Question re: Engagement notices

[Promomx2]

DD just mailed out engagement notices, her wedding isn't until 1/10 so I told her just to send to the immediate family and close friends that we know would be invited to the wedding. Should she had sent them to all of her/and our acquainces that may not be invited to the wedding. We haven't decided on how big or small the wedding will be. Also, she sent to a few of our used to be neighbors whom we were very close, they're still not far. We thought they would call to congratulate her, but we haven't heard anything from them. Should our feelings be hurt? It seems they never hesitate to call her when they want her to babysit.

 

[jnale]

DD just mailed out engagement notices, her wedding isn't until 1/10 so I told her just to send to the immediate family and close friends that we know would be invited to the wedding. Should she had sent them to all of her/and our acquainces that may not be invited to the wedding. We haven't decided on how big or small the wedding will be. Also, she sent to a few of our used to be neighbors whom we were very close, they're still not far. We thought they would call to congratulate her, but we haven't heard anything from them. Should our feelings be hurt? It seems they never hesitate to call her when they want her to babysit.

I sent out engagement notices too and I only sent them to people that I planned on inviting to the wedding because we put initial info in it about the fact that it was a disney wedding.

I wouldn't be hurt by some of those people not calling...some people just don't think to do that.

 

[IndyBride]

I was always under the impression that announcements were simply that. Just announcing the engagement. Am I wrong? I don't think it means you are invited to the wedding. Just like wedding announcement announce the marriage?

 

[PixyDusted]

Hmmm....I think if someone gets an announcement it is sort of a hint they'll be invited to the wedding. I remember when my good friend got engaged 3 years ago and had an engagement "party" at a bar in NYC and she invited people to that that she was not inviting to the wedding. When the one girl I'm thinking of wasn't invited to the wedding (after being at the engagement party) she was angry and confused. I couldn't disagree with her confusion.

3 years later I got engaged and thought I'd learn from that and not send an engagement announcement to anyone who wasn't invited to the wedding. That being said, we're getting married on DCL and we've invited whoever we want because we're not paying for their cruises. (I'd love to but I'm not Milania Trump.)

 

[Ember]

Sending a personal engagement announcement does imply that a wedding invite will follow. The receiver has no social obligation to sent presents, call, or write back, as it is just an announcement, not a solicitation. (Most people probably went, "Oh, so-and-so is engaged, isn't that nice," and put the announcement down.) So I wouldn't be hurt on that front, though you may have s few people expecting an invitation to the wedding now...

A more general announcement in the local paper would also be an option for letting the public know about the engagement.

Wedding announcements are tricky as they are generally sent to people who you feel should know about the wedding but weren't invited. (Traditionally sent on the wedding day.) This has the unfortunate implication that they didn't merit an actual invitation to your wedding but you still want them to know about it...