OT- two new little angels

[disneybridetobe]

I am so sorry for your loss, my heart goes out to you.

 

[Jenvenza]

I am sure words wont do much to help heal your pain right now, but I am so sorry for your loss. I wish I knew of something better to say or to tell you when you will feel better. I am just so sorry you and your family are having to go through this. You are in my thoughts.

 

[LoveMyDisneyCats]

Thank you all for your kind words...
As I woke up this morning with no one to talk to (DH is back at work and my mom/sister all went back too today), it was so comforting to be able to come here and read and cry a little. As many of you have said happened with you, I DO want to talk about it- they were real...Jack & Alex were real... and I can't just move on right away- but today I find that without DH home or mom here, it's just me alone. So thank you for being there. In some crazy way, even though I don't know a single one of you , this is so good for me.

I am so sorry for all of you who have been here before and am sorry for probably being one of those unknowing, well-meaning people that has always said the wrong thing or nothing at all. I now know and feel horrible that I, as a mother, never put much into it. I have been so blessed with my two girls before this that I never really took the time to think about how it must feel to lose one- at any stage other than after they were born alive at term.

*To MommaSnowWhite who just found out yesterday the same sad news- I am here with you. A little piece of me inside aches as I read of so many who have shared this loss and to know that your pain is so new too, I am just so sorry. Be strong and know that I can share your new tears if you need.

Thank you again DISfriends- you are helping me in a way that is much needed right now.

 

[kellyg403]

I am so sorry for all of you who have been here before and am sorry for probably being one of those unknowing, well-meaning people that has always said the wrong thing or nothing at all. I now know and feel horrible that I, as a mother, never put much into it. I have been so blessed with my two girls before this that I never really took the time to think about how it must feel to lose one- at any stage other than after they were born alive at term.

Thank you again DISfriends- you are helping me in a way that is much needed right now.

I was hoping to see you on today. It sounds like whether you know it or feel like it, your healing is beginning. People will say "you have other children" or "time heals" but really in the end, this moment will be with you forever. How you live, raise your children everything you do will now include this moment. It takes time and it hurts every step of the way, but somehow I wouldn't change it. Knowing my dd for that moment has to be good enough and that small moment I cherish. Many hugs to you and your family. Be gentle to yourself and don't be afraid to let it out.

Kelly

 

[sashagiselle]

My heart goes out to you. I don't know the right thing to say only what I feel - may you find comfort in that your beautiful boys are together and will always be with you and a part of your family

 

[Anonomom]

I am so, so sorry for your loss.

 

[LoveMyDisneyCats]

Knowing my dd for that moment has to be good enough and that small moment I cherish.
Kelly

Aaaaahhhhh.....tears again. But you are so right. For three days before we lost them but as I lay in the hospital under watch, the nurses would ask me, "when and if the time comes, will you want to see them....hold them..." And for three days, I thought "no way, no how could I do that." But in the end, I did- I held them both and called them their names and told them they were loved and now I am so glad because I have that one moment with them that me and DH can remember and cherish.

It is so good to here that even after time, you have that and cherish it. I am even more glad for that decision now.

 

[NY_MOM]

My deepest condolences to you and your family,who will be in my prayers. The loss of a child is somehting that should never be, and there are no words that can explain or give meaning to what you're feeling now,just know that our thoughts and prayers are with you.

 

[huey duey & luey]

I am truly sorry for your losses

 

[mama2twins]

I'm very sorry for your loss.

 

[ADAMANDLISA]

You remember the saying "It's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all"? I find it to be so true. I would go through all of the pain and heartache over and over again just to hold my little girl for that week one more time.

It takes time for your heartache to subside. The one thing that helped me the most was talking about her. It was frustrating to me that people were afraid to talk to me, so I would have to be the one to bring it up.

There are many ways to honor your boys memory, too, when you are ready. We walked in the March of Dimes "March for Babies" in honor of my daughter.

If you ever need to talk, feel free to PM me anytime!

 

[frtchr]

I'm so, so sorry for your loss. I had a m/c with my first, and it was the worst thing I have ever felt. No one wanted to talk about it, but it helped me when I could. Use the board as a place to talk about Jack and Alex, a place to vent, and a place to cry.

 

[SandrainNC]

I am so sorry.

Sandra

 

[chloe770]

My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family. I'm so sorry for you loss.

 

[*Wish*Upon*A*Star*]

I am so sorry to hear of your sons' passing. Our first son was stillborn at 26 weeks gestation, he weighed 15.5 ounces and was 11 inches long. We celebrated his fourth birthday and angel day just yesterday. I still remember the pain, sadness, and heartbreak when we got to hold his beautiful little body, stroke his soft blond hair, and just cuddle with him for the first and last time.

My advice to you is this... take time for yourself, your husband, and your family. Take as much time as you need. Grieve for your precious sons. Did you/will you have a funeral for them? Will you have someplace to go (a cemetery or a special spot) to spend time with them? Our son is buried in a cemetery and I know we went there every single day, sometimes twice a day, when he passed. For the first six weeks - until I had to go back to work - we spent as much time there as we possibly could. It helped us to feel connected to him and just grieve his passing. I remember not wanting to see anyone - and I mean ANYONE - for days at a time. And that's OKAY. Do what feels best for you.

In the beginning, I thought we could deal with his passing on our own. I didn't want to feel like a "needy person" by seeing a therapist or joining a support group. But about three months after he died, I contacted a local support group for bereaved parents and we met some of the nicest people we know at that support group. There were parents whose daughter was stillborn at 41 weeks. There were parents of stillborn twins - they lost them at 18 weeks. There was a woman who lost her baby at 13 weeks. There was a couple who already had a child and their baby was stillborn at 38 weeks. A couple who lost their triplets at 23 weeks. Just people who we could really relate to and who could relate to us. We looked forward to our weekly meetings simply because we could talk to people who understood what we were going through. They knew what it felt like to lose a child and be so grief-stricken you felt like you couldn't go another day. I know support groups aren't for some people, but if you feel like it might be a good fit for you, I'd urge you to look into it.

And finally, please know I'll keep you and your precious angels in my thoughts and prayers. If you ever want someone to "talk to" about your boys, I'm here. I'll say a special prayer to my little angel, Michael, to take your boys under his wing and show them around Heaven's playground.

 

[peanut1967]

sending my love...and this may not help at this moment but 20 years ago I lost my first baby at around 5 1/2 months. It was heart renching and I still remember every detail, but then 1 year and 1 month later my Son was born, if my first baby hadnt left us we would not have Kris, and I know my other baby boy is here and he is in my heart.
my prays are with you

 

[fortheluvofpooh]

Thank you all for your kind words...
As I woke up this morning with no one to talk to (DH is back at work and my mom/sister all went back too today), it was so comforting to be able to come here and read and cry a little. As many of you have said happened with you, I DO want to talk about it- they were real...Jack & Alex were real... and I can't just move on right away- but today I find that without DH home or mom here, it's just me alone. So thank you for being there. In some crazy way, even though I don't know a single one of you , this is so good for me.

I am so sorry for all of you who have been here before and am sorry for probably being one of those unknowing, well-meaning people that has always said the wrong thing or nothing at all. I now know and feel horrible that I, as a mother, never put much into it. I have been so blessed with my two girls before this that I never really took the time to think about how it must feel to lose one- at any stage other than after they were born alive at term.

*To MommaSnowWhite who just found out yesterday the same sad news- I am here with you. A little piece of me inside aches as I read of so many who have shared this loss and to know that your pain is so new too, I am just so sorry. Be strong and know that I can share your new tears if you need.

Thank you again DISfriends- you are helping me in a way that is much needed right now.

Jack and Alex, what good strong names. They will guide you through life. I know you miss them terribly. 4 yrs later and I still think of William every single day. Only now I can smile when I think of him. Trust in yourself. Lean on God he is here for you. Lean on us we will always listen. Again, I am so so sorry, this is one club I never wanted to join.

 

[Natalie_89]

i am so sorry for your loss...i cant imagine how much you must be hurting.you and ur fami ly r in my thoughts im so sorry

 

[hugabearjo]

I am so sorry, I have been through the loss of a child and although you never forget, time does make the pain dull. Hugs to you..... small word of warning so you will be prepared and have answers. I know for me anyway there were people in my life that wanted to pretend it didn't happen, like my baby didn't exsist. She did exsist. and it was hard to let go of the plans, dreams, and hopes I had for her. I love her today like the day I found out about her and the day I lost her.

Please know you are not alone. There are many of us here.

I will keep you and your angels in my prayers.

Hugs-
Jo

 

[TarzansKat]

I am so sorry for your loss.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.