Saddam Unimpressed By G.o.p. Victory Margin

[fklhou]

SADDAM UNIMPRESSED BY G.O.P. VICTORY MARGIN

Fell Far Short of 100%, Iraqi Strongman Says

Iraqi strongman Saddam Hussein attempted to pour cold water on G.O.P. election victories last night, saying in an interview this morning that the Republicans’ margin of victory fell far short of the 100% necessary to be considered a true mandate.

“Everyone’s crowing about what a big win this was for Bush,” Saddam told reporters in Baghdad. “One hundred percent is big. These numbers are pathetic.”

Saddam singled out Gov. Jeb Bush’s “squeaker” of a victory in Florida as a striking blow to brother George W. Bush’s prestige.

“Jeb’s victory margin was, what, thirteen percent?” Saddam said. “Ouch! That’s nowhere near one hundred percent.”

The Iraqi strongman said that the Republicans’ retaking of control in the U.S. Senate was nothing to brag about, either, since they failed to take all one hundred seats.

“I think the G.O.P has got to do some real soul-searching this morning to try to figure out what went wrong,” Saddam said.

In Washington, White House press secretary Ari Fleischer offered a tart response to Saddam’s disparaging of the Bush team’s victory margin, calling the Iraqi strongman’s comments “really jerky.”

“While I hate to argue with a democracy ‘expert’ like Saddam Hussein,” Mr. Fleischer said, “I should remind him that in America, unlike Iraq, we don’t have the luxury of running unopposed.”

“They were running against Tom Daschle,” Saddam shot back. “Same thing.”

In other Election Day news, Bush twins Jenna and Barbara Bush released a statement today attempting to explain why they were nowhere in evidence at the Bush victory celebration in Florida last night.

“Tuesday was Election Night,” the Bush twins’ statement read. “However, it was also Ladies’ Night.”

****Borowotiz Reports****

 

[Goofyposter]

“While I hate to argue with a democracy ‘expert’ like Saddam Hussein,” Mr. Fleischer said

LOL!!!

 

[tedsmom]

And we should care about his opinion why????

 

[Carl]

Well, if Republicans were the ONLY ones running, and you got SHOT if you didn't vote for them, I suspect they would have gotten 100% just like Saddam.

 

[caitycaity]

"And we should care about his opinion why????"

this is satire -- it's a joke. it's not real.

 

[Rexfan]

It's about the only thing I have to laugh at today, being a depressed, die-hard Democrat.

 

[Briar Rose 7457]

sad commentary on the state of affairs in this country that people can't recognize satire when they read it.

 

[caitycaity]

i am guessing that people who didn't get that it was satire didn't read this sentence:

"“Tuesday was Election Night,” the Bush twins’ statement read. “However, it was also Ladies’ Night.”"

 

[tedsmom]

I was responding to the satire with sarcasm. I guess everybody who thought I missed the satire missed the sarcasm.

 

[fklhou]

This is satire. It is not real. It may or nor be funny depending on your mood and/or political beliefs.

 

[JulesMom]

So true, Carl