RSVP and ordering food

[powellrj]

I'm not sure how the topic turned to not expecting responses for open houses. Based on the original post, that's not what the OP is having; she seems to be holding an invitation-only party with a specific guest list.

I posted it because I have never been invited to a graduation party that was an invitation only event. Only open houses so people may not be responding because they didn't realize it wasn't an open house and that they needed to respond.

 

[crisi]

I posted it because I have never been invited to a graduation party that was an invitation only event. Only open houses so people may not be responding because they didn't realize it wasn't an open house and that they needed to respond.

Yeah, my assumption with a graduation party is that the format is open house. So unless the invitation was pretty specific to being something more formal, I'd assume its a "drop in - there will be food" thing. Not a "dinner served at 5pm" thing. However, its completely probable that they are more formal in other parts of the country or here in different circles of people.

And, around here, the first shift is relatives, neighbors and friends of your parents. The kids all start doing the circuits of each others homes starting around 7 or so and going until midnight or later - so you won't have leftovers and you won't have enough food - they just keep eating their way through open houses like locust until they are done.

 

[VAN]

I also find it frustrating when people don't RSVP when asked ... especially a wedding where you are charged by the caterer per person.

I once saw on one of those wedding shows on TV a bride that hired security to keep out anyone who showed up that hadn't RSVP'd their attendance. She was paying big-bucks per plate and arranged for seating/food for only those who RSVP'd. It was hilarious because, of course, it was a large group of relatives that were trying to get in!!! LOL!!!!

A bit extreme - but, really, how hard is it to check a box and put the dang card in the mail!!!!

I think the real problem is that they don't want to commit in case something "better" comes along.

 

[kamik86]

I also find it frustrating when people don't RSVP when asked ... especially a wedding where you are charged by the caterer per person.

I once saw on one of those wedding shows on TV a bride that hired security to keep out anyone who showed up that hadn't RSVP'd their attendance. She was paying big-bucks per plate and arranged for seating/food for only those who RSVP'd. It was hilarious because, of course, it was a large group of relatives that were trying to get in!!! LOL!!!!

A bit extreme - but, really, how hard is it to check a box and put the dang card in the mail!!!!

I think the real problem is that they don't want to commit in case something "better" comes along.

Lol I had only 50 people invited to my wedding and we still had to call a bunch. My DH's family well I have no idea what happened to his mom and him (meaning how they turned out good with that family) but the rest have no class and brought extras, didn't RSVP, RSVPd then didn't come etc.

My family was better. The aunts and uncles all RSVPd the ones that didn't were the close people that figured I knew they were coming (like my sister). Her kids were in the wedding party so she didn't know she had to send it back!!

We did call everyone though because with only 50 people that isn't too many calls since everyone was in at least groups of 2 and as many as 5.

 

[beansmom]

RSVP stands for Respondez-vous, s'il vous plait - ultimately, "please respond". With formal invitations, RSVP cards are included so the invitees can let the hosts know whether or not they're coming. When the invitation is less formal, giving a phone number and e-mail address and asking for a response makes sense and is proper etiquette.

YES!!! I was shocked at how many people assumed they just did not have to respond to our rehearsal dinner invitation. At $45 per person, an accurate headcount was important. I sent an email reminder and if still no response, I struck their name off the attendees list.

 

[kaytieeldr]

I posted it because I have never been invited to a graduation party that was an invitation only event. Only open houses so people may not be responding because they didn't realize it wasn't an open house and that they needed to respond.

Understood - but I reread the original post before I wrote that to make sure I wasn't missing something. The OP was/is having a party with a fixed number of guests, not an open house. Different strokes for different folks and all; while I don't mind attending an open house, I'm not comfortable throwing one.