OT: Private Schools...Yes or No...Help!!!

[mommiepoppins]

I have my children in a private Christain school. We do the school becasue of our beliefs. I have done public schools and I was not happy. To me public school is not an option for us in my area. I would home school first before I set my girls to public school. I have seen children grow up to fast ( sexually) in the public school in my area.

 

[bigbabyblues]

My DS is in private school that we have to work hard to afford. We live in a very poor, somewhat rural area, and the schools here are among the worst in the state. He is in a kindergarten class with 11 kids; they have a teacher and a full time (certified) aide. All of the kids get plenty of attention and help when they need it.

 

[aes74]

That's not what I meant. I was saying that I'm an advocate of public schools - they're what made our country what it is today. That being said, I wouldn't subject my child to a public school simply because I believe in the system - I would do what was best individually for my child. Perhaps "guinea pig" wasn't the appropriate term -

The best example I can think of was when Jimmy Carter sent his daughter Amy to public school to prove he supports public schools. I thought it was a dumb move then (when I was a child) and and I think that now, as a parent. Just because I believe public schools should be supported, it doesn't mean I'd risk my child's education by sending them to one just to prove a point.

I hope that explains what I meant a bit more thoroughly.

Oh, okay, I get what you're saying. Good point. And to even continue it further, I would say don't send your kid to any school because you feel pressured, public or private. I know a couple people who are going broke sending their kids to a super-expensive private school because they think it's the "in" thing to do. They feel socially pressured to do it.

We personally want to have three or four kids (we have two now), and I doubt we could afford the $40,000 a year and still go on vacations (like Disney) and have extracurricular activities. Last year we saved enough money to take the kids to Europe for 3 weeks...and I think that's definitely an education!! We couldn't have done both. So, you have to make choices. Some people would totally disagree with that and have less children...but as I said before we've found a terrific magnet school where each kid has their own laptop, etc, and she is thriving academically and socially. And we are a happy family that would love to expand...slowly .

 

[Steph9072]

I am a product of the public school system. Even being diagnosed with dyslexia and ADD as a Freshman I still got a very good education and with the exception of a few teacher would not have changed a thing. My dh went to a private Lutheran school from k-8 then to public high school. As most of the kids in his family has.

I started thinking about school for my kids and praying about it when my dd was like 2 or 3. I wanted her to go to public school because I wanted her to experience things like people from different cultures and races and different backgrounds that she may not have been able to do in private school. Plus I didn't want her to go to the private school just the be the next generation with the teachers already having an opinion about her. I wanted her to be able to herself.

This was her first and only year in public school. I have spent nights crying myself to sleep because of my decision my daughter has endured an awful education year. Where she now doesn't like school. Before when in preschool I couldn't get her there fast enough. Now I have to practically drag her on the bus. I have a whole laundry list of issues but I will name just a few. There is a little Mexican girl in her class this child claims to not understand English. The teacher told me that this little girl doesn't understand the teachers but can talk full conversations with the kids. This little girl pulled dd's pants down on the playground, pushed dd head first into a wall and picked on dd on a daily basis. This little girl was not punished because she "didn't understand English." I told time English or Spanish has nothing to do with conduct. To the point that I finally told the school that this fell under the bulling act and I would get an attorney if I had to to make them do their jobs and provide dd a safe place to learn. Then here recently dd said the word Jesus on the school bus and almost got kicked off the bus. Just little things. And academically I don't feel she is getting the education she deserves.

So next year dd will be going to a private Lutheran School.

 

[Oceana]

my kid is in private school. I dont trust his education to anyone else

Money for us is a major issue we just sacrifice everything else

julie

 

[Figment*Fan]

If you choose a private school, really do your homework. When my son reached school age, we elected to send him to a local private Christian school -- it was the worst decision we ever made. There were things happening there (that we found out all too late, unfortunately!) that I would have never imagined. After we pulled DS out asap after learning of the things taking place, he was in a public school until I could gather together the curriculum and fill out the paperwork to homeschool him. The public school was a *much* better environment than the Christian school was, though homeschooling is what we continue with because it is the best fit for my family.

Another option in some states are the cyber-charter schools -- they are public schools that kids are allowed to attend from home.

 

[Deb & Bill]

I went to public school for 12 years - it was the only thing available, but it was good.

My husband went to private school (Catholic) and public school depending on where they were living at the time.

Our son has completed 9 years of Catholic school and will be starting Catholic HS in the fall. He has been taking Spanish for the past 8 years (enough to understand a bit, but he really didn't enjoy it that much so he'll be taking Latin in HS - two year language requirement). He's taking Algebra in 8th grade and just took the proficiency test this week to see if he can get HS credit. Did the same for his computer skills.

You might want to check out test scores for the public and private schools. Be aware that the private school cannot take the exact same test the public schools are taking because of licensing. They may be taking a test from the same company that is a few years older or they may have a different testing company than that of the public schools. So you really can't compare them apples to apples. But it should be close.

Also check out accreditation for the private school. Our Catholic schools are both acredited by SACS. It was a fairly rigorous process for the schools and took about a year to accomplish.

Talk to other parents in the community who have children enrolled in both the private and public schools and get their feel for it. Ask the schools if you might visit for a few hours to see what the program is all about. I know our school has a registration process each spring that includes these visits.

 

[emma'smom]

We are choosing private school for our dd's because I really feel that they will receive more individualized attention and that their needs can be better met in private schools. Both of my children are very bright.

I just think, however talented and well-meaning a teacher they would have in public school, the teachers have their hands tied with meeting standards, preparing for high-stakes tests, and those ever looming No Child Left Behind classifications on their backs.

My daughter is the type that a teacher would know would pass the exams and that I would work with her at home on enrichment and, while she might be moved ahead for a reading or math group, would not have the opportunity to study ideas in more depth because the teacher will be limited in his/her time to prepare individual work for just one child.

Public school, historically, was created as a means to educate the masses...and this is its purpose! I am certified teacher and believe in the power of good public education to create an effective society. I strongly support public schools, vote for every levy, buy every fund raiser, and rally around the teachers.

However, I don't want to risk my child's best interests being overlooked to make sure that others aren't "left behind".

I do, however, plan to send them to public schools for middle and high school because our best private school only goes to 6th grade and they will need to learn to navigate public school waters at some point. We have a start-up IB program at our high school which I am hoping will be well-established by the time my dd's are teenagers.

 

[michygoomy]

My husband thought long and hard about this decision, and we still revisit it every few years.

Husband and I went to Catholic schools for elementary, high school, and for me undergrad and post-grad. We were *certain* our kids would go to private school!

When the time came with my first one, we sent him to the neighborhood public school for kindergarten, to get "one free year" out of the system (we had both gone to public kindergarten) and just in case he needed to repeat kindergarten (he was a young kindergartener with an August birthday), we could switch schools.

Well, we fell in love with our little public school! Before first grade, my husband interviewed the principals of the public and private schools we were interested in, and asked a lot of questions about education style and programs. The public school won hands down for its educational philosophy and it's extra programs (at the private school it was languages and arts, at the public was geography--I think an understanding of Geography is critical in today's world.)

When it came time for middle school with the oldest, we thought we switch to private instead of sending him to the public neighborhood middle school. Then I found a K-8 school that would accept students from other neighborhoods if they met certain criteria. He got in, and it was the best thing for him. He REALLY blossomed at this school, it's fantastic! I used to hate the idea of switching at middle-school age, but for him, I think it was great for him to get out with new people and a new environment.

Now he's been accepted to the local magnet high school. Its programs are so great, it's amazing! The ASL is in Hawaii right now in the national competition--and they've won most years in the past!

My daughter is still at the neighborhood K-6 school, and this year was accepted to their gifted program and she is LOVING it! She gets to study all kinds of interesting subjects in depth.

I like the public school system because of the variety of programs for different learners. The boy did a Gaps program when he needed extra help in the early grades, and now is in the honors at the new school. My daughter has two IEPs--one for speech and one for gifted.

I also appreciate the diversity. My Catholic school was very homogeneous. My kids' attend school with a variety of people from different backgrounds and even different counties. I feel they have a broader understanding of their community, and little a less apprehension about people different from them.

Be careful just looking at test scores--because my daughter's school has a lot of ESL students, sometimes that is reflected in the scores. It doesn't affect the quality of the education she receives. Sure, any school that can pick and choose who attends are going to have fantastic scores. I also suggest one-on-one interviews with the principals, like my husband did, and talk to EVERYONE you know with school-age children. That's how I found out that lots of kids coming from the private schools to the public found themselves behind the rest of the class.

Good luck with your decision.

 

[lastminutemom]

Please remember that regardless which decision you make, you are the primary influence on your child's behavior and morals and ethics, even if you choose a religious school. Last year, a teenager who was a student at a Episcopal school tried to kill herself by driving her parents' mercedes into another car. Of course, she survived, but killed a mother of two in the other car. She has just been charged with vehicular homicide. I am certain that the school could do nothing to prevent this -- but less confident in the parents' culpability. This was a troubled young person. The trial begins later this year.

My nieces attend one of Atlanta's best private schools -- when you ask them the difference between their school and the neighborhood public school, they say that it is the lack of fights at their school. AT both schools, kids are having sex early, using alcohol too freely and my nieces think there is more drug use among students at their school because of the $ that the families have. My sister and brother in law closely regulate their behavior and friends, and these girls have good heads on their shoulders.

Just be sure that you make the decision for the right reason -- neither choice alone will determine what type of peoiple your children turn into.

 

[cheapi86]

I went to a private high school (am now in college) and I loved it. My teachers were really dedicated, we had a lot of indivialized attention, a lot of extra educational opportunities, and the reputation of the school DEFINITELY impressed college admission counselors.

That said there were some cons. I became acutely aware of "class" issues. For example I never knew the difference in cars (a bmw or a pinto...I couldn't tell!) or neighborhoods before I went to my high school. Also the diversity (not just race, but backgrounds, economic groups etc) just isn't there. However we did a lot of community service and field trips/overnight trips. So we were definitely aware of the real world.

I would just visit the private schools mulitple times. Do a drop in visit, don't just go to the scheduled visiting days. Also take in mind that tuition increases a LOT between kindergarten and high school. So if this school continues through the 12th grade, make sure you can afford the upper school (it would be pretty hard to pull your kid out then KWIM?) that includes books, activity fees etc.

Good luck!

 

[TheDizMom]

To me I think it is an issue of whether or not you are in a good school district or not. It also makes a difference if you are in a crowded system in terms of class size. I am not a huge fan of private school primarily because I was the product of a great public school system and I didn't much care for the private school kids I met growing up. My husband had the same feelings I did, and since we went to the same schools, we both had great experiences as kids. We did contemplate the private school thing but decided that our kids could get just as good an education in a public school. Our state also does not require that private school teachers be licensed, something I was not too keen on. Our DS started in 2 different districts (because of where we were living at the time), but our kids now go to the same district we graduated from. My MIL graduated from the same schools too, so they are now 3rd generation. The test scores are very highly ranked nationally, the elementary school my kids are in is a nationally recognized school, class sizes are good, there is a high number of National Merit Scholars, and the graduation rate is pretty close to 100%. My DH and I also have a large number of old school friends whose kids are going to school with ours. Because of these factors I am 100% sure I made the right choice for my kids. My friends and I seem to all end up back in the town we grew up in and want our kids to go to the schools we did. I don't think my kids will get a better education in a private school.

 

[lookingforward]

My daughter attends a magnet school that has a waiting list and lottery each year because it is an IB program. It has been a wonderful experience and it is quite rare to find a grade school with the IB curriculum. Our school district has an IB middle and high school that she can stream into if she wants. The curriculum works because they have very high test scores..and they focus on cultural diversity and the world around them. We were very blessed to have won the lottery for her spot. Dependent on the schools in question, of course, but I feel that she is better off there than at the private school she went to. In Florida grade schools have a limit, 18 to 22 kids per class, so overcrowding is never an issue.