Roommate Relations

[glendalais]

I'm not sure if this is in the right forum, since it sorta straddles the topics of two seperate forums.

I just received my notification from Housing Operations as to who my roommate would be. I've been in contact with him, and he seems like a nice guy. However, I'm conflicted as to how or if I should tell him that I'm gay.

He's from a part of the US that I'm fairly sure doesn't hold homosexuality in very high regard.

I don't want to cause a uncomfortable situation right after I met him thru e-mail, but at the same time, it seems downright mean to just not broach the topic and wait until he moves in and shock him there (and if that shock manifests itself as homophobic behaviours, there are of course, other issues mostly related to my personal safety). If it's an issue for him, I should give him the chance to find another roommate, eh?

Just wanted to put that out there and see if I could get some opinions.

 

[taigirl87]

can i ask where he is from?

 

[glendalais]

can i ask where he is from?

To ensure his privacy, I won't say where exactly, but I will say he's from an area inside the Bible Belt.

 

[_frazzle]

I say go for it. I have met countless gay CPs so if he turns out to be homophobic or not too accepting, then I don't think this is the right place for him to begin with.

 

[Jelliebean]

I'm not sure if this is in the right forum, since it sorta straddles the topics of two seperate forums.

I just received my notification from Housing Operations as to who my roommate would be. I've been in contact with him, and he seems like a nice guy. However, I'm conflicted as to how or if I should tell him that I'm gay.

He's from a part of the US that I'm fairly sure doesn't hold homosexuality in very high regard.

I don't want to cause a uncomfortable situation right after I met him thru e-mail, but at the same time, it seems downright mean to just not broach the topic and wait until he moves in and shock him there (and if that shock manifests itself as homophobic behaviours, there are of course, other issues mostly related to my personal safety). If it's an issue for him, I should give him the chance to find another roommate, eh?

Just wanted to put that out there and see if I could get some opinions.

I think if you're worried about it, then you should say something. I think I'd rather have an uncomfortable email situation than an uncomfortable situation inside your apartment, you know? Not saying he is going to react adversely or anything, but if you're nervous about it, like I said, I don't think you should keep it to yourself

 

[SiSiMonique2009]

I think I live in the Bible belt since I'm from Alabama but I don't know lol But here it seems to be our parents who have a problem with homosexuality than we do. Even though my school is in the south its very diverse with all different types of people and everyone from our generation seems to be really open minded! Sometimes people from around where I'm from can react kind of differently towards people but they are usually ignorant or like I said from and older generation where things where different. I guess through all this I'm trying to say give him the benefit of the doubt because like me he may have totally different views than his parents.

 

[reborn120]

Honestly, I do have a problem with homosexuality (and live outside of the Bible belt) but I love all people. I think you should definitely tell your roommate. It would be unfair if you did not. For your comfort and his it is best to be open about it. Personally, if my roommate was homosexual i would not want to room with them. This is just my opinion on the subject, which everyone is entitled to. I wish you luck in making this tough decision.

 

[Simple_Motions]

I'm also homosexual. I think you should just tell him. A lot of people are accepting of homosexuality nowadays. But in case there is a problem, like you said personal safety, it would be better for him to know before hand. But im pretty sure there are A LOT of gay people in Disney. I saw a vlog once that said "IF YOU DONT LIKE HOMOSEXUALS DONT GO TO DISNEY". I hope all goes well for you!

(by the way! if you have facebook, feel free to add me! Its Violet Martin...i'll be the one with green hair )

 

[Berlioz70]

We have a saying at Disney... "assumed gay until proven to be straight." It's the complete opposite than you'd find anywhere else!

 

[jellipop]

Well if he plans in working in Disney he better not be a homophobe! Disney doesnt have a Gay Days of Disney for nothing!

 

[taigirl87]

I think if you're worried about it, then you should say something. I think I'd rather have an uncomfortable email situation than an uncomfortable situation inside your apartment, you know? Not saying he is going to react adversely or anything, but if you're nervous about it, like I said, I don't think you should keep it to yourself

I agree on that its better to get it done and over with now when you can take care of it, instead of having to pay money to change apts or something.

To ensure his privacy, I won't say where exactly, but I will say he's from an area inside the Bible Belt.

ah okay. thanks cuz it would make sense to me now i guess.

I think I live in the Bible belt since I'm from Alabama but I don't know lol But here it seems to be our parents who have a problem with homosexuality than we do. Even though my school is in the south its very diverse with all different types of people and everyone from our generation seems to be really open minded! Sometimes people from around where I'm from can react kind of differently towards people but they are usually ignorant or like I said from and older generation where things where different. I guess through all this I'm trying to say give him the benefit of the doubt because like me he may have totally different views than his parents.

i agree with that, my parents are a little more closed to homosexuality, but for me its something that is around me and i deal with it. i have a few guy friends who are gay and i dont have a problem with it, but i am a girl though. lol

We have a saying at Disney... "assumed gay until proven to be straight." It's the complete opposite than you'd find anywhere else!

ha ha ha, that is so true i think!

 

[Simple_Motions]

Well if he plans in working in Disney he better not be a homophobe! Disney doesnt have a Gay Days of Disney for nothing!

Exactly!

 

[GiggleGoddess]

I have a roomie this year whose a lesbian but she didn't figure it out until this semester. I'm cool with it, but it was a bit awkward when I was trying to do homework with them making out behind me. I would definitely give your roomie a call/email and let him know this before you get there just so you guys can work it out before hand and save yourself potential difficulties.

 

[tink774]

I'm cool with it, but it was a bit awkward when I was trying to do homework with them making out behind me.

Wow, that's awkward no matter what your roommate's orientation! Did you mention feeling uncomfortable with this to them? I am by no means homophobic, but I would have felt compelled to say something to them.

Anyway, back to the original topic. I definitely think it's something you should let him know BEFORE you move in together. He may surprise you and not have a problem with it, and then you can feel much more at ease as you prepare to move in. And if he does feel uncomfortable with it, I hope that he will at least handle the situation with maturity so as not to cause any problems for you.

Best of luck!

 

[PrincessJordynx]

ugh, i can't stand people who are so ignorant to the point where it affects those around them. if someone has a problem with you because who you choose to like they can go die. im sorry. hell more power to lesbians, more men out there for me haha jk. but seriously i say you tell him for you, not for him. if it were me i wouldnt want to live with a homophobe. there is no reason you should have to feel ashamed for yourself and that would be the issue. if he has a problem he can either deal or bounce.

 

[MaryPoppins86]

ugh, i can't stand people who are so ignorant to the point where it affects those around them. if someone has a problem with you because who you choose to like they can go die. im sorry. hell more power to lesbians, more men out there for me haha jk. but seriously i say you tell him for you, not for him. if it were me i wouldnt want to live with a homophobe. there is no reason you should have to feel ashamed for yourself and that would be the issue. if he has a problem he can either deal or bounce.

well said!

 

[glendalais]

Well, he seems fine with it, so crisis averted.

It's not that I'm embarrased of who I am (I certainly am not), I just don't want to cause a major issue after we've moved in.

After a few failed relationships here at the DLR (like WDW, DLR also has a very large proportion of GLBT CMs compared to other similarly sized workplaces), I follow the 3D rule (Don't Date Disney), so there shouldn't be that issue, at least from my end.

 

[savannahjean85]

I would tell him to just get it out of the way now, in case he is not comfortable with it and you can switch room mates.


Just to let you know that if you join the facebook group for the Fall College Program 2009 they had a thread on the discussion board for GLBT.

 

[SyracuseWolvrine]

I follow the 3D rule (Don't Date Disney), so there shouldn't be that issue, at least from my end.

I think I heard that rule first expressed on another message board ... I'm not sure it's quite as necessary here at WDW as it may be at DLR ... I think the main issues arise when you're dating someone you work with on a daily basis. Dating your immediate co-workers is just generally not a good idea*

If you're dating someone outside your immediate area, then it's a lot harder for your co-workers to spread rumors, and it's a lot harder for a failed relationship to cause problems at work.

Granted, this IS Disney, and people love to tell stories. Gossip tends to fly pretty quickly, especially if you work in a small/close-knit area.

(* i have to admit, I'm being somewhat hypocritical in saying this, as I'm dating a co-worker at the moment. However, we agreed before we started dating that, no matter what happens, the personal life stays backstage, and will not interfere with our being able to work together)

 

[MaryPoppins86]

Well, he seems fine with it, so crisis averted.

glad to hear that this issue has been resolved.