Pushy family?

[DisneyMama21]

I think I would just say
"we've already treated everyone to a vaction, when are you treating us. The carribean would be nice when are you paying for our room?"

whenever it is brought up I would mention an even more expensive place than the last time.

Denise in MI

I LOVE this idea! I'm guessing it would shut them up quick!

 

[ree123]

I would suggest a nice Hawaiian cruise... On them . Its somebody elses turn to treat you! So ungrateful... You have been very generous and patient while nobody even offered to "pitch in ". Im sure you prob wouldnt even have taken the $$$(at least that is how you come across) but at the least, OFFER!!! We have friends and A (as in one) jerky family member who is upset we havent taken her yet to WDW on our points... Geesh, we bought our first contract 13 mos ago, the second this july! Plan your fam vacay and dont sweat the rest

 

[get_us_to_WDW]

I wish your past generosity would have elicited gratitude rather than greediness!

 

[TheIncredibles!]

I wish your past generosity would have elicited gratitude rather than greediness!

That pretty much sums it up. We shared something with others that meant we enjoyed a little less. We compromised our vacations so we could spread the wealth around as much as possible. Most are thankful, a few are greedy.

 

[WilsonFlyer]

You guys are much nicer than I would be. After I finished with them, I wouldn't have to worry about ever even SEEING them again. Seriously.

 

[dianeschlicht]

Anybody else have pushy family members re: your DVC points?

When DH and I bought 10+ years ago we decided we were going to share as much as possible. It was easy then, we only had 2 kids and fit into a studio. When we had a 3rd we still stayed in a studio until he was 3. (We only go every 3 years as more than that is actually too much for us) We got rooms for all siblings and their families on both sides (at different times) and took the in-laws with us twice.

We decided that since we got everybody down there once, we were done at least for now. No more compromising on our end. We were going to go when we wanted and get the size room we wanted just for us. So this next trip is right before Christmas and we have a 2 BR just for the 5 of us. I have points available but we are waitlisted for VWL and BLT and if it comes through then we will use up more points. (At OKW now) If the waitlist does not come through then DH and I will discuss what to do with the points. These points are in my 2012 use year(August) so they are just fine sitting there while we decide if we want to use for ourselves in the next year or so - or not.

WELL.... "somebody" is mad about that. They want to go again and are upset that we are not offering to share our room. On top of that they are upset that we are "hogging" all the points and we cannot get a room for "somebody else" who wants to go down in January. It was explained that we were not going to be generous with anbybody for awhile as it was time to fully enjoy what we have paid for but that is not going over well.

Just tired of it. What makes anybody think that we are "required" to get them rooms, especially after we have already done so for everybody? Who says round 2 is mandatory? And what makes them think we should compromise our own vacation. The phrase "it's not fair to others if you have something they do not" actually came up. WHAT?? We are all adults here. You want it? Pay for it.

Rant over.

Well....I'd tell them to buy their own points so they can "hog" them for themselves! Unbelievable! Whomever that was would NEVER be using my points again unless they were willing to pay for them!

 

[dianeschlicht]

Unfortunately there is no explaining or educating such people. In my experience seeing many posts along these lines over the years, I'm guessing this is not a surprise from the source, that they have a track record. Usually when you have such family that is so inconsiderate, it's not the first time they've been so. Regardless, I doubt you could ever please them and don't be surprised if they bad mouth you to the rest of the family every chance they get, esp when family is together like the holidays. It is important that the blood relative in such a situation is the one that stands the ground, if they don't, the in-law will always be put in an extremely difficult situation.

We do a family trip about 2 out of every 3 years. I provide the accommodations and invite people until we're full. I decide when, where, etc but I generally do so with both our schedule AND the target groups likely options in mind. I have a few basic rules and anyone that strayed far from them or was a problem simply wouldn't be invited again. I do put a lot of thought and effort into making sure there aren't implied issues. For example, I don't expect or care if anyone thanks me as long as they follow the rules though I must admit that I do appreciate it when they clearly understand the cost, effort and sacrifices involved. I also don't control others vacation other than to ask that we rotate family meals so that many hands make light work and that we go out for a meal as a group once during a week.

Dean, we have done similar with inviting, and it has worked out well. The ones who abuse are never invited back.

 

[Dean]

Dean, we have done similar with inviting, and it has worked out well. The ones who abuse are never invited back.

Fortunately we have good immediate family, this is simply our way of paying back to the family along with ensuring some togethernesss that wouldn't happen otherwise. We've really only had a couple of small issues and they were minor.

 

[shalom]

WELL.... "somebody" is mad about that. They want to go again and are upset that we are not offering to share our room. On top of that they are upset that we are "hogging" all the points...

Wow. I think "somebody" needs to get a grip.

Definitely would tell them you aren't "hogging" all the points -- as has been pointed out, there are plenty of points out there yet to be purchased or rented.

 

[JimMIA]

Give them your sales reps name.. and better yet, show them about re-sale.

Naw, tell 'em to buy BLT direct for $150 pp!

 

[JimMIA]

Well....I'd tell them to buy their own points so they can "hog" them for themselves! Unbelievable! Whomever that was would NEVER be using my points again unless they were willing to pay for them!

Careful Karen...you're gonna get your blood pressure up!

 

[Disneymooner07]

Do you think it would crystallize for this "somebody" if you told him/her that you are actually considering renting out the points you are not using to the tune of $xx00 so that he/she understands that even if you are not using the points, they are not free - that there is an opportunity cost in letting him/her use them? And that if he/she would like the opportunity to use the points, it will cost $xx00?

 

[dianeschlicht]

Do you think it would crystallize for this "somebody" if you told him/her that you are actually considering renting out the points you are not using to the tune of $xx00 so that he/she understands that even if you are not using the points, they are not free - that there is an opportunity cost in letting him/her use them? And that if he/she would like the opportunity to use the points, it will cost $xx00?

I like that idea! It would seem to drive the idea home about the value.

 

[mickeysbestfriend]

when I first bought into the DVC that if family or friends wanted to share the magic of DVC that they would have to pony up the bucks to pay for whatever points we had to use to accomodate their requests such as upgrading from a studio to a one bedroom or a one bedroom to a two bedroom. I have one sister that we gift her stays with us because of her financial situation and it gives us pleasure to share. She pays for her own airfare and food and even tries to treat us to a Dole Whip or citrus swirl when she can.

We will help them rent points if they want and rent them ours at the going rate if we have extra but that is as far as we will go!

 

[Boardwalkin]

That is exactly the reason why our family does not know we own a DVC. Don't want to deal with other family members wanting us to include them in our vacation plans. We have been members for 7 years and have kept it under wraps.

We are exactly the same. We know our family would ruin our Disney experience so nobody knows we are DVC members. Heck my mother lives in Tampa and we don't even tell her when we visit. If I wanted to ruin my vacation I would just stay with my family and get it over with. No offense to families that are happy as clams to hang out, but when I am on vacation I don't want any drama.

 

[OhioDVC]

Welcome to life in the United States in 2011.

Today's society if full of envy. You obviously didn't work hard to earn the money for the points so you should share equally with people who failed to work hard and earn the money to purchase DVC.

Just wait, soon the government will figure out a way to tax DVC members so their points can be used to pay for deserving people on government assistance because they really need a vacation.

 

[leanne2255]

This is sad that families can be like that. I'm thankful that no one in either my family or DH's feels entitled to points. When I have some to spare I do invite family members that would not have an opportunity otherwise. We have also deemed some people as "point worthy", and some that are not. It's our decision and no one else's business. I 'm not sure but I think the money comes out of MY checking account every month which entitles me to all executive decisions.

 

[Boardwalkin]

Welcome to life in the United States in 2011.

Today's society if full of envy. You obviously didn't work hard to earn the money for the points so you should share equally with people who failed to work hard and earn the money to purchase DVC.

Just wait, soon the government will figure out a way to tax DVC members so their points can be used to pay for deserving people on government assistance because they really need a vacation.

Wow, quite the response that has nothing to do with this post! Instead of you staying DVC I hear Rick Perry has a ranch in Texas you might feel more comfortable staying at. Appears you have the same speech coach.

 

[CarpeDisney]

I think a lot of family members"forget" that DVC is a purchase that cost a lot of money for payments and dues and just see the this as a "free" vacation for them since they aren't actually involved in all that it takes for the membership.

Amen to this!! We've taken all members of our extended family along with us on various vacations, and many don't understand the costs of purchase and annual fees.

Now that the perceived "first round" is done, we've started to get the hints/questions from one particularly passive-aggressive relative about her family's next vacation. The latest was a doozey.....my wife got a text (A TEXT!!) from her about 1 month before our last vacation that simply read "So, do you have room for us this time?". As my wife was dumb-founded by the inquiry and didn't want to respond, I quickly did so myself. Simple response: "No". Come on now, if you don't have the decency and respect to ask about something like this in person, don't expect an empathetic response. (...I'll come off my soap box now).

Anyway....to the OP, I wouldn't feel bad whatsoever about using your points for your vacations and not inviting others along. When you're ready to do so again, it will be your decision and nobody else's.

 

[Mousewerks]

Wow, quite the response that has nothing to do with this post! Instead of you staying DVC I hear Rick Perry has a ranch in Texas you might feel more comfortable staying at. Appears you have the same speech coach.

Are you serious? You really don't see how the post you quoted is apropos of the topic at hand?