O.j. No Longer “100% Sure” He Is Innocent

[fklhou]

O.J. NO LONGER “100% SURE” HE IS INNOCENT

Calls Johnnie Cochran’s Recent Statements ‘Thought Provoking’

Days after former O.J. Simpson defense attorney Johnnie Cochran admitted he is no longer 100% certain that his client was innocent, Mr. Simpson today said that his attorney had planted “fresh seeds of doubt” in his own mind.

“For years, I’ve been pretty sure that I did not murder my wife,” Mr. Simpson said today at a golf course in Boca Raton, Florida, where he was taking a rare break from searching for the real killers of his wife. “But if Johnnie’s not 100% sure, I’m like, hey, maybe I better take another look at this.”

Mr. Simpson added that it would be “crazy” not to be swayed by Mr. Cochran’s new statements, which he called “thought provoking.”

“Look, you’re talking about a guy, Johnnie Cochran, who is a pretty smart guy,” Mr. Simpson said. “If he said maybe I did it, then maybe I did it.”

Mr. Cochran’s doubts about Mr. Simpson’s innocence may help resolve one lingering mystery for the former Heisman Trophy winner: why it has been so difficult for him to find his wife’s real killers, whom he pledged to hunt down after his acquittal in 1995.

The former NFL star said that, in light of the new revelations, he may slow down his search, which he said has occupied almost every waking moment of his life for the past seven years.

“If it turns out that I’m actually the one who did it, then looking for the real killers would be a big old waste of time,” Mr. Simpson said.


****Borowitz Reports****

 

[A kid at heart]

Who does he think he is kidding?

 

[chell]

Did he bump his head recently?

 

[Beauty]

Is this serious?

 

[Wagamama]

no....its from a satire news site.

 

[luv2nascar]

the glove didn't fit
they had to aquit

 

[idontknow]

My favorite sketch on SNL is when one of them dressed up like of and he was a commontator(sp) for a football game. He was showing the last play. They had a shot of the line up and "OJ" was righting his X and O over the players and showing where they ran and where they should have ran to actually make the play. As he is writing out the Xs and Os, he spells out "I DID IT" on the board. It was the most hysterical thing I've seen in a long time on SNL. It was a cheap laugh, but it was one of the first time I'd seen someone come out and say he did it.