SAHM's going back to work

[RadioNate]

it's my first CB main post so be nice.

I've been primarily a stay at home mom for nearly 4 years. I've done some freelance work at home stuff and worked nights/weekends as a manager at TDS.

I have an oppertunity to go back to work FT. It was originally a M-W-F position which was perfect however they now want someone 5 days a week. DS already goes to preschool 3 mornings a week. DS would continue day care at his preschool.

Have any of you returned to the workplace after being home with day care age kids? How was their transition to FT day care? How was yours?

Do you regret your choice?

Money isn't a huge factor. More is always nice but the extra I bring home would likely go toward paying off the car we don't own and building up our savings.

Is being a FT working mom harder, easier or just different than staying home?

 

[mom2grace]

I am a SAHM who works part-time around my husband's schedule and right now we need my income, my kids go to preschool twice a week, but not daycare.

While I am a HUGE proponent of SAHM's, I think you should trust your gut.

But remember, you will never get these years back!

I think it's just different, but I also think when you work full-time and try to parent full-time, everything suffers!

 

[RNMOM]

I stayed home until my boys were 4 and just 2. I really needed to return or face retraining and we needed the money.

I regret it very much now. To be honest, when I moved where we live now 7 years ago, I took the chance and went part time for the first time in 8 years. I also took the evening/weekend and now night shifts and love it.

So, between 4 and 2 and 12 and 10 my kids were in full time daycare/camps. I would not do it again if I had to do it over again. They had lots of time with their Dad and I in evenings and weekends but we really missed out on having a more relaxed life. We missed out having our kids playing with kids we knew better than whoever was at dc/camp that day. I ran into some really questionable behaviors when I arrived to pick kids up and was glad it was not my kid doing it. They also are not as close as they would have been if they had to play together.

Financially, we are better off with me working less than half time than when I worked full time and payed for child care. The many thousands for that, the travel and uniforms were big expenses and we ate out more too.

If you are happy as you are, your children would really benefit from you caring for them yourself. I honestly believe that and wish I could get those years back for myself.

 

[mudnuri]

I'm not a big SAHM or a Working mom person. I really believe whats best for your family is whats best. That said.

When DD was 8 weeks old I went back to work part time. My aunt, how had a home daycare with 3 kids watched her.

I continued this until DD2 was born. At that time, DH had just sold a business, and wanted to take time off. he stayed home with a newborn and a 15 month old (yup, he did it well too!)

When DD's were 3 and 4, DH's company wasnt doing very well. It was either I worked part time, or DH did. I ended up waitressing part time. They were use to not having dad at home till dinner, I didnt want them to only see him on weekends, which would have happened if he took on another job.

When my oldest was in kindergarten, I took my current job as Recreation Director for the Town we live in. This is a part time position from October to April and a 50 hour week from May thru September.

This will be my last summer with this job! My kids spent 8 weeks at YMCA Daycamp this year. While they loved that part of it, we were unable to do anything as a family, other than 1/2 day trips. Due to my position, I must be available should anything go wrong...which of course it does justas you head out of town.

Now, they are in school full time, DH is owner of yet another business, and I am starting a new job next week. The reason, $$ (isnt it always!). Mondays, he will be home with them, Tuesdays I will, and Wed/Thurs/Fri they will be at the Y afterschool program until 530-6 when he gets them. My current job I will continue through budget season. but its only 20 hours so I can do that easily while they are in school

This puts us at a weird position, as Dh will be like a single parent m/w/th/f nights.

However, for our family, this is what is the best thing to do. In the end, we will be better than if I stayed in this job only.

Even though Im now going to be gone nights, it's nothing new to them, usually in the winter tues/thurs nights I have to run a ski tow, so I'm gone 6-930, and mon/wed theres meetings etc. I only saw them on Friday nights etc.

The big difference for them will be they wont take the bus home...
The big difference as us for a family? The stress of loans etc.. will be gone thats our plan anyway!

Brandy