Oh no, I messed up! ACK!

[MushyMushy]

So we were wrapping gifts and I came to the sickening realization that I hardly got my daughter ANYTHING. We ended up spending more than twice as much on DS as we did on her. We try so hard to do things equally with them. This is the first year I didn't keep a list, and honestly just threw everything together last minute. I feel really bad though.

DH was more than a little irritated with me.

I ended up writing her a "coupon" good for spending X amount of money either online or at the mall. I don't think she'll be at all upset, but it's so important to me to try to keep things equal between the kids, know what I mean? Especially now that she's a teenager.

I feel terrible. I'm usually so on the ball at Christmas, but this year my heart's just not in it. I didn't enjoy shopping (which is a great joy for me, buying things for loved ones), and I didn't enjoy decorating.

Oh well, thanks for listening to me whine.

 

[N&B'smom]

She'll understand!! Heck, she'll probably be thrilled! She's getting a shopping spree!!!

Shelby

 

[Ohiodislover]

How old is she. My DD, was upset that I bought her anything. It was all "Show me the money"

I've always been lucky that my girls haven't done that she got more than me crap too much. I do remember it w/ my brother though

Good Luck

 

[koolaidmoms]

I don't worry about giving them the same amount as DD gets lots of clothes and DS gets toys. Her clothes are actually much cheaper than his toys so she has more packages.

My problem is I shop clearance sales all year long and when it comes closer to Christmas I open up all the bags and boxes I keep in the attic and I have forgotten most of what I bought! Why would I buy three white princess sweatshirts all the same size? Old age is setting in.

 

[C.Ann]

What teenage girl wouldn't be thrilled with a "coupon" for shopping? It will probably be the best gift she receives..

 

[Bluestars]

I know what you mean, When all three kids lived at home, I would count the presents to make sure each kid had the exact same number of presents. I would even make a little spreadsheet to keep it organized and spend the same amount on each kid. (Yeah, overkill I know, but I am anal about having things be fair)

I think your daughter will be happy about getting money to spend herself. I think that's probably the best present a teenager could get. It'll be fine.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

You're doing the best you can with what you have available at the moment. Your dd will be ok and I think the shopping spree idea is wonderful.

I try to keep things kinda sorta equal, but that doesn't mean that all my kids get the same number of presents or that I spend exactly the same on each child, however my kids range in age from 9-21 (21yo today!), so I would go bonkers trying to keep things the same. I did a lousy job of it this year...very disorganized. Thankfully we celebrate Hanukkah, along with stockings for Christmas, so if I still need to buy anything for Hanukkah I can do so.

I have a marriage that's ending, along with a lot of other stuff going on....some good, some not-so-good, so the stress level is high. All will be ok, however, and I need to remember to take it one day at a time and remember what the season is all about.

I'm sorry that you're not in the spirit of things this Christmas. Hang in there.

 

[Feralpeg]

If it were my DD, I'd just tell her that I was taking her shopping and to lunch at the mall of her choice. She'd be thrilled. I'm sure your DD will feel the same.

 

[elizke]

It's so hard to get it right every year!

Maybe take one away from DS to make it more even and hide it away for him for the next occasion?

And some years are just harder to get into. It all gets so tiring and some years just don't seem to come together as well. I'm sure it's better than you think though, and I hope you have a merry day anyway!

 

[C.Ann]

Also wanted to add that I read an article today stating that the after Christmas sales this year are literally going to knock peoples socks off!! Many stores have already announced that everything from high ticket items to routine things will be reduced up to 90% so they can get rid of their inventories due to lack luster sales.. This will be across the board - electronics to clothing to toys.. Some of the stores I can remember off the top of my head were:

Home Depot
Walmart
Target
Macy's
Circuit City (liquidating their entire stores)

and I can't remember who all else..

If you give your DD money, she's going to end up with at least three times as much stuff as you could have purchased before Christmas!!

I'm thinking it wasn't such a "bad" thing after all..

Sorry the holidays have been so hard for you this year.. Soon they'll be over and at least that pressure will be off of you..

 

[Ohiodislover]

Also wanted to add that I read an article today stating that the after Christmas sales this year are literally going to knock peoples socks off!! Many stores have already announced that everything from high ticket items to routine things will be reduced up to 90% so they can get rid of their inventories due to lack luster sales.. This will be across the board - electronics to clothing to toys.. Some of the stores I can remember off the top of my head were:

Home Depot
Walmart
Target
Macy's
Circuit City (liquidating their entire stores)

and I can't remember who all else..

If you give your DD money, she's going to end up with at least three times as much stuff as you could have purchased before Christmas!!

I'm thinking it wasn't such a "bad" thing after all..

Sorry the holidays have been so hard for you this year.. Soon they'll be over and at least that pressure will be off of you..

I agree. I was in Target tonight. They gave an additional 30 percent off the clearance. I got 3 piece sets of PJs for $9.00.

My girls are getting an after Christmas shopping trip. I just can't judge the sizes, or their preferences. I think they will be thrilled, and I'm syked

 

[C.Ann]

I agree. I was in Target tonight. They gave an additional 30 percent off the clearance. I got 3 piece sets of PJs for $9.00.

My girls are getting an after Christmas shopping trip. I just can't judge the sizes, or their preferences. I think they will be thrilled, and I'm syked

--------------
I can't get out to the stores to do any "after Christmas shopping", but they did mention that many of these deals will be available on-line too, so I'll be keeping my eyes open for two electronic items I would like for myself - but would have to be dirt cheap in order for me to buy..

On the other hand, when I mentioned this to DD's MIL tonight, she whipped out her little note pad from her purse and started making a list already..

 

[S. C.]

What teenage girl wouldn't be thrilled with a "coupon" for shopping? It will probably be the best gift she receives..

If it were my DD, I'd just tell her that I was taking her shopping and to lunch at the mall of her choice. She'd be thrilled. I'm sure your DD will feel the same.

I agree! She will love it.

 

[kellyg403]

I also hate when the number of gifts are not fair. As they got older I still hated the fact that I knew monetarily it was fair. If the truth be known, last year after wrapping all the presents I realized one dd was short by two gifts. I thought oh well, it will be fine. I went to bed, tossed and turned because I kept thinking about it. So at 3 in the morning I got up, got dressed and drove to Walgreen's since I knew it was open 24 hours and got those two darn gifts and bag, made it home and put it under the tree. I slept soundly until 8. Do you know that her favorite 2 gifts were those two things I got from Walgreen's in the middle of the night.

I think the coupon idea is great. I give the girls gift cards now and few gifts under the tree. On friday after Christmas, I take the day off and cart them around to all the stores they want to go to to spend their money. Really, it is easier on me. I have no sense of style or taste any more!

Kelly

 

[Briarmom]

I would love a shopping spree.

 

[MushyMushy]

I have a marriage that's ending, along with a lot of other stuff going on....some good, some not-so-good, so the stress level is high. All will be ok, however, and I need to remember to take it one day at a time and remember what the season is all about.

I'm sorry that you're not in the spirit of things this Christmas. Hang in there.

I'm sorry things have been rough for you as well. I hope next year is a good start for your new life.

It's so hard to get it right every year!

Maybe take one away from DS to make it more even and hide it away for him for the next occasion?

And some years are just harder to get into. It all gets so tiring and some years just don't seem to come together as well. I'm sure it's better than you think though, and I hope you have a merry day anyway!

DS only got two things this year. A dartboard from his sister and a wallet full of cash from us.

I was laughing with DH because my son has been asking for cash every year since he was in his early teens. I always balked at it and told him in no uncertain terms to forget it. I don't know what got into me this year, but I knew the cash would make him happiest, so I did it.

And I realized later -- this is the first year he didn't ask for cash. He'll be pleasantly surprised.

I think the rest of you are right -- she'll like the shopping. She loves Hot Topic and has had her eye on some hoodies there, so this is her chance to splurge.

 

[MerMom60_94]

Hey Mushy Mushy, Merry Christmas! How did everything turn out? I'm sure both children are old enough to know the things that you've been going through. I'll bet they'll be happy with all they get - including your daughters mall certificate. I hope you all have a wonderful holiday together.

 

[chobie]

I also hate when the number of gifts are not fair. As they got older I still hated the fact that I knew monetarily it was fair. If the truth be known, last year after wrapping all the presents I realized one dd was short by two gifts. I thought oh well, it will be fine. I went to bed, tossed and turned because I kept thinking about it. So at 3 in the morning I got up, got dressed and drove to Walgreen's since I knew it was open 24 hours and got those two darn gifts and bag, made it home and put it under the tree. I slept soundly until 8. Do you know that her favorite 2 gifts were those two things I got from Walgreen's in the middle of the night.

I think the coupon idea is great. I give the girls gift cards now and few gifts under the tree. On friday after Christmas, I take the day off and cart them around to all the stores they want to go to to spend their money. Really, it is easier on me. I have no sense of style or taste any more!

Kelly

Now, I feel guilty. I, too was tossing and turning last night because my son will have more than twice as many gifts to unwrap as my daughter. I actually spent more on her, but still it doesn't seem right. Never thought of going to Walgreens. I'm hoping when she sees the tickets to Legally Blond The Musical all will be forgiven. That's the only thing she asked for.

 

[MushyMushy]

Hey Mushy Mushy, Merry Christmas! How did everything turn out? I'm sure both children are old enough to know the things that you've been going through. I'll bet they'll be happy with all they get - including your daughters mall certificate. I hope you all have a wonderful holiday together.

She was thrilled with the "coupon"! I'm so glad. Also, I promised her that she could buy whatever she wanted and I wouldn't stop her. But made it clear that I might not necessarily let her wear it to school. Now I'm nervous.

DS was happy with his cash. He went right back to bed, though.

 

[Micca]

I promised her that she could buy whatever she wanted and I wouldn't stop her. But made it clear that I might not necessarily let her wear it to school. Now I'm nervous.

Congrats on your daughter's new tattoo

Just kidding Mushy. Happy Christmas