eggs to boys and girls. We read her a story (can't remember the title) about a little rabbit who becomes a mummy-bunny, trains her kittens to be self-sufficient and then goes off to become an "Easter bunny" helper. It's cute. So now DD thinks that the "big Easter Bunny" has dozens and dozens of little bunny helpers to hide eggs the night before. To make it even worse, we have a cat door in our house, and she's convinced that the Easter bunny sneaks into the house at night via that cat door.

Now interestingly enough, DD doesn't believe for one second that the Santas in the malls are the real deal. She asked for an explanation of why they were all different looking when she was 4, so we told her that the real Santa is too busy and needs to have lots of helpers to make children happy. Which is fine by her - but now NO WAY will she sit on some strange guy's lap for a picture, especially when that guy is not the real Santa!

 

[luvsJack]

Our pastor has no problem with Santa - that's just one more guy giving gifts to celebrate the Greatest Gift ever given. But boy does he hate the Easter bunny. He has this whole line about kids coming to think that on Easter morning, Jesus hops into your house and gives you candy.
Tooth Fairy lasted at our house till the night a tooth came out and 11pm and the tooth fairy hadn't been to the bank.

As for EB, I asked DD, do you really think a giant rabbit brings you a basket? DD: It's you??? Me: yes, I'm sorry. DD: Has it always been you? Me: No, dear, some years it was a giant bunny.

The lady you are talking about, OP, seems a little odd to me. But to each their own....

I am sorry but that just put a hilarious picture in my head.

But I do see where the EB could be more of an issue to the church than Santa. I think that more people have pushed aside the true meaning of Easter for egg hunts and EB than have pushed aside the meaning of Christmas for Santa. Even for church goes, when you have small kids that want to get up and get their basket and hunt the egss; its hard to make that early morning service or any service for that matter! So its really easy to kind of skip over the real reason for celebrating Easter.

 

[islandmum]

I think they are on the anti-Santa bandwagon. It's been gaining momentum in some circles for years, though the reason I usually hear is about not lying to kids. I personally think it is sad. And lazy. .

ITA - you know you are only a kiddie for a little time in your life, that magical time where you dont have to worry about work, exams, bills, stress etc ....

All this rubbish about parents not wanting to lie to their kids .... sorry but thats a cop out for their own agenda really, and please dont tell me they never EVER tell a lie to their kids. Give the kids a a break, let them have a little magic in their lives, theres nothing more wonderful than seeing your 5 year old come screaming into the living room on Christmas morning to find Santa's been there!

Theres plenty of time for kids to learn about truth, fiction, lies etc, let them have some FUN!

sheesh, some people take the fun out of everything for kids!

I'd rather my kids remember having a magic childhood than think they were brought up always being told the absoloute truth by their parents. We do Santa, tooth fairy and the Easter Bunny until they find out its really us from someone else no doubt. Doesnt harm them one bit.

 

[BellvilleDad]

Santa is not a lie; Santa exists in many forms. Saying it is a lie seems a bit harsh.