"Redshirting" for Kindergarten?

[Sydnie]

My older son's birthday is at the beginning of July (he just turned 3).

As such I was expecting him to start Kindergarten about a month after his 5th birthday.

However everyone and their brother has been asking me if I am going to wait a year and start him when he is 6. Now this just boggles my mind because when I was in school many kids didn't turn 5 until October or November, so a July birthday to me seems like he'd be more than old enough to start Kindergarten. I guess though it's really the trend to hold back summer babies now, especially boys.

In my son's case we're leaning towards send him at 5 regardless, he's already started "reading" and sounding out and spelling words. I can only imagine he will be bored to tears if we wait three more years!

But I don't know-I hate the idea that he will be over a year younger than some of the kids if it's really that common to hold back now.

What are your thoughts on the whole phenomenon?

 

[DisneyCowgirl]

My older son's birthday is at the beginning of July (he just turned 3).

As such I was expecting him to start Kindergarten about a month after his 5th birthday.

However everyone and their brother has been asking me if I am going to wait a year and start him when he is 6. Now this just boggles my mind because when I was in school many kids didn't turn 5 until October or November, so a July birthday to me seems like he'd be more than old enough to start Kindergarten. I guess though it's really the trend to hold back summer babies now, especially boys.

In my son's case we're leaning towards send him at 5 regardless, he's already started "reading" and sounding out and spelling words. I can only imagine he will be bored to tears if we wait three more years!

But I don't know-I hate the idea that he will be over a year younger than some of the kids if it's really that common to hold back now.

What are your thoughts on the whole phenomenon?

Every kid is different, so my advice (assuming you're going to public school and can actually wait) is to make the decision when it is closer to time.

Here in Houston, several of the private schools are pushing the age for starting kindergarten back to 5 by July 1, and one school has even said by some time in April!

 

[Sydnie]

He's going to a private school.

He turns 5 on July 5th, so I guess in Houston he would be forced to stay back a year!

Of course we are in CA which has one of the latest cut-offs, December 2nd. They are moving it back to September 1 though.

The only reason I am thinking about it at all now if it determines when/how often he goes to preschool.

 

[Conservative Hippie]

My daughter's birthday is in September, so she will turn 6 just a few weeks after starting Kindergarten, which I think is ridiculous. I'm planning to homeschool her, away, so we will start making decisions on what to do next summer, when she is 4 (and will be 5 in September).

 

[PatsMom]

My daughter is a July birthday and I never considered holding her back a year. She was ready to go and had done great in pre-school. I talked to her pre-school teachers and they agreed she was ready for kindergarten. Then I asked about doing a second year of kindergarten but when she was tested the results came back as definitely ready for first grade.

It really depends on the child. I would talk to his current pre-school teachers and see what they think. Some parents do the hold back for athletics - they want their boys to be bigger and stronger at a younger age so they will hopefully excel at some sport and get college scholarships. I don't agree with this approach at all. But there is nothing wrong with delaying a child who is not socially or academically ready for a structured learning situation IMHO.

 

[Snowflakey]

I waited on both my DD's. At their school you had to turn 5 BEFORE Sept. 1 and both my DD's bdays were shortly thereafter so even though I could of had them tested to begin "early" I decided to let them be a kid another year.

I wish I didn't Even though everything went just fine, it seemed as though my DD's were more matured then those in their class. I highly doubt one year makes that much of a difference but at our school it seemed to. Both DD's friends were a year ahead of them.

By all means, if your son is ready then I say do it!

 

[Malibustyle23]

What about pre-k? Is it offered and will he be attending that?

 

[Geoff_M]

There's two things to consider: 1) his mental readiness, and 2) his emotional/social readiness. One of our sons was born in mid-May. At 5 he was more than ready in terms of language, math, and age-appropriate reading skills, but this emotional/social skills were a bit lagging. We opted to wait a year before starting him in Kindergarten. It was a great move. He wasn't bored when he started school and he's always enjoyed school. This year he starts middle school. Instead of him being one of the younger kids in his grade, he's instead one of the oldest. I think that's helped him in terms of grades and maturity.

It's a personal decision, but we've always shook our heads when friends have kids that have tested at "young five" levels but instead they opt to go ahead and put them in Kindergarten. It seems that some people feel that waiting a year is tantamount to admitting that something's "wrong" with their child. Our philosophy is "What's the rush? Why are you trying to hurry your kid out the door?"

 

[JKMJ441724]

things that I considered before I sent my kids...

If you wait, they will be (one of) the oldest in their class. So all their friends will be riding with your child (you know, the one you taught to drive.

and then when they go off to college, they are a year older (and hopefully more mature) and more able to deal with the pressures of living alone.

 

[HelenePA]

Sept 1 is the cut off here.. my dd's bday is Aug 22... at the school request we held her back they said it would be better due to maturity issues.. well now I wish I would have pushed harder for her to go... she's going into 3rd and is BORED in school.. she has nothing but 100% on her report cards. Her teacher had to keep her busy last year but teaching her algebra during study times in second grade. She begs me to go to school in the summer.

 

[DisneySarah80]

Its not a matter of how he will handle Kindergarten, its a matter of if he will be mature enough when he hits high school, for example. To me, its a great advantage to be older and more mature - Able to handle thing as well or better than his peers.
My youngest DDs birthday is at the end of September, and though she started talking way younger than most other kids in the neighborhood, and knows her numbers, and some words and such, we are holding her back the one year (She will be 5 this coming Sept and will be going into her final year of pre-k). She will be driving before everyone rather than way after, though I don't know if thats a good thing!!!

Good luck with your decision - Its a personal decision that every parents has to make for themselves.

 

[MomofKatie]

I have a September birthday DD. Our schools had a 10/15 cutoff when she started Kindergarten. Many of her preschool friends' parents asked us the same thing- are you going to hold her out a year so she can be bigger and more mature to start Kindergarten? DD was very petite at that age.

We opted to send her to K before her 5th birthday- best decision we could have made! She was already reading by the time she started school that fall- she was a little bored with Kindergarten, even starting young- I can't imagine how frustrated and uninspired she would have been if she was almost 6 when she started.

Every parent must evaluate their own summer or fall birthday child and make the decision to start or hold. IMO, though, too many choose to hold when the child would do perfectly well starting young. Again, JMO, but to me, it is another example of overprotective, helicopter parenting.

 

[monorailsilver]

My ds is a September birthday & our cut off is Dec. 31st.

He went to K when he was 4 & turned 5 a few weeks into it. I started reading more and more about people holding their kids back when I he was in K & I never thought to hold him back. He was in the age to go so why should I hold him back was in my eyes.

I went to a play group with a girl who has a son a week or 2 older then my son. They were about 2 then & she said she was holding him back because he wasn't ready. Um..he is 2, my son the same age is not ready for K at age 2.

I guess if there was some form of developental issues I might consider holding him back but there wasn't. He reads & does really well in math (he is going into 3rd grade).

He goes to school with a few kids who are older then him.

A-is born the same year as him but in May. He has problems with reading & concentraing.

B-is born the year before him in November so basically B is 10 months older then him. B goes to a tutor for reading & math & is slower in alot of subjects.

C-is born the year before him also in November. C has a tendency to cry if 3 boys are playing & he doesn't like what is being done or how it is being played. Heck I had him & 2 other boys over for a play date & C threw my Wii remote because he didn't like one of the other boys begging for the remote. He also had a fit because the 3 boys were on a scooter & 2 bikes & he said no one wanted to play with him. Um..take turns, has he never heard of taking turns?

So those 3 boys are older then my son & they all have some sort of problem. So even holding the kids back a year didn't help in 2 of those cases.

 

[mjantz]

Both of my kids have late summer birthdays. We decided to redshirt my son (the oldest) & it was the right decision for him. He entered kindergarten ready & mature for the class. He's a bright kid but struggles a bit & I think he'd be struggling more if he was a year ahead. For my DD we started her right after she turned 5 & it was the right decision. Even now she's well ahead of her peers & I can only imagine her boredom if she was a year behind.
Every kid is different. My only advice, as a teacher, is that many younger kids get through K fine but 1st grade they start to struggle a bit. I discussed with a mom earlier this year about the possibility of holding back her child in K. I said no but told her to be prepared for him possibly being held back as a 1st grader.

 

[MickeyManiac]

My DS's birthday is August 10th. We started him as he made the deadline by 2 weeks. Like your son, he was reading and academically very ready to start school. Socially was quite a bit harder. He struggled the first couple of months of preschool the worst. Kindergarten wasn't too bad. The biggest issue was his seperation anxiety. As he matured he was fine. He had no problems with the transition to middle school and did very well.

Fast forward to high school and that darn age thing popped back up. He only turned 15 two weeks before his sophomore year. All of his friends were turning 16 and starting to date and get their driver permits and he had to wait until the end of the next summer. It was hard at the time, but he got through it. It has also been a bit challenging with high school baseball (his passion). He has to work a little harder to keep up with the boys that are almost a year older than him.

Do I regret starting him? Not really! Does he regret it? Not at all! Now I have a well adjusted senior in HS with a 3.9 GPA that will graduate at 17.

The one mistake I feel we made was letting him (and us) use it as an excuse when something wasn't going right. Saying things like "you are a lot younger than they are", etc. If I had it to do over again I would not focus on him being younger and try not to bring it up.

 

[dimimi]

It is very common where I have lived (Pennsylvania and Ohio) to hold back a summer birthday...especially if it is a boy or a very shy child. Believe it or not, some hold the kids back to they excel at sports! Whichever you decide, she will be one of the youngest. So, that means the last to get a driver's license, etc. (Not the end of the world, but it will be important to her.)

However, I have seen many kids held back that should have been sent and kids that were sent that should have been held back. (I have taught school for a long time.)

I would assume your child would be ready and then see what the school says when you go to enroll her. Schools typically do a readiness test and then you will see their recommendations.

You could also send her and then if she struggles through Kindergarten, have her repeat kindergarten. Just make sure she realizes she is NOT being held back, but that she just wasn't ready. Not that you asked my opinion, but if she is ready socially and academically, I would send her!

 

[Bren's Mom]

Op, I'm of the same mind you are. My ds was turning 5 last year on Sept 1. He started school on August 28th (I think it was) when he was 4, and turned 5 a few days later. He had a great K year. He was in preschool for a full year, full time prior to that. They felt he was ready. So far so good!

 

[Michelle67]

It really is getting more and more common to have kids wait a year if they are close to the cutoff. I know quite a few people who have chosen to wait a year to send their kids to school.

Both of my younger kids are August babies, and the cutoff in my state is the end of August. I didn't choose to hold either of them back a year, but sometimes things pop up that make it really evident that they are younger than many others in their classes. There are times when I wish I had gone ahead and waited with my son. He is extremely smart and has no problem with the learning end of things, but he struggles with social interaction, and I think it might have been better for him to have had another year to develop emotionally.

So while I agree that a child who is already reading before school may sometimes be bored if they wait an extra year (I had a very bright November baby who had no choice since she missed the cutoff, and often already knew things the class was learning), there are also ways for teachers to challenge an academically advanced child. I think it is much easier on teachers and children alike if a child needs an extra challenge thrown their way sometimes, rather than finding the emotional and social issues extra challenging, kwim? I guess I would just urge you to make sure you're paying attention to his emotional/social readiness as well as his obvious intelligence. You don't want your child struggling on either side of the coin, and sometimes a year can make a huge difference.

Best wishes, whatever you decide.

 

[LisaNJ25]

nope.. 4 kids here and never held them back from kindergarten. Out cut off date is 10/1.. My kids are 9/1. 8/19, 8/26 and 10/3 ( when my son with the 10/3 birthday started school cutoff was 10/15)

So every one either turned 2 weeks or less of school starting or after school started.

I personally would never hold back if hey make the cutoff. My oldest child (with the 10/3 birthday) we did hold back when he was in 3rd grade for issues he was having. I would not of done anything different.

 

[NewCrew42]

Here are a few things to think about.

My DS who just turned 16 the end of May has had a few issues that didn't occur to me when he was younger. The cut-off date here is Sept. 15. It never occured to me that I would be parenting one of the youngest children in my child's class.

DS was reading chapter books in kindergarten. Our private school had a class called transition you could take between kindergarten and 1st grade. DS was not recommended for it and I didn't think of even sending him since he was one of the more advanced kids in his grade.

In 8th grade, I would have given anything for him to go back and be in transition.

For sports, the other guys in our grade had hit puberty and had a huge growth spurt. Most of the guys who were the starting players were at least 1 year older than my son. Not because they made poor grades, but because their parents choose to send them to school later. Had we sent our child to transition class, he would have started in sports beginning in 8th grade. He did start mid season 9th grade after his growth spurt.

In middle school and upper elementary even in high school, we see were DS was not as mature as his peers.

This year, there were only two BOYS in his class of 135 who turned 16 after him. This meant the majority of boys were driving. So when DS asked a girl to the fall dance, winter formal, and spring formal, he couldn't drive his date who was already 16. Luckily, the girls were very sweet and drove them, but I am just saying it was hard for DS.

As a tenth grader, DS has already scored a 32 on the ACT. We are hoping his score improves to open opportunities to him across the country. If he had one more year, he might have even more opportunities. I was recently asked by the high school counselor why we didn't wait a year to send him to school with his May birthday, that he would have had endless opportunities with the extra maturity he would have.

My child who is one of the babies in his class is one of the tallest kids, brightest kids, etc. I can see lots of advantages to waiting to send him if he would have when he was younger.

One of my friends just had her bright, tall, athletic son repeat 6th grade for this same reason. He is one of the brightest kids in his class and very athletic. I taught her son in 6th grade. I think it is such a wise decision. He is completely aware of why he is waiting.

In the end, you just have to do what is best for your family.

This has just been my experience.