OT - Gift basket ideas for 5yo who's Dad passed away suddenly?

[MickeyMom2Boys]

My son's preschool teacher stopped me this morning to tell me that one of my son's best friend's in the class Father passed away suddenly on Monday. That is such a delicate age for a child to have to deal with death! I feel so bad for him. I want to send them a gift basket specifically for the child. He is an only child and just turned 5 2 weeks ago. Does anyone have any ideas??

 

[luvmy3]

How awful for that boy's family.
I don't really have any good ideas, but maybe a nice stuffed animal that cold be used as a comforting friend.

 

[ADisneyQueen]

How about a nice soft blanket with a character that he likes? You could wrap the blanket around the stuffed animal with a big ribbon.
A nursery school board I was on gave this kind of gift to a child that had been attacked by a dog. It was a comforting gift.

 

[Momma2dakidz]

Honestly what i would do is get some gift cards, and some frozen kid friendly meals. Gift cards for fun activities would help both mom and child to have a smile. and dinner in a box ensures that even on the worst days the child will have a homecooked meal. I save frozen because they will have a ton of food for right now, but nothing gets given about a week later, and that is when reality sets in.

Another idea is getting them a giftcard to a bookstore so she can pick up a few books that she may need.

 

[melancholywings]

Seconding the gift card and frozen food idea. Or I'd ask if the mom has a fund set up (either for the situation or a child's college) and donate to that. Things are nice, but depending on their situation they might really need the money more.

 

[MickeyMom2Boys]

These are all very good suggestions - Thank you! I'll definitely do the stuffed animal/blanket then I'll try to add some activity stuff to keep him busy and try to find some gift cards for some things he and Mom can do together. Thank you all for the ideas.

 

[eeyorefan74]

A little photo album or frame for pictures of him and his dad, or maybe a children's book about losing someone you love- I think Maria Shriver wrote one, and I know there are other good ones, too.

 

[kitsch4]

Oh, how awful for that little boy. When my dad died, my kids were 2 and 6. The youth group at our church went to Build a Bear and made two bears for them and dressed them in clothes that looked like what a grandpa might wear. My kids called my dad "Papa", so these are their "Papa Bears". When the group gave my kids the bears, they had attached this poem to each one:

Heavenly Hugs Bear

When your Grandpa goes to Heaven,
it's awfully hard to "bear."
You miss his special company,
his precious love and care.
But day by day, God will help
to heal the hurt inside.
Meanwhile, here's a "Grandpa Teddy" to
snuggle up beside you.
Remember, every time you hug
this furry little friend,
You're being hugged from Heaven
with a love that never ends.

 

[amandaraye]

So sad. I hate to hear of young children left without a parent. My friend's BIL was killed last week in a car accident and left behind a 2 yo DD and a 7 YO DS.

Do you know of any special activity or interest the little boy had in common with his dad like fishing or cars or motorcycles, etc.? If so, maybe make a gist backet with the ideas others here have suggested and add some things that relate to what he and his dad enjoyed to do together.

I also think a nice homecooked meal that the Mom could freeze and make when she's ready would be nice.

 

[lucigo]

When my husband died my youngest was 5. Someone gave us the book Maria Shriver wrote called "what's heaven?" If you go on amazon and find that book there are several other suggestions of good books also. Another one I recommend is called "Water bugs and Dragonflies, explaining death to young children". My 5yo went back to sleeping with me, and she would half wake up in the middle of the night crying "why did my daddy have to die!" It was really awful for both of us. A few days after the funeral she sat on the bed and told me his pillow still smelled like him. Its amazing what a 5yo can understand. Prayers for this little guy!

 

[mommy-on-the-move]

How very sad.

The other ladies had some great gift ideas. I think one thing i'd also do is talk to his mom and offer her that you are happy to have him for playdates if and when she needs a break or has something that would be difficult to do with him. A friend of mine lost her partner and she said after the immediate aftermath all her family had returned back to their normal lives & mostly lived far away and it hit her most how very alone she was when it came to things like doctors appointments (pap test etc) that she'd relied on leaving the kids with her partner whilst she went alone. I think making a genuine offer that you can be relied on for that type of help would mean alot too. Also it'll give her son some sense of normality, in high school my friends mom died and it was hard to watch her go from being Abi to being the one whos mom died in everyones eyes and how they treated her.

 

[abdmom]

Here's a suggestion from someone who's been in that Mom's place: Please don't send presents - The little boy surely wants his dad, not stuff. Food is OK. Gift cards are OK. The most meaningful present would be playdates, not just one this week, but this week, next month, 6 months from now etc. Don't offer to help the mom if she "needs something". Right now, she has no idea what she needs. She won't call you. Please call her and just lend a listening ear. Call her up and offer to take her ds to your house, a movie, the museum etc for an afternoon so that she has time to do what she needs to be done. The devastation of what happened to that little family will not be something they get over in a week or a month. It will stay with them for years. It is usually about 3-5 years before some new normalcy will return for them.

 

[ALittleDisneyFan]

I would send a cookie bouquet basket. I use cookiesbydesign.com

 

[Momma2dakidz]

Please listen to abdmom. She is absolutely correct. It gets way harder then eases up a bit. She will really need the support. Call her up and say hey i am taking "x" to mcdonalds to burn off some energy can i take "y" with us to help wear "x" out? Would you like to join us?

You could also say "hey i hired a sitter (or whoever) for Thursday, i need to go start my shopping would you like to bring "y" over and we'll start our shopping together?

Let me tell you its hard to shop for holidays when you are alone and every little thing reminds you of th person you lost. I am so struggling this year trying to get my shopping done. I have left way too many stores in tears, it sucks to shop when your mind has time to wander and think.

Another offer i would have loved to have had is for a t-shirt quilt to be made. If you can sew ask her for 12 clothing items to turn into a quilt.