Niece getting married in HI - how to go on a budget?

[thebeesknees]

My niece just got engaged and is planning a destination wedding to Hawaii in November. We don't have the exact date yet, but she wants it a week or two before Thanksgiving. I've never been to HI, and the thought of trying to get 5 of us there is really scaring me, but she and her family have made it very clear that they expect us to be there. DH only has his sister and her family here in the US, so we are the closest family they have around. Everyone else is overseas. We are toying around with maybe having just DH and me go, as tickets for 5 are going to cost $$$, and it is our 10th anniversary this year, so maybe we could kill 2 birds with one stone. I do have enough frequent flier miles to get 2 of us there. Anyway, has anyone gone and done it on a budget? Are there any places to stay you would recommend in the Honolulu area that won't break the bank? We aren't fancy people, so we just want something clean and comfortable - we don't need ocean views or deluxe accommodations. Thanks so much. Oh, and any other budget tips you might have for HI would be greatly appreciated!

 

[Pigeon]

I guess I wouldn't give a hoot what their expectations are. No way is that going to be a "budget" trip anyway you do it.

 

[bigbabyblues]

I've never been to HI, and the thought of trying to get 5 of us there is really scaring me, but she and her family have made it very clear that they expect us to be there. DH only has his sister and her family here in the US, so we are the closest family they have around. Everyone else is overseas.

This part really strikes me as rude (from them, not you). If they "expect" you to be there, they should be paying for your airfare. I completely understand why they would want you to come, but that is a long trip and a large expense to demand from someone.

I think the idea of going for the wedding and celebrating your 10th is a great one, what an anniversary trip! I'd love to go to HI, but it's not in our budget and won't be for a long time. Are they going to have hotel reservations for everyone going, or is it a find your own hotel trip? DH's cousin booked a block of rooms in her city for wedding guests, and she got some kind of a group rate. I think it was only a slight discount (and this was 15 years ago), but every little bit helps.

Good luck!

 

[marlynnp]

I guess I wouldn't give a hoot what their expectations are. No way is that going to be a "budget" trip anyway you do it.

I agree. I could see them 'expecting' you to attend if it were local.

Bottom line is - I don't let other people spend MY money.

Even if I wanted to go there someday, if the dollars weren't in the budget now for me to go on the type of vacation I would normally plan I wouldn't go.

 

[antmaril]

They have no power over you. If you cannot afford a trip to Hawaii for your niece's wedding, don't go. If you can fit into the budget, then, and only then, do you even consider it.

 

[sk!mom]

she and her family have made it very clear that they expect us to be there. Anyway, has anyone gone and done it on a budget? Are there any places to stay you would recommend in the Honolulu area that won't break the bank? We aren't fancy people, so we just want something clean and comfortable - we don't need ocean views or deluxe accommodations. Thanks so much. Oh, and any other budget tips you might have for HI would be greatly appreciated!

Honestly, even "on a budget" Hawaii is a costly destination. If you go with only 2 and use miles for the airfare then you could use Priceline for a room deal.

I wouldn't let someone's expectations cause me to spend money that I didn't have or didn't want to allocate in that way. People who have destination weddings have made the choice that the destination is more important than the guests because there is always someone that they'd like to come who won't be able to make it.

 

[mrsklamc]

My first thought was "If you choose a destination wedding, then you accept that some people won't be able to make it." But it sounds like OP does want to go and is just looking for suggestions on how to make it affordable.

OP, where in the islands is the wedding?

 

[canadianjovigirl]

Hawaii is far from budget. To keep costs down i would rent a condo off vrbo.com and that way could save on meals even though food is more expensive there, it is cheaper than eating out all the time.

 

[suz1974]

I am by far not a Hawaii expert, but I am very CHEAP We went this summer and stayed at the Park Shore Waikiki and got a pretty good deal. It is part of the Aqua chain of hotels and is right across from the beach. We had a small kitchen (microwave, sink,and fridge) We shipped a case of water from Costco directly to our hotel to be waiting for us when we got there (a tip I picked up on this board) I think it was like 7 bucks shipped, we are not costco members so they charged a surcharge of about 50 cents. We also brought a small cooler with things like pop tarts, peanut butter and jelly, loaf of bread, etc. So that we didn't have to eat out every meal. Most times we ate out it was quite expensive. We didn't rent a car. They have an excellent public transportation system called simply The Bus. Although, I have heard it is cheap to rent a car. We got to the hotel by a transport that was there at the airport $15 round trip/pp. And we mostly did excursions on our own, such as snorkeling at hanauma bay. We loved it there, if you do decide to go have fun!!

 

[bucket o' butter]

My first thought was "If you choose a destination wedding, then you accept that some people won't be able to make it." But it sounds like OP does want to go and is just looking for suggestions on how to make it affordable.

OP, where in the islands is the wedding?

I agree. (The part about expecting you to be there is a bit rude though) Anyway, since you have frequent flyer miles, I would think you could do it. I would just make it an anniversary present for you and DH and enjoy yourself. Find a hotel on Priceline. Of course it isn't going to be cheap, but surely you can find one that isn't ridiculous. I would think that November would be an off season month. I think food is what will be the expensive part. Maybe try to find a condo where you could do some cooking there. Although groceries are quiet expensive in Hawaii, so if it is just two of you, it might be cheaper to just go out. I think if you can afford it and start saving now, you should go. Have a great time and keep looking for bargains!

 

[Styx Fan]

My first thought was if they really expect you to go, then they should be having the wedding stateside. They have no right to expect you to go to HI at all, let alone with 3 small children. I really think people who have destination weddings are in most cases choosing the location over the guests.

With that being said..........be sure to check if they are reserving a block of rooms. I would be afraid, however, they would be picking some place very expensive that would give them a discount on their bridal suite, so be prepared to stay elsewhere.

If you choose to go, I would really go without the kids if you can....long trip and much more expensive to take them. I love the idea of rolling it into a special 10th trip for the 2 of you

 

[soccerchick]

I assume when you say Honolulu that you mean Waikiki? There are lush places to stay and there are reasonable ones. We stayed 2 blocks (I think) back from the beach. We did priceline for our place and it was okay (I'll look it up). I second the VRBO, especially if you choose to stay in Honolulu for the wedding (Priceline or Hotwire) and then go somewhere nicer and get a VRBO (North Shore) for your anniversary.

There is a Costco in Honolulu, so you can get snacks, water and food there (if you wish to cook and have a kitchen in your place).

Must do's = Pearl Harbor and Diamond Head and the North Shore. PH is free, you just have to get a ticket. DH was like $5 to park.

Another great lookout for pics/views was a state park off of Tantalus (sp?) drive - a crazy winding road.

Go to the library or book store and get this book: http://www.wizardpub.com/oahu/oahu.html

 

[disneysteve]

I would suggest checking out vrbo.com and see if there are some nice rental places close to where you need to be. I helped my office manager rent a beautiful condo in Maui for her honeymoon a few years ago through vrbo. Vacation rentals can be much more affordable than hotels with a lot more space and a full kitchen so you can prepare some simple meals yourself to further reduce costs (just like at Disney when we stay offsite in a condo or pool home).

 

[kaleighmariesmom]

Me and DH got married in Hawaii in 2005. We are from Boston and IN NO WAY expected that anyone HAD to go. If they wanted too - great. Saying that only like 10 people went. It was fine with us. We lived in CA at the time so it was different for us. Everyone booked their rooms/cars/tickets on their own where they wanted to go. Again we were fine with that.

My sister stayed at Turtle Bay (which was WAY expensive) my other sister stay on Wakiki Beach at a cheaper hotel. They both used miles to get their flights. My mom and I used priceline.com we booked like 6 months in advance so we got pretty good deals (in our eyes) I think my mom paid $1000 for her flight and hotel.

I cant think of anything else of the top of my head but if you have any questions feel free to ask.

 

[ceecee]

No way is HI budget. Cooking in your room won't help a lot either because the groceries are really expensive, $8.00 for milk??? I can't see how they expect you to be there (especially a family of 5), when you choose a destination wedding (especially there) you can expect most or all of the RSVPs to be no's unless they are footing part of the costs, maybe the hotel? A friend of mine went to a wedding in Chicago and the hotel and a babysitter (for the reception dinner) was included.

 

[connie1042]

When we went, we rented Condos, and split the cost with another couple. Is there anyone you could share a condo with?

 

[cm8]

My niece just got engaged and is planning a destination wedding to Hawaii in November. We don't have the exact date yet, but she wants it a week or two before Thanksgiving. I've never been to HI, and the thought of trying to get 5 of us there is really scaring me, but she and her family have made it very clear that they expect us to be there. DH only has his sister and her family here in the US, so we are the closest family they have around. Everyone else is overseas. We are toying around with maybe having just DH and me go, as tickets for 5 are going to cost $$$, and it is our 10th anniversary this year, so maybe we could kill 2 birds with one stone. I do have enough frequent flier miles to get 2 of us there. Anyway, has anyone gone and done it on a budget? Are there any places to stay you would recommend in the Honolulu area that won't break the bank? We aren't fancy people, so we just want something clean and comfortable - we don't need ocean views or deluxe accommodations. Thanks so much. Oh, and any other budget tips you might have for HI would be greatly appreciated!

Hi, I used to live in HI and still have family there. Are either of your military? If so you can check out staying at the Hale-koa and it will save you some $$$$. Also it is in the heart of Waikiki, so it will be well worth it. Also If you buy your tickets for air travel, try to get them from over there. They are way cheaper and they can be mailed to you from the travel agency. Also, how much money are you looking to spend total, I can get you some great leads if you get me some critical information. I hope that you are able to make it and have a lovely time as well

 

[mnrose]

I would suggest checking out vrbo.com and see if there are some nice rental places close to where you need to be. I helped my office manager rent a beautiful condo in Maui for her honeymoon a few years ago through vrbo. Vacation rentals can be much more affordable than hotels with a lot more space and a full kitchen so you can prepare some simple meals yourself to further reduce costs (just like at Disney when we stay offsite in a condo or pool home).

I was going to say the same thing! I've gone to Hawaii several times on the ultra cheap by renting condos through VRBO. A quick look shows quite a number in Honolulu for under $100 a night, which would be very reasonable by Hawaii standards. I think there is a Costco somewhere on Oahu, which would make meals uber cheap, and not much different than staying home. There are also many restaurants where the "locals" eat that are not all that expensive. Stay away from the beachfront tourist places, and you will be fine.

You can spend a ton of money there, but it isn't necessary. There are many beaches which are beautiful, and free.

The airfare is the expensive part of a Hawaii trip these days, and if you have that taken care of with FF miles, I'd go and enjoy myself with your husband for your anniversary.

Here's an example of what I found:
http://www.vrbo.com/180850

$75 a night. Nothing wrong with that place for two!

 

[thebeesknees]

Thank you all so much for the advice so far! We will definitely be looking into some of the hotels/condos you mentioned. I really would like to make this work for me and DH alone, no kids. I think if it is just the two of us, we can do it and stay within a reasonable budget. I talked to my SIL tonight and they found a deal that is $800 per person including flight, hotel and car for 6 nights. So it just might be doable, especially if we use our miles. I am getting excited about seeing some of these beautiful places that I have only read about so far.

 

[findmewdw]

My family went to Hawaii in October. We stayed at Aston Waikiki Beach Hotel and I think it was around 149. It was very nice. Be sure to check trip advisor boards for lots of Hawaii info. WE have done VRBO for other beach locations and I would check into that. We highly recommend Hawaii 23 for transportation pickups too. We were a family of four and total for pickup from airport to hotel was 23. You can google them for more info. Very nice and professional and gave us lots of info.
We were only in Waikiki pre and post cruise, but I know you can find some deals. I saw another poster mentioned the cost of food. Milk at the ABC Stores, convenient stores, was around 8. However at groceries not right in the city, it was much cheaperI think we saw some around 4. Also, groceries had great prepared sandwiches that weren't too high. You will fall in love with Hawaii and you will be so glad that you went. Check out Costco, too. A friend got a great deal from a travel agent there.
Since you have frequent travel miles, you are already ahead of the game. Airfare is what killed us. We couldn't find cheap airfare on planes that I would fly on! Our tickets were 650 each.
Good luck!