OT- siblings sharing a room

[renae3]

Hello everyone. I love these boards, I get so much wonderful information! Anyway, I was hoping for some advice with my "room" situation. I have 3 kids a girl 6 months old and 2 boys ages 6 and 3. We only have a 3 bedroom house so that means 2 kids will have to share a room. Up until now we have had the baby in our room but its getting time to move her. Anyway, my dilemna is how to put the boys together. My 6 year old goes right to bed at 8pm while my 3 year old stays up and talks until 9 pm or so. Then my 3 year old gets up earlier too in the morning. He also usually wakes up at least once each night saying he cant sleep! I am afraid if I put them together my 3 year old will keep the 6 year old up and he needs to sleep since he has kindergarten every day. Then the other issue besides different sleep schedules is the lack of space in the room. It is about 10x11, how do I handle all their clothes, toys, etc. I would love to hear from those who have siblings who share a room and what works for you. I feel like my older son will have no sleep, less room, and no privacy. But we really don't have any other choice at this point since moving is not financially possible. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated, thanks in advance!

 

[The Moonk's Mom]

We have three kids also and the same bedroom breakdown. They used to have the problem of the bedtime issue before school started for my middle DS. So this is what we did...first, we waited until school was out to make the changes. Then we bought bunkbeds for the boys and my daughter got her own room. (she used to love to be in the same room with my DS7, but she was old enough she NEEDED her own room when we did the switch). Then, we just slowly but surely got them all on the same bed time. It will take time, and that is why I did it during the summer...sleep patterns were easier to adjust without haveing to deal with school.

Good Luck!

 

[2disneyboys]

We have 2 sons & a 3 bedroom house. However, it is *VERY* imporant to me to have a seperate room that can be used as a craft room for my scrapbooks and sewing.. it's just to hard to work on that kind of stuff and always have to put it away.. I needed the extra room so I can just Shut the door while working on a project.

I put DS's in the larger of the 2 extra bedrooms w/ bunkbeds. and we just started working and adjusting thier bedtimes till they were both going out around the same time. I would tell younger DS that he can play after older DS is asleep but that he (younger) has to lay in bed quiet and still until older is asleep. Then after bedtime stories/prayers I would dimm the lights and use their CD player to play music or an audio book. As a result within a week of doing this, both were going to bed well and not keep each other up. Also, this may help your younger son's sleep habits in general... for a while my youger son was a night owl.

 

[mjmoon]

I think the best solution would be to try and get the boys on the same schedule.. I'm not sure the best way to go about doing that.. does your 3 year old nap? If so, maybe shortening his daytime nap will help him go to at the time your 6 YO does. Also, when he wakes up in the middle of the night, does he cry from his room or come into yours? How well does your older DS sleep? Wakes up may not bother him at all if he is a deep sleeper.

Good luck to you.

 

[kacaju]

my 13dd and 9dd year old share a room. If by chance they go to bed at the smae time and they start talking I make the younger one sleep in my bed until they both fall asleep, then I move her into her bed. (younger one because she is easier to move while sleeping!!)
Our room is small and they have a bed dresser and a desk. All toys go into the basement since there is no room.
They will adjust as long as you don't make a big deal over it.

 

[dyna]

Mnay years ago my older DD's wanted to share a room wanted bunk beds I liked the idea of the bunk beds knowing they could be taken down an used in seperate rooms too.

They shared for awhile they was like 3 an 4 they got to be 5 an 6 an 1 decided she didn't want to share anymore so if she was on top she rocked (an it took a lot to shake those bunk beds very very sturdy going strong to this day ) if she was on the bottom she used her feet an legs to lift the top bunk up. Neither of which the other one could tolerate an sleep Lucky for me I had a 4 bedroom house an their was no need for them to share a room.

About those bunk beds if I was going to be shopping for bunk beds I'd search for a used set of BRAWNY LAD bunkbeds they was sold by Sears in the early to mid 80's they was pricey but mine are still going strong had to replace matress boards once an matresses once they are STURDY to this day an still look good too.

 

[mjkacmom]

My twins have been together since birth, so even if one wakes, it doesn't phase the other. They're in bunk beds. However, eventually ds6 and dd 8 will switch, which makes me a little nervous, because dd6 and dd8 aren't used to each other. I think you boys will adjust.

 

[brymolmom]

My two were in the same room since birth until 2 months ago...works fine but they were used to it (older one had to get used to the younger one at first though). I say - figure out what works best for the family - sounds like the 3 and 6 year olds might be the winner there - then just set a plan and stick to it. There will be adjustment time. The 6 year old WILL BE awakened by the 3 year old at times (same thing other way around say if the 6 year old is sick or something). It will get better with time and age. You could try something fun and 'new' with the new setup of a reward system for the 3 year old. If he stays in bed all night quietly he gets a sticker or something and after a certain number - a reward. IT might work. Also - for the waking earlier thing - just teach the earlier riser to get right out of the room (we always let our early riser dd just veg with TV in the family room when she woke so that ds could sleep in). I agree to start it in the summer - they will be exhausted due to outside playtime and the 6 year old won't have school to worry about.

Good luck!

 

[snoopy5386]

just an idea....would it work better to put the 6 year old and the baby together, or the 3 year old and the baby? It doesn't have to be forever but for a few years it might work better.

 

[renae3]

Thanks so much for all the advice. I actually did think about putting the baby and 6 year old together, since they both have similar sleeping patterns! It just seemed to make more sense with the 2 boys, though I did forget to mention they fight constantly and putting them in a room may make it much worse for everyone! I am just not sure what the best decision would be....if only I had one more bedroom!

 

[PollyannaMom]

Thanks so much for all the advice. I actually did think about putting the baby and 6 year old together, since they both have similar sleeping patterns! It just seemed to make more sense with the 2 boys, though I did forget to mention they fight constantly and putting them in a room may make it much worse for everyone! I am just not sure what the best decision would be....if only I had one more bedroom!

Is YOUR room very large? What if you trade with the boys and put up a room divider, so they have 2 mini-rooms, and only "share" a door? Then you take the larger of the other rooms and gave the baby the smallest. (You may need to steal some of her closet space for yourself.)

 

[nessz79]

I have a 6 year old and 4 year old who share a room. They have been sharing a room for over a year now. We got them on the same bedtimes first. Once they are on the same bedtimes, it is so much easier. My 4 year old still takes a nap during the day (the last few months of that before he goes to Kindergarten). On the weekends it's at home, during the week it's at preschool.

They both go to bed at around 7:30 on weeknights and get up around 6-6:15 for school. The 4 year old takes an additional 1 hour nap most days. I wonder why your 3 year old doesn't sleep much at night? Does he take a long daytime nap?

Ours have a very small room...about 10 X 10. They have bunk beds that we bought from Wal-Mart. I like them because they are stable but not too bulky. We had to build them from a kit, but it wasn't too bad for my DH. We also have 2 dressers in the room, a hamper, a small closet and that's it. They have their toys and crafts in 2 other rooms- the family room and a craft/computer room (our 3rd bedroom). Maybe your kids can have their toys in a family room? We use Rubbermaid boxes and shelves to keep them organized.

Best of luck to you. Sounds like you need to get your 3 year old's schedule down first and go from there .

 

[nessz79]

Thanks so much for all the advice. I actually did think about putting the baby and 6 year old together, since they both have similar sleeping patterns! It just seemed to make more sense with the 2 boys, though I did forget to mention they fight constantly and putting them in a room may make it much worse for everyone! I am just not sure what the best decision would be....if only I had one more bedroom!

Regarding the constant fighting- I can empathize. Our kids go through phases of constant fighting and then phases of "peace." However, it doesn't really affect the night time...but we have a very structured bed time routine and when it's lights out, there is no more talking (that's the rule). Good luck

 

[PHXscuba]

This is just like my sister .. her boys have shared a small room since her daughter was born. The benefit is that many little boy toys overlap so you don't have to have 2x the toys with two boys. Her younger DS slept in a toddler bed until recently to save space. They kept most of the toys in the closet and used bins for their clothes instead of a dresser.
Sleep is going to be an issue. I agree with a PP that waiting until summer may make it an easier transition if you can wait that long. Or, if DS6 doesn't object, let him go to bed early, then sneak DS3 in at his bedtime after DS6 is asleep (that's what I do with my DDs who share a room so they don't talk to each other).
With them in the same room, you will have to make some good rules about what is shared and what is their own. There will be fighting! In the short run it will be tough but it will work if you work at it.
Help them find the "cozy corners" of the house to get some space from their brother. My DDs each had a shelf in our pantry to keep arts/crafts materials and school stuff to keep it out of their bedroom.

PHXscuba