out of control 2 year old.... very long sorry

[ohiominnie]

oi feel guilt that he could have been helped sooner but we just didnt know....i wish you well in this overly frustrating time and i can tell that you are awesome parents
sharon

Don't feel guilt over something you can't do a thing about.
My ds was about 5 weeks old when he had his first ear infection. The VERY FIRST sign there was something wrong was gobs of pus pouring out of his ear! He had no cold symptoms, no fever, no fussiness...he was getting up at night, but he was 5 weeks old...he'd eat and then go back to sleep.

I did feel guilty about it for a bit---that I missed something or should have done something differently....but I had to throw that feeling out the window....I wouldn't have done anything differently!

Btw, my ds also only had 2 ear infections. One from February-June (never went away even with multiple antibiotics) and one from September-Februrary (also never went away) Then he got tubes.

Btw, he never fussed once, even with bulging ear drums! Most of the time the only sign that things weren't getting better would be he'd rub an ear...once or twice a day. That's it!

 

[MommeeOfAPrnzess]

I think she is doing this to get attention. She really doens't understand why your son gets more attention then her - she was the one that got it then a baby is born and he's getting it all -
I would do one on one time and ignore the "little" stuff and correct her for the things that can hurt her or someone else.
See if you or your dh or grandparents can take her to the library for a class or out for special time - she just misses having that time and doesn't get why your son gets so much more - its hard to adjust to a new member of the family let alone one that needs so much attention.
You haven't done anything wrong!! I think once she gets some special time (each day - either going out or for a walk or playing) and attention she will be able to adjust - be honest with her to about what is going one - little ones understand more then what we think.
You and she will be fine -

 

[gabbysmom04]

I want to thank everyone for their kind replies. I have started a chore chart that we get stars for. She gets the starts for helping clean up toys, being nice, sharing, and brushing teeth. i have told her that when she has enough stars she will get a prize.

I have also stocked up on art supplies that we have been doing together. I am going to sign her up for ballet in march. And have asked my MIL to come up a few times a month so I can do more with DD. That was a huge step for me since I am not big on my MIL!

As for her speech, she can talk (alot). She has trouble with a few letters ex: s and f she for some reason cannot close off the passage to her nose so these and a few other letters come out her nose. it is the same speech condition we expect our DS to have because of his cleft.

A sad story I wanted to share, On Sat my DH and I were getting the kids ready to go out. My DH said oh Dominic you are so cute, look at baby Dominic. My DD Gabby looks at me and says "what about Gabby I cute too" that just broke my heart!

 

[disneymom3]

Oh, that is a sad little story. It really sounds like a lot of this is just about not getting enough alone time or attention. As someone else said she really is just a baby too. The only thing I would totally crack down on is the hitting. That is an immediate time out around here. We do not ever hit. EVerything else, I choose my batttles. Good luck and hugs to you and your little one!!

 

[belle&beast]

As for her speech, she can talk (alot). She has trouble with a few letters ex: s and f she for some reason cannot close off the passage to her nose so these and a few other letters come out her nose. it is the same speech condition we expect our DS to have because of his cleft.

A sad story I wanted to share, On Sat my DH and I were getting the kids ready to go out. My DH said oh Dominic you are so cute, look at baby Dominic. My DD Gabby looks at me and says "what about Gabby I cute too" that just broke my heart!

Has your therapist/doctor looked into submucosal cleft. It is a type of cleft that is covered by skin- my first instinct when dealing with a nasal emission.

I had to remind relatives to give the same attention to DD as DS when they were younger, too. It is heartbreaking, but now DD gets attention for being bigger and everyone comes to see her play t-ball and dance in her recitals. It is so difficult, but it will get better.

 

[Along4theRide]

I agree with what some others are saying about your DD needing some heart to heart time with one or even both parents (if possible)! I know this time is hard for you and my heart goes out to you and your family.

Oh, and as far as her speech. My DD had some problems with a few letters up until she was 3.5!! S and R were some of them. Our Parents as Teacher's instructer we had kept wanting me to have her seen by a speech pathologist, but I didn't think it was neccessary. She started preschool when she was 3.5 and soon "grew" out of it. Now, my DS(that is current 3.5) is doing the same thing with his speech, but with different letters. He'll start preschool in the fall, but we still work with him on it. Your DD's speech will probably correct its self over time!!

 

[gabbysmom04]

Has your therapist/doctor looked into submucosal cleft. It is a type of cleft that is covered by skin- my first instinct when dealing with a nasal emission.

I had to remind relatives to give the same attention to DD as DS when they were younger, too. It is heartbreaking, but now DD gets attention for being bigger and everyone comes to see her play t-ball and dance in her recitals. It is so difficult, but it will get better.

That is the first thing that they looked for. Our son has been working with a speech therapist who first confirmed that we might want to have her checked out. We saw an ENT, the speech therapist at NYU where our son goes, and a woman from EI. Everyone has said the same thing she has velopharyngeal incompetency. The same thing that everyone has told us to expect our son to have. I hate to say it but the way she says "yes" is so cute.