Potty Training - HELP!

[Jenvenza]

My DD is almost 2.5 and has no desire to to use the potty. We are not forcing her, because I know this can just do more harm than good. We have tried to get her interested, but she flat out refuses. So we have backed off completely and figure she will let us know when she is ready. But my question is - how and when did you get your kids potty trained? Is this normal for a 2.5 year old to have no interest in it at all? She is our first child, so this is all new to me! Any tricks from you potty training pros at there to help me out?

Thanks in advance!

 

[LOVEMYGIRLS4]

I totally understand where you are coming from.. I am a mom to 4 girls 2 of which are twins. I never could understand how people got their children potty trained before they were even 3. ALL of my girls NEVER even wanted to look at the potty before they turned 3.LOL I would always take them with me to the bathroom so they knew what the potty was for but still no luck. I always just left the potty out where they could sit on it if they wanted to with their clothes on, or play with it with their dolls and by the time they turned 3 it was like a light bulb clicked on and they were ready. I just finished potty training the twins who turned 3 in August. I started the week of Thanksgiving for one and she was done in 2 days and then the other one the week before Christmas. I let them wear regular big girl panties for a while so they can feel what it is like when they pee on themselves and then I tell them not to pee in their panties and to pee in the potty and take them straight to the potty to sit on it. It really depends on your child cause all are different and all will take different amounts of time to fully potty train. But just make sure ( if you can) dedicate a full week of NOT going anywhere so that way they can remain in panties and not pull ups or diapers. Good luck!!

 

[npierce25]

My daughter turned 2 at the end of june and was fully potty trained by the end of aug. We did the potty fairy. after she would go and she would get stickers (1 for pee, 2 for 2, and extra stickers if she use public bathrooms (like the mall or told us at resturants)). This worked really well, and of course the potty fairy would leave extra prizes for milestones, like the 1st car trip with out a accident, and things like that to tell her she was doing a good job. after a while the potty fairy came and gave her a new baby doll that she wanted. it really worked for us. She was also waking up dry, that has to really happen 1st. Then as soon as she is up, put her on the potty, if she goes, then sing dance, celebrate how ever, and if she dosent, no big deal. just put her there and read a story, if something happens, great, if not, at least you had a good story time! hope this helps!!!!

let me know if you need any further help!

 

[brergnat]

We JUST got our second son potty trained fully. He turns 4 in two months...he is EXTREMELY stubborn and controlling, and it had to be HIS decision as to when and how.

Our first was potty trained in a day, right after he turned 3. Went from ZERO interest (and actually some fear about using the toilet), to being full on trained because one day he just "decided" he was ready.

All kids are different. Don't compare. 2.5 is, IMO, a bit young to expect a child to be fully trained. Introduce the concept, explain all about being a "big girl", do a lot of modeling (yes, this means letting her watch EVERYONE in the family while they go to the bathroom), and one day, she will decide she is ready. Believe me, you do NOT want a power struggle.

My only advice is to skip the "little potties", and just get a good seat insert (Bjorn makes a great one) and stool, and your DD can manage those on her own WHEN she is ready. Plus, the stool will come in handy at the sink to wash hands.

 

[jms531]

I'm in the same boat...DD will be 3 in May and has no desire to pottytrain. She'll hide when she has to go #2 but it's rare she'll tell us when she's done to be changed. It's as if she doesn't even care. We were waiting b/c she's a little behind in her speech-expressive and receptive so we thought we'd give her a little more time so she can get more words and understanding of them before we expected her to tell us when she had to go or even understand what we were telling her. She's talking a ton more now so I've been putting her on the potty a couple times a day. She'll sit for about 15 seconds, announce that she's done and go on her merry way I'm not sure if it's just not clicking or if she just isn't ready? I just hope she's potty trained before next September-preschool won't take kids if they're not pottytrained...

 

[puffkin]

My only advice is to skip the "little potties", and just get a good seat insert (Bjorn makes a great one) and stool, and your DD can manage those on her own WHEN she is ready. Plus, the stool will come in handy at the sink to wash hands.

The Bjorn seat is awesome...well worth the money

I am a firm believer that there is a very short window when you can train a young child fairly easily....usually right around 2. I never understood why people think you don't have to TEACH a child to go potty....but you do have to lay it out for them just like with everything else. It is a learned behavior. The day my son consistently found his corner, went #2, handed me a diaper and wipes and asked to be changed (he did this 4 days in a row), I knew it was time to TEACH him to use the potty. Was he happy at first, no he wanted a diaper. But it only took 2 days and he was doing #2 in the potty with no issues. #1 followed a few months later. DS was fully trained by 2.5.

If you miss that window, you will probably be in for the long haul and have to wait for when the child decides they are ready. By this point it is a combination of habit, controlling, manipulation etc. There are lots of techniques out there that may work for some children (sticker charts, prizes, etc) but ultimately by this point it is best not to push it too much or you will be in an epic battle

 

[princessmom29]

The Bjorn seat is awesome...well worth the money

I am a firm believer that there is a very short window when you can train a young child fairly easily....usually right around 2. I never understood why people think you don't have to TEACH a child to go potty....but you do have to lay it out for them just like with everything else. It is a learned behavior. The day my son consistently found his corner, went #2, handed me a diaper and wipes and asked to be changed (he did this 4 days in a row), I knew it was time to TEACH him to use the potty. Was he happy at first, no he wanted a diaper. But it only took 2 days and he was doing #2 in the potty with no issues. #1 followed a few months later. DS was fully trained by 2.5.

If you miss that window, you will probably be in for the long haul and have to wait for when the child decides they are ready. By this point it is a combination of habit, controlling, manipulation etc. There are lots of techniques out there that may work for some children (sticker charts, prizes, etc) but ultimately by this point it is best not to push it too much or you will be in an epic battle

I totally argee with the idea that there is a small window, right as they know what they are doing, in which you can easily trian a child and thati s the time to do it. Once they know what they are doing and can asked to be changed afterward, they are capable of diong it in the potty. My Dd was right at 2, and it only took a couple of weeks. She was waking up dry, and wold go and hide when she had to go, and the asked to be changed, wet or #2. Once we started the potty she had few accidents, and by 2.5 I stopped using pullups at night as well. She hadn't really needed them at night, but I really didn't like th idea of changing shhets in the middle of the night. I can count on one hand the number of times I have had to do it, and that was mostly when she was sick.

 

[mjkacmom]

I know many say they will let you know when they are ready, but that's not always the case. I PT'd all of my kids, and not one expressed any interest in the potty. My tried and true method - buy the Once Upon a Potty DVD, nakey butt, potty in room. If more than one accident, diapers back on, revisit in 3 months. I start at 2 1/2.

My neighbor's dd trained on her own before 3, so she decided to wait until her ds was interested before PTing him. He turned 4, and still expressed no interest, so she PT'd him anyway.

My 3 who pt'd before age 3 were much easier than the 2 that I waited until after 3.

 

[glk2009]

My LO turned 2 in December and we are in the midst of potty training. We were on vacation for Christmas and the whole time, she was interested in going to the potty with either me or her dad. So, we knew that she was at least interested. This is our 2nd attempt at potty training... we had tried back in October when she was telling us when she had peed, but it was pretty clear after a few hours that she wasn't interested.

Since we had the long New Year's weekend, we decided to give it a try and she's rolling along. It was definitely helpful to be able to stay home for 3 days and focus on training. It also helped that it snowed pretty much the whole weekend so we had no desire to leave the house!

LO loves flushing the toilet and playing with the toilet paper. She loves her Baby Bjorn mini potty, but will also use the cushy Elmo potty seat at daycare.

We also use stickers and little presents as incentives. And who doesn't love seeing the "pee pee dance"???

Good luck!!!!

 

[kim929]

I have 4 children, my three oldest 2 girls and a boy were all trained by the time they turned 2. I used to let them run around with no pants on, it's easier to sit them down on the potty naked ( you can see they are starting to go) with clothes on you can't see it til it's all over then it's to late. Now my 2nd son, who I had with my present dh was a totally different story. When my mil saw my ds running around in just a t-shirt and no pants she had alot to say to my dh who in turn refused to let him go pantless..( I don't know why, since mil was buying the diapers you would think she would want him trained asap). it took forever to get him trained. He was almost trained then the pull ups went back on and everthing was lost. He finally was trained a little after he turned 4. and only because I went back to what I knew. Should of done that along time before. Good luck, it's not a fun job.

 

[MickeyShow]

My DS trained in October when he was exactly 29 months. I agree about the small window of time because I can guarantee you if I had to try today it would be one big power struggle. I knew he could do it because he would pee on demand for a treat and hold it for bathtime when we always used the potty. So I just took the diapers away and that was it. No accidents and we were done. Of course at first I was taking him every hour or so but within a few weeks he was telling me when he had to go and has been ever since. And he can hold it much longer than I would have expected.

My advice is to wait until you know she's capable and then be very matter-of-fact about it but just go for it full force. The more you go back and forth between diapers and underwear and the more she knows you want her to, the harder it will be. And I don't think there's anything wrong about not being trained at 2.5... that's still very young!

 

[Jenvenza]

OP here!

Thanks for all the great advice and support! I think if it were me doing the actual training, I could probably get it done. But I work full-time and my husband is a SAHD right now, so all of this is on him and I dont think he really has any idea what to do! I talked to him today and told him I really wanted him to start trying more with her. I know she is ready. She holds it at night now and lets us know most of the time when she has gone and wants to be changed. She hides to poop though and does have some constipation problems, so I am a little worried about how that will go.

We are thinking about just taking away the diapers for this entire week and seeing how that goes!

Wish me luck and please keep your stories and tips coming!

 

[Willow25]

My DD will be 2.5 in February and we have been PT for a few months. This is our second try. I agree about the window which we unfortunately missed. I believe my daughter was ready before the age of two she actually went and climbed onto our toilet and went potty. I was pregnant and about two weeks away from giving birth so clearly not ready to PT. So we waited! I decided once the baby was about 4 months to try again. She went potty first thing in the morning and then refused the rest of the day. I tried to force her (naughty!!) but that backfired. We went back to pull ups and waited until she asked to wear panties one day. She does okay and will go dry for about 6 days then will have one day where she will have like 2-4 accidents. Yesterday she did her first poos in the potty twice so big breakthrough for us. They all do it differently and on their own time. My best friend's daughter did it in three days.

I do have a question for you experts when do I stop putting pull ups on for naps and or nighttime. I thought their was a rule about so many days dry??

 

[princessmom29]

My DD will be 2.5 in February and we have been PT for a few months. This is our second try. I agree about the window which we unfortunately missed. I believe my daughter was ready before the age of two she actually went and climbed onto our toilet and went potty. I was pregnant and about two weeks away from giving birth so clearly not ready to PT. So we waited! I decided once the baby was about 4 months to try again. She went potty first thing in the morning and then refused the rest of the day. I tried to force her (naughty!!) but that backfired. We went back to pull ups and waited until she asked to wear panties one day. She does okay and will go dry for about 6 days then will have one day where she will have like 2-4 accidents. Yesterday she did her first poos in the potty twice so big breakthrough for us. They all do it differently and on their own time. My best friend's daughter did it in three days.

I do have a question for you experts when do I stop putting pull ups on for naps and or nighttime. I thought their was a rule about so many days dry??

I think it is better to take away the pullups and diapers all at once all undies all the time I really wish I had done it this was as DD didn't really need pullups at night. It was more about me not being willing to risk having a nightime accident. With few exceptions, friends who have done it this way have had fewer regressions and accidents.

 

[mjkacmom]

I think it is better to take away the pullups and diapers all at once all undies all the time I really wish I had done it this was as DD didn't really need pullups at night. It was more about me not being willing to risk having a nightime accident. With few exceptions, friends who have done it this way have had fewer regressions and accidents.

Actually, many, many kids are physically able to day train before they are physically able to night train. If the child wakes up wet, the child probably isn't ready. My oldest was my only one who did both at the same time. OP, wait until she's dry when she wakes up (I had kids as old as 6 in pullups, and my pediatrician said that was normal).

 

[kwitcherkicken99]

DS was fully trained just after 3. A close friend of ours couldn't get their DD to even consider it until well after she turned 3. She would say, "nope, I go in my diaper!"

Finally one night I asked her if she wanted to try to go potty and again she said nope. I then told her that my DS got candy if he peed and a tattoo if he pooped. She ran over to her mom and told her that she wanted candy and I told her she had to go potty first, then ask her mommy what kind of prize she could get for going. When it sunk in that she had to use the potty, again, she said, no way! I closed out our conversation by asking her if she could practice going potty because I thought it was way cool for big kids to go. About a week later her mom told us that her DD had started wanting to use the potty because I asked her to practice. They sweetened the deal by giving her her favorite reward... stickers.

It just takes time, be patient. With DS we skipped pull ups and went straight to underwear (except for bedtime), he was too tempted to go in the pull up. We started by making him go when he got up in the morning, before lunch and dinner, then before he went to bed. We considered an additional potty trips a bonus. Soon he was going all the time.

Good luck!

 

[DW2010]

Honestly, the best advice I can give is that she'll do it when she's ready. We've been pottytraining DD since she was 27 months. Now she's 3 years and 3 months old!!! I'd say she's 90% trained. She just has phases where she'll go a few days to a week peeing in her panties.

 

[taylor3297]

DS turned 3 back in November and is slowly getting interested in using the potty. In order to even get him to sit on the potty I had to promise M&M's. He will set for 20 seconds and say "I'm done now". I encourage him to sit a bit longer. I picked up from the library today a book titled "Potty Training Boys the Easy Way". The book suggested having PT sessions, which I am currently trying. So for an hour he will wear big boy undies and I will try this for as long as it takes. My ds is not ever woken up dry in the morning, so I know he isn't ready for night training. He will go hide and poop and tell me he is poopy. But he has never told me he is wet. So, I have decided to just take it slow and easy and keep encouraging.