Okay boys and girls....

[goofy4tink]

I'm getting way too many complaints about nastiness here. So...here's the deal. If you choose to post something, and you don't care for the answers, or the way they are stated..please bring your complaints to me. I will try to give everyone the same treatment. No, the 'regulars' will not get preferential treatment. Of course, there are so few 'regulars' here now that it won't make much difference. Those cries of nastiness and rudeness have driven them off.

If someone has an issue with the moderating on this board, please contact a webmaster. I refuse to censure people. I rely on you all to play nicely and politely. But....I don't think that just because someone gives someone else an answer they weren't looking for, and one that doesn't suit what they want, is nasty or rude. Now...if it is worded in a rude or nasty manner, okay, all bets are off.

So...carry on. Play nicely. Consider yourselves sprinkled with pixie-dust...

 

[bavaria]

Is it time for this again already? You knew that I would say something, so sit down and have a chocolate Mom, while I say my piece.

Sadly many of the 'regular', helpful, knowledgeable posters have already been driven off this website, leaving a void of factual information here on the Transportation Board. For quite some time there has been a lack of response to threads, or a lot of misinformation posted. If that is what people want from here, so be it.

DIS Transportation Board v2009 is like a car with the kids screaming in the back seat 'MOM, he touched me! MOM, she's being mean to me!' Many of us chose to get out of the car long ago. I stupidly came back because of two reasons - my PM box was just getting too full from people asking for information, and I was seeing so much misinformation that I thought that maybe it was time to come and help out again.

I disagree with complaining to the webmasters about the moderation here, although I think that they do support your style. It would be a great loss to this community if our esteemed moderator was removed, or if the style here was changed, because some posters are sensitive or are reading things which are not there or are projecting themselves on a thread.

Transportation is the one subject here where only the facts count. Giving out misinformation, or telling people that 'they will be fine' when they won't just isn't helpful. It actually can hurt and cost a lot of money if people have the wrong information. Building false hope can create frustration as people start to expect things which just won't happen.

I do miss the regulars here, and that includes the many 'ordinary people' like Duds, and Deb, and Bumber and so many others who many not fly every week but who contributed facts and information from the viewpoint of a regular notsofrequently flying parent. But I for one refuse to spend my time giving out information in a non-emotional manner only to be criticised over and over by posters who don't like the answers, and blame the messenger. Even when we tried to inject humour over here we were accused of being cliquish or overly protective of one another.

For those of you who don't like the answers, or the delivery, maybe you need to step back a moment and consider your posts, and if they have been helpful to others. If they are only there to criticise, or to provide false information, or to build false hope, then they are not contributing in a positive fashion either.

This was once a vibrant, helpful, informative community and the only place I really enjoyed on this larger website, and it is really sad to see how some posters have completely driven this forum into a different direction.

I'm sorry that you, goofy4tink, have had to deal with these challenges on a daily basis. I'm quite certain that you didn't join and participate here with the intent of raising more children or moderating more playtime battles. I respect you personally and as a moderator, and it saddens me to know how difficult this 'job' must be for you.

 

[Luckymommyx2]

Is it time for this again already? You knew that I would say something, so sit down and have a chocolate Mom, while I say my piece......

I'm sorry that you, goofy4tink, have had to deal with these challenges on a daily basis. I'm quite certain that you didn't join and participate here with the intent of raising more children or moderating more playtime battles. I respect you personally and as a moderator, and it saddens me to know how difficult this 'job' must be for you.

Well said...ITA!

 

[Alesia]

I, for one, actually appreciate the lack of pixie dust on the transportation board. Why anyone would want someone to lie to them is beyond me...

 

[debster812]

Did someone call me??

I'm sorry that people's feelings are getting hurt, but it's the truth. With transportation, be it business or leisure, "Just the facts, ma'am" is really important.

We fly generally in the winter, usually in some sort of snow, hail, freezing rain, etc. The tips I learned here from our 'nasty' regulars helped me to salvage what was left of our trip, and helped score an upgrade to 1st class on our rescheduled flight.

Very well said Diane, and I promise, I'll try to be good too!

 

[crashbb]

I, for one, actually appreciate the lack of pixie dust on the transportation board. Why anyone would want someone to lie to them is beyond me...

I've been thinking about this. I don't think that it so much that people want to be lied to, it is that people want sympathy and/or validation.

When an airline charges them for overweight luggage, they don't want to be told that airline states the luggage limits and that people should carefully read such things before they fly (actually, before they buy their tickets). What they want is to be told that the airline is a big, bad, evil company and that they (the passenger) are a victim of cruelty.

The first scenario may actually help a future traveler, the second one, not so much.

And yes, I purposefully chose a complaint that I haven't seen here in a while, so as not to be accused of being "nasty" to anyone.

 

[goofy4tink]

I've been thinking about this. I don't think that it so much that people want to be lied to, it is that people want sympathy and/or validation.

When an airline charges them for overweight luggage, they don't want to be told that airline states the luggage limits and that people should carefully read such things before they fly (actually, before they buy their tickets). What they want is to be told that the airline is a big, bad, evil company and that they (the passenger) are a victim of cruelty.

The first scenario may actually help a future traveler, the second one, not so much.

And yes, I purposefully chose a complaint that I haven't seen here in a while, so as not to be accused of being "nasty" to anyone.

Thanks for that choice.
And you are right on the money as to what the issue is. Here's hoping we can move on and hand out some good info!!!!

 

[PrincessKsMom]

I cannot tell you how much comfort and confidence the Transportation Board has brought me as an infrequently flyer. I must say I was a little taken aback when I first posted here because of the lack of pixie dust. The TB definitely has a different tone than some of the other boards. However, I appreciated the fact that I would get the honest truth whether it was what I wanted to hear or not. I've come here time and again looking for advice and I've gotten just that -- good, sound, solid advice -- for free.

I hate that people who are willing to share their experience with others are being pushed out because of peoples' perception that they have been somehow slighted. You want someone to tell you what you want to hear, talk to your friends or family. You want the truth, come to the TB (if it's not too late).

 

[maxiesmom]

I hate that people who are willing to share their experience with others are being pushed out because of peoples' perception that they have been somehow slighted. You want someone to tell you what you want to hear, talk to your friends or family. You want the truth, come to the TB (if it's not too late).

You see, my TRUE friends will tell me the truth, if I want to hear it or not. And that is what I like about the Transportation board, it is more like hearing your friends tell you what you need to know to survive, and not people who claim to be friends just patting your head and telling you that you are right and everyone else is wrong.

Blindly agreeing with everyone and handing out false advice on this board can truly ruin someone's vacation. I sincerely hope we are not going to be forced in that direction by a few people who can't handle the facts without them being sugar-coated.

 

[bavaria]

I've been thinking about this. I don't think that it so much that people want to be lied to, it is that people want sympathy and/or validation.

There are essentially two types of posters who start threads here - those seeking information, and those seeking validation.

As I am not quite as nice as crashbb, I will cite some examples. Today someone started a thread asking about what to do regarding ID as her wallet was stolen. She was provided with information, links to websites, real life examples, and a little humour. She thanked everyone, and hopefully will put the information to good use. That is the type of poster who seeks information, and who is usually (but not always) grateful for the assistance. Sadly, there are also those seeking information who pose a question, receive a series of responses, and never even have the courtesy to say thank you for the information, even when some of us did quite a bit of research on their behalf.

Then we have the poster who comes seeking validation, usually for behaviour which they generally already know is against the airline policy or social norms. These are typically the people asking if they can bring on a too large/too many carry ons, or pack water in their suitcase, or bring PlayDough on the plane, etc. Depending on how they pose the question, they receive a variety of responses. As the question inherently asks how to break the rules or how to do something which negatively impacts others, they may also hear suggestions for how to do things differently. Typically these are the threads which become playground matches, full of name calling and finger pointing.

And that I frankly do not understand. If a very seasoned traveller told me something such as, well, for example, 'Packing pickled herring and liquer filled chocolate together in your suitcase is not the best idea, as you may find that herring juice seeps into your chocolate and that you end up with a permanent stench in your suitcase', I would most likely thank them for the advice. If another poster came along and gave me a link to where I could buy my chocolate online, I think that I would thank them as well.

Much of the behaviour that posters wish to have validated impacts other people, and is thus inconsiderate behaviour, even if they did not realise it. When their proposed actions impact others around them, I see nothing wrong with providing alternative solutions, and explaining exactly why that behaviour is antisocial. (Yes, Mom, I realise that you don't like my use of that term, but if you can suggest a better translation for ,Asozial' I will take the recommendation)

As someone else has pointed out, this is a discussion board with an open exchange of idea. It is not a validation board or a personal blog. Posters cannot expect to only read responses which agree with them.

I for one have always been humble enough to appreciate the information I gained by reading over at www.flyertalk.com and on other websites. By doing so, I have been able to enjoy my years of travel far more than if I blundered along with a lack of information. Yet many people seem to be resistant to learning, or seem to be ready to pick a fight. I meet those people quite often in airports, and have seen them here as well.

Airline travel really isn't as bad as people here make it out to be, or as Duds and I discuss, DISworld differs greatly from RealWorld. (Either that, or some of us just travel in a parallel universe to the rest of you)

 

[ftballfan7]

With airfares and rental rates up this year, after a few years of relatively "bargain" rates, there are likely to be an influx of travelers looking for advice for a variety of situations. Straight-forward, honest information I am sure is in everyone's best interest, reguardless of whether that information is what the original question-asker would like to hear. Unfortunately that information is sometimes followed by opinions which can come off as belittling or arrogant. That is really unnecessary.

I myself am looking for ways to save money on this years vacation, without putting myself in a situation where I become penny-wise and pound-foolish. You may very well see a question from me in the near future, relating to a particular set of circumstances. Hopefully if that happens, I will recieve truthful and honest advice given helpfully in a kind manner. Everyone here is looking for the same things, either to provide there families with a smooth and affordable as possible vacation experience or to provide others with information to help them reach that goal.

 

[Brian Noble]

Bavaria: you can have my Play-Doh when you pry it from my cold dead hands.

ftballfan: I'm actually seeing some decent airfares from DTW---better than last year. Rental car rates just stink, though. Right now, my employer-negotiated price cap (about $225/wk midsize + taxes/fees) is the best deal I can get anywhere. Usually, it's not even close.

 

[PrincessKsMom]

or bring PlayDough on the plane

Actually Brian, I believe Bavaria's reference to PlayDough was a veiled reference to my question about Lysol.

 

[Alesia]

Much of the behaviour that posters wish to have validated impacts other people, and is thus inconsiderate behaviour, even if they did not realise it. When their proposed actions impact others around them, I see nothing wrong with providing alternative solutions, and explaining exactly why that behaviour is antisocial. (Yes, Mom, I realise that you don't like my use of that term, but if you can suggest a better translation for ,Asozial' I will take the recommendation)

Antisocial is the right word. It's not the most common use of the word, but it is exactly correct. "Socially inept" would also work, and may be more easily understood.

 

[pooch]

so I promise to play nice.

 

[dburg30]

I feel for you Diane, I've moderated / run a website with a few thousand members for a 'non real life' type of board (computer gaming) and THAT place will make you want to pull your hair out. Then here you have the 'huggy, happy' sections, and then you have..... here . And I'm sure it has a lot to do with the other sections and people just really dont 'get' that this section can NOT be all hugs and sunshine. And I'm sure this forum is MUCH nicer then some of the other travel boards out there.


So, just keep up the good work, and if people dont like the way this place is run, they can go find somewhere else

 

[5DisneyNuts]

Bavaria, I agree with everything you said.

I'm sorry this thread had to be posted. I feel bad for the moderator who IMO does a great job here.

I mainly lurk here because as an infrequent traveler I don't have much to add. I enjoy the personalities and post when I have a question. IMO, the experts on this board go above and well beyond answering questions, providing links, maps and personal experiences. I have been very grateful for the help on more than one occasion.

I think it stinks that a select few who want to be told what they want to hear have the power to affect the factual answers that are provided here. Even worse is the attempt to drive off the people that provide the answers because their feelings are hurt.

Maybe more of us that mainly lurk and learn here should offer our opinions (nicely without snark, as requested) on the topic to balance things off.

I personally want to say thank you to Diane and all the "regulars" for all the things they contribute. I have never been offended by your comments

 

[livndisney]

Personally, I love that there is "no pixie dust on the transportation board". I wish more boards on the DIS were like that. I wish there were more boards to ask questions, get real answers and not have EVERYTHING turn into a debate.

 

[kaytieeldr]

I just wanted to point out, there's a recent post in the "Southwest early bird check-in" thread on this forum favorably comparing that thread to a similar topic on the (I think) Family board. If I remember correctly, the poster pointed out how much nicer or more polite the responses are on the Transportation thread!

 

[bumbershoot]

Blindly agreeing with everyone and handing out false advice on this board can truly ruin someone's vacation.

Truer words never spoken...
I just had this huge thing typed out about what my husband's company's travel agency has done to him with the business trip he's on...they have lost their minds OR they have never traveled internationally...I've only been to Ireland and Canada, and I could have booked this better than they have, and we're going to *have to* change one of his flights b/c it's absolutely impossible to make...but the base of the thoughts were...if even travel agencies are losing their minds and putting impossible flights together (he only had two hours today to get from a domestic terminal to the int'l, and he missed his flight as he was checking into it b/c of their timing)...we NEED sanity and plain truth here. This is a business trip...if the travel agency messes up, the company can take it up with them...but personal travel, yikes!

I'm sorry this thread had to be posted. I feel bad for the moderator who IMO does a great job here.

I'm sorry too, and I'm sorry if I said something wrong on that other thread.


Bavaria, you are too sweet. Must be all that chocolate.