Non-religious people - Would you send your child to Mom's Day Out at a church?

[GEM]

First off, most of you probably know that we are not a religious family at all. I guess we could best be described as agnostic. I don't really know what the truth is, and I don't believe anybody else does either. That said, we do respect all religions and we will encourage our child to learn as much as possible about all sorts of different religions.

Paul has never gone to day care. My work is very flexible and I set my own hours. Usually, I just go into the office a few days a week. He goes and spends Thursdays with his grandma, and I work all day on that day. I also usually go in on Tuesday mornings, and he has a babysitter then.

I found out from a friend a few weeks ago that the huge Baptist church down the street from us runs what seems to be a great Mother's Day Out program. They have a great facility with a huge fenced playground, lots of fun toys and equiment, a great ratio of staff to kids, etc. - and it's very inexpensive, much less than what we're paying our babysitter. It would cost $20 a day for me to have him there from 9am to 2pm on Tuesdays, plus they would feed him lunch! I think Paul would enjoy that a lot, plus it would give him the chance to interact with some kids his age. You don't have to be a church member or anything to sign up.

I guess I'm just a little hesitant to send him to a chuch related program, which I know sounds bad. I don't think they'll be preaching fire and brimstone to the kids or anything, just Bible verses and songs and things like that. I guess I'm just worried about confusing him. I know I said I was open to exposing him to different religions, but I guess I was thinking more about when he was old enough to discuss it and understand different view points. He's 21 months old now. This is the only program like this in town. None of the day cares will take a kid just once a week. I know the socialization and all of that would be great for him, and the price and location are great for me. I'm just having second thoughts about the chuch aspect.

So, what do you guys think. I'd like to hear your opinions.

 

[caitycaity]

i would do it. it sounds like it would be a good opportunity for him to socialize with other kids.

 

[MomofKatie]

Well, here's my take on the situation.

We aren't religious, either. After some research, we sent DD to preschool at a local Lutheran church. She loved it, and it turned out fine. However, we decided against putting her into a Baptist preschool that was cheaper and closer to home. Why? The literature we got from them seemed to imply that the religious part of the school was way too prevalent. And any time I've been to Baptist (or Pentacostal) churches, especially here in the South, there has been too much emphasis on the "being saved or else" way of thinking. I know I'll probably get blasted for this view, but I'd seriously think about looking into a less "gung-ho" church than the Baptists . Are there any others in your area that offer Mom's Day Out? Maybe Lutheran or Episcopal? Just my opinion- take it with a grain of salt.

 

[Kimberle]

Well, why don't you go for a tour and ask them exactly what their program entails?

Generally, at under 3 years of age, most programs consist of diaper changing, naps, and playtime.

Only *you* can answer where or not you'll be comfortable with the program. I don't think you'll really know until you visit.

 

[tar heel]

Visit and ask questions. You probably would have been comfortable in the church-related programs my kids attended. While the preschool programs were under the education minister, the director was very much in charge. The religious indoctrination consisted of a blessing before snack ("A, B, C, D, E, F, G -- Thank you God for feeding me" was one of them) and celebrations in a fairly secular way of Christmas and Easter. Classes at our second preschool did do a craft with the Christmas story in it and the children's minister visited and told the story using a big blocky manger scene. Of course, Santa and the Easter bunny also visited! I don't remember Bible verses ever being used.

Teachers and students came from a variety of religious backgrounds and there definitely was NOT a litmus test for their beliefs. Two of the three church preschools my three kids attended had Jewish students.

Are you talking about enrolling him next year? In both places we've lived, it was really hard to get into half-day programs for kids under 2.

 

[CynJ]

How about a visit?

Go and look it over - and share your feelings about religion with the staff - see what you get back from them.

If its the only one of its type around -you may find that its more diverse then you might think.

 

[BARBARAAPPLE]

We Sent Our Dd To A Church Organized Mothers Morning Out Program And She Loved It An Enjoyed Being With The Other Kids. It Helped Her Learn How To Deal With Other Children Her Own Age ..

I Would Do It Again If I Had To.

Go Take A Tour And See How Other Children Are Doing There !!!

 

[HappyMommy2]

I agree that you really need to go and find out exactly what your little boy's program would entail. It could be anything from playtime+snack+naps+craft to a full Christian baby "curriculum." What he will be doing and learning in his class will have a lot to do with your comfort level.
Don't worry that your questions sound "bad" at all! Of course you want your son to be in an environment that is best for him and for your family. We are a Christian family and we DO send our kids to a Christian preschool precisely because we want what they are learning in their school to reinforce what we are teaching them at home. On the other hand I know a lot of the kids in my kids' preschool are from agnostic families like yours, and the parents just chose this preschool because it is a very warm and loving place, good hours, good price, great teachers, etc. The kids aren't sent home with instructions to convert their parents, LOL! But they do come home singing cute Bible songs and presenting cute crafts that say "Jesus loves me" so the parents have to be comfortable with at least that sort of thing.

It's great that you are so concerned with doing what is best for your little guy. I love your signature pic BTW!

 

[Beth76]

Yes, ask them how much the church is involved. I send my son to a presbyterian MDO program. It's just wonderful. I know they sing some bible songs and they say "God is great, God is good....." at lunch time. But, I think that's it.

We're not religious, but were both brought up religious. I do send my son to Sunday School with my mom. He likes it and it gives us a break on Sunday mornings. I would be a total hyporcrite if I purposely kept my son from going to sunday school/church if it's something he enjoys. It keeps my mom off my back too.

If he does pick up on some of the religion, it would probably just be reciting songs. He probably wouldn't really understand the meaning at this time. Like you said, I doubt they would be discussing hell and other heavy topics at the preschool level.

 

[DissyLove]

We had something of a similar experience. I am Methodist, and consider myself a Christian, but don't attend church for a number of reasons, mostly I am not comfortable with the regular church "requirements"

My husband is a lapsed catholic, who wants nothing to do with organized religion. However, our local community was offering a summer activities program, that my kids wanted to do. It was sponsored by one of the churches.

We let them go, and they loved it. They did end up singing a few "campfire" type songs with religious themes, but other than that, they just got to play with other kids and do some neat activities. The people who ran the program were members of the church, but none of the regular activities were religion-based. I will probably send them again next summer if they want.

If you want to expose your child to religion while keeping your own system, than I think it would be fine for you. I don't expect at that age that there will be much religion taught in their daily experience.

 

[welovedisneyx4]

I would go visit and ask about the extent of the religion that is brought into the program.

While we are a religious family, we had some concerns about sending our kids to a certain church daycare. We are Presbyterians, (not a Bible thumping, fire and brimstone church at all) but the daycare was at a much more "conservative" denomination. We were kind of worried about what exactly they would be teaching. Well, DD went there for 3 years and DS went there for 2 years and we didn't have any problems w/ that at all! They would have a prayer before lunch and some "Chapel" time and they would use religious color pages and activites (right along w/ secular), but they never went overboard at all. (We were always watching for it!!!) There were the songs and sayings, but there was never any pressure on the kids or the parents about it.

I just read HappyMommy2's response and have to say ITA w/ it. This daycare also had kids whos families were agnostic and they were there b/c it was a great place for your kids. That is the most important thing!!

Good luck!! It can be so hard deciding about people to take care of your kids!!!

 

[Buckalew11]

Gem, My sister sent all of her kids to a church's MDO and she is not a Christian. She seemed fine with it. It was even a Baptist one. My DD went there also. I felt it lacked a bit in what I wanted out of a church's MDO but since it was good with my sister, I was happy that she wasn't pressured, visited, turned-off etc. None of her kids go to church at this point so it didn't brainwash them. Good luck! It sounds like a good opportunity for your son and you!

 

[jennyl772003]

My son goes to after-school care at a Lutheran church. There is not a lot of religion in the program, but there are posters and things on the wall of a religious nature. They really don't seem to "push" it though. Maybe some coloring pages and pencils brought home with a religious theme.

He likes the teachers, and the price is great.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I would go visit and ask about the extent of the religion that is brought into the program.

Ditto this. I did send my dd (who is 13 now) to the Baptist Preschool/Daycare. We are Catholic but I am like you I don't mind exposing my children to other religions.
BUT...
It turns out my dd was not to found of it. It was pretty religious and there "mission" is to convert. She was treated differently because we were not church members.
Not that is was "bad" or anything it just wasn't a good fit.

My second dd I found a place that was not religious and was MUCH HAPPIER with it.

They only way to know is to try it out.

 

[NMAmy]

My belief system sounds fairly close to yours and I didn't send dd to any religious programs because of that. The ones in the area we were living did have a lot of religion in the program and I wasn't comfortable with dd getting conflicting information--i.e. creationism. I'd doublecheck, as others have said, with the school and see what's involved and what information is stressed and see if you're comfortable with it.

 

[luvmarypoppins]

I would say go and check it out first and see what kind of curriculum they use. There is no sense sending him there and then pull him out if you dont like the religious aspects of the program or what they are teaching. I have to say that Mothers Day Out was a blessing for my 3 ds. I never heard of it before and when we moved over 1,000 from our family and I had no friends, etc, no relatives to watch my kids and with 3 kids under 4 it was the only place where I knew they were safe, loved, cared for etc, and I had sanity for those precious 2 days a week. Alot of my ds mdo teachers did not even attend that church. We are religious so I really didnt have a problem with that part of it, but I saw teachers taking time to talk to moms whos marriages were falling apart etc. Our ds came home with a monthly calendar of events etc. It was mostly doing letter and number recognition, sharing etc, a small coloring or gluing craft etc. Yes they did hear bible songs and storys, I know they did put a big emphasis on christmas and easter religiously. Another girl I met through my dh work said at her sons mdo all he did was play, they didnt even do the letter or number stuff. So I guess it depends what kind of reputation the mdo had. As you said the class size is pretty small and the price is so reasonable too. They even helped with potty training when the time came. etc. Best of luck in your decision and little Paul is a cutie, getting bigger all the time!!