our secret green club? Part 8

[SleepingBeautyDreamr]

Superman and Batman

Superman once wrote on the wall: "Batman is a wimp."
The next day Batman wrote: "Superman is Clark Kent."

 

[SleepingBeautyDreamr]

Homer's Favorite Ice Cream

What is Homer Simpson's favorite ice cream?

Chocolate-chip cookie DOH!

 

[crossfamily]

Quote:
Originally Posted by crossfamily
Yeah I moved my boys in together at the beginning of the winter and I'm surprised anthony didn't complain but he actually likes having nick with him..


Wow...you guys sound like you have such great kids...you should have more.

What were you doing early today?

What she said!!!!!

Were you joining your sister for a lunch?

 

[SleepingBeautyDreamr]

Movie Prices

For the first time in many years, a an old man traveled from his rural town to the city to attend a movie. After buying his ticket, he stopped at the concession stand to purchase some popcorn. Handing the attendant $1.50, he couldn't help but comment, "The last time I came to the movies, popcorn was only 15 cents."

"Well, sir," the attendant replied with a grin, "You're really going to enjoy yourself. We have sound now."

 

[SleepingBeautyDreamr]

Yogi
Why didn't they make two Yogi Bears?


Cause someone made a Boo-Boo!

 

[SleepingBeautyDreamr]

A Good Mystery

A mystery-lover takes his place in the theater for opening night, but his seat is way back in the theater, far from the stage. The man calls an usher over and whispers, ''I just love a good mystery, and I have been anxiously anticipating the opening of this play. However, in order to carefully follow the clues and fully enjoy the play, I have to watch a mystery close up. Look how far away I am! If you can get me a better seat, I'll give you a handsome tip.''
The usher nods and says he will be back shortly. Looking forward to a large tip, the usher speaks with his co-workers in the box office, hoping to find some closer tickets. With just three minutes left until curtain, he finds an unused ticket at the Will Call window and snatches it up. Returning to the man in the back of the theater, he whispers, ''Follow me.'' The usher leads the man down to the second row, and proudly points out the empty seat right in the middle. ''Thanks so much,'' says the theatergoer, ''This seat is perfect.'' He then hands the usher a quarter.

The usher looks down at the quarter, leans over and whispers, ''The butler did it in the parlor with the candlestick.''

 

[SleepingBeautyDreamr]

I have officially knocked Disunc out of 9th place and before 5pm CST on the day I said I would So I will now stop with the jokes till I get bored again or I decide to go after Kelly

 

[nsalz]

What were you doing early today?


Were you joining your sister for a lunch?

It is Friday...a little earlywon't hurt

 

[SleepingBeautyDreamr]

It is Friday...a little earlywon't hurt

I tell you right now I wish I could have some early sitting in front of me. Too bad it might make my meds do crazy things or me that is

Don't think I need to be running down Main Street neckid screaming Born Free

 

[SleepingBeautyDreamr]

This one isn't to boost post count or because I was bored. I just had to post it because I thought it was to funny not too.


Dear Alcohol,

First & foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. As my
friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work
cocktail, a beer at the game, and you're even around at the holidays, hidden
inside chocolates, as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless
family gatherings. However, lately I've been wondering about your
intentions. While I want to believe that you have my best interests at
heart, I feel that your influence has led to some unwise
consequences:


1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I
question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity
takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those
ex-boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear
from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night?

2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that I
eat a taco with chili sauce, along with a big Italian meatball and some
stale chips (washed down with WINE & topped off with a Kit Kat after a few
cheese curls & chili cheese fries)? I'm an eclectic eater, but I think you
went too far this time.

3. Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need do more
yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by
causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black & blue
marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond me.

Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front
door key into the lock.

4. Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous.
I know a little penance for our previous evening's debauchery may be in
order, but the 3pm hangover immobility is completely unacceptable. My entire
day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken (water, vitamin
B, bread products,
aspirin) prior to going to sleep/passing out face down on the kitchen floor
with a bag of popcorn, the hangover should be minimal & in no way interfere
with my daily activities.

Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now & would like to
ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great
stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion when I
just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets. In order to
continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances
above & address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than
Thursday 3pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions & hopefully we can
continue this fruitful partnership.

Thank you,
One of your biggest fans

P.S. THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative 2. Preliminary 3. Proliferation 4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Specificity 2. British Constitution 3. Passive-aggressive disorder

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Thanks, but I don't want to have sex.
2. Nope, no more beer for me.
3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
4. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight?
5. Oh, I couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing.

 

[pfishgirl]

Speaking of being green I think it is time to add some to your avatar picture. What part should be green? I can take care of it for you tonight if you would like.

I also need to get a hold of Red Fraggles (aka Kelly) and fix it up a bit

oh oh oh oh oh I would LOVE some Green

 

[pfishgirl]

It is Friday...a little earlywon't hurt

Yikes, I have some to do as well but I'm too busy with Dis to do it


IceSkating and Japanese Food tomorrow !!

 

[pfishgirl]

GREASE!!! The Movie is on TV !!!

 

[pfishgirl]

I know, I know. One of few houses around this area without central. And this area is SE Coastal VA, the humid zone from July - Sept!! icky - sticky! Course I didn't have it in the van last summer either and no heat earlier this winter, since the radiator is bad. Now I drive my dad's 85 with hea, but no tunes.

Yikes.. Poor Thing You need a Vacation!!
WDW is calling you

 

[MrOakie]

Hey Everyone. How are all y'all doing?

 

[MrOakie]

We just ordered Pizza for dinner. Louisiana style Cajun crawfish pizza and mozzarella sticks

 

[TOT_Boy_]

hi everyone . its friday

 

[MrOakie]

hi everyone . its friday

Hiya Tot Boy.

 

[crossfamily]

MrO and TotBoy... How are ya'll doing tonight?

 

[MrOakie]

MrO and TotBoy... How are ya'll doing tonight?

Doing pretty good. Loving this pizza we ordered. YUMMY crawfish mmmmm