New to the Marine Corp Family please help

[Mickeyistheman]

I didn't know where else to turn to for my venting.

My brother has only been a Marine for about 9 months now and he is doing his first tour in Iraq in about a week and half.

He was able to get a few days leave before he goes and now we have been told that "Things can Change" and it is soooo frustrating!!!! We are trying to book him a flight home but he doesn't know exactly what time they will let them go. I mean come on seriously he is going to be paying an arm and a leg and he'll be lucky if he is home for 24 hours. He said he just wants to sleep in his bed one more time, eat my mothers chicken soup (his fave), grandma's goulash (another fave) play with is dogs and then he'll be ready to leave.

I am getting emotional just typing this because I don't want him to go. He said he is ready and wants to go but as his family we just want him to be safe along with his platoon.

Plus I am also mad at the airlines because the flights that he needs just don't exist anymore and getting him home is going to be such a chore. Is it worth it to see him again yes of course just frustrating.

Any advice is most helpful. I know once he leaves its only going to get worse for me.

 

[Piglet4Ever]

There isn't much I can say but I feel you pain. Unfortunately that is how it seems to go with the military life. Plans can change on a moments notice and you just have to learn how to go with the flow, no matter how much it sucks. I've been a Navy wife for going on 12 yrs and have had my share of disapointments, but the good things that the military has given my family outway all that and the thought that my DH is doing his bit to protect our country and it's citizens makes it all worth while to us. We really are all a big family, disfunctional at times, but a family that cares about each none the less. Good luck to you and your family, I really hope that your brother gets to come home for a visit and I appreciate what he is doing for our country.

 

[Stephanie218]

Just wanted to echo Piglet4ever. It is very hard dealing with the schedules, but there's not much you can do. We've definitely paid an arm and a leg for tickets before, unfortunately. I hope he's able to come home before he leaves. My DH is also in Iraq as well - I hope your son has a quick and safe deployment.

 

[Mickeyistheman]

Thank you so much for your kind words.

My brother is deploying, I know I sound like his mother, haha.

If all goes well we are going to surprise my parents and just bring him home from the airport!!

I find myself crying when I think about him, I have tried to get it under control but it is just difficult right now, it is still so fresh that he is leaving for 7 months. I mean we can talk to him on a regular basis once he goes over there, it won't be happening as often and, yesterday my boss sent out a cute email that it was 4 months till Christmas....that's great but my brother wont' be here.

I really would like to go away because it is going to be VERY hard for the family. We are just trying to be strong for him and not get emotional too much in front of him. I know saying good bye this time is going to be the worst for all of us.

I am just glad that I have a great new job and that I will put all of my attention and effort into making more money etc.

 

[Stephanie218]

Thank you so much for your kind words.

My brother is deploying, I know I sound like his mother, haha.

If all goes well we are going to surprise my parents and just bring him home from the airport!!

Sorry, I must have missed that you said brother! The goodbye's are the worst...Once he's gone, you'll start to get into a routine and it will be a lot better. Hope everything goes well in the next few weeks.

 

[Mickeyistheman]

Thanks Stephanie!!

They moved up his date to leave which I am looking at it like the sooner he is over there and gets the job done the quicker he will be home.

We have an angel network and they update us on things going on.

Its nice that even though our boys are away we can connect and keep ourselves busy.

I am quite worried about my mother though, she has not been eating at all or sleeping well. She has lost about 36 lbs and not in a good way either.

I try to get her to come out with me or do something to get her mind off of things at least for a little while.

I am afraid that she is going to give herself a heart attack because she is so stressed and she also is still looking for work, once she has a job lined up I think she will be better.

She worked for a great Dr. but he passed away suddenly so that didn't help matters either.

I am just glad that I have the Dis, otherwise things would be more difficult for me.

 

[Piglet4Ever]

I feel sorry for your Mom having such a hard time with your brother leaving, maybe she needs to see someone to work through her feelings. Like it or not your brother picked a dangerous line of work to get into and it isn't good for him either to have to worry about how your mom is handling him being gone. He needs to concentrate on the task at hand. Not only I am a Navy wife but one of my brothers is in the Army and he has done 2 tours in Iraq. Believe me I was worried sick about him, but never let him know that. I was just supportive, sent lots of care pkgs and emails, made sure his wife and their kids were doing good and if I felt bad about him being over there I talked to my DH and friends to work out those feelings. Like I said in my first post, this is what the military life is about. We may not like it but we have to deal with it, and making yourself sick over things you can't change isn't good for anyone. Big hugs to you and your family Keep talking about your feelings it really helps, it's good that you have found some support groups to help you do that.

 

[lookingforward]

I hope your brother gets to come home and that his deployment goes as smoothly as possible. My husband served 26 years in the USMC and it is not easy. See if your mom can meet some other USMC moms locally and keep up with his unit's call tree/network. I used to take great joy in sending my husband great care packages. From what I heard from our friends who are still "in" it is very expensive to send to Iraq...but letters and postcards will help too!

As for the airlines, try and ask for a fare accomadation...they will sometimes wave fees, etc. for military who are about to be deployed. Its worth a try.

My thoughts and best wishes are with your family. Welcome to the USMC! Semper Fi!

 

[dbarker]

Mickeyistheman:

There is a wonderful support group for Marine families online. It is MarineParents.com

It helped me through boot camp and 2 deployments.

Good luck and Semper Fi.

 

[Mickrzy]

Hi, everything will work out, it is just hard the first time you have to send DS into battle, but it will get easier and writing, emails and care packages help and phone calls when they can. My DH and DSil are there now and my DS will join them in Nov, so I will have all my guys there. If your mom needs someone to email and discuss things she can contact me, this is my guys 4th deployment and it gets alittle easier each time but still hard to say goodbye. So chin up and be proud and supportive! Good Luck and Safe Travels to your brother. And God Bless all of our Troops!!
Kathy
Mickrzy@msn.com

 

[Mickeyistheman]

Just wanted to update everyone. He was able to come home for just a few days before his deployment and we suprised my parents!!

It was so great to see my mothers face! I can NEVER surprise her with anything and it was the lift that she needed.

We have started to put together his first care package. I also have joined a gym and since he left I have gone everyday and I told my brother that if I am feeling down I will just go to the gym so the next time he sees me, I'll be skinny Minnie! He laughs at that.

We have spoken to him even if just for a few minutes. We have put yellow ribbons all over our block and the neighbors have been so wonderful.

My mother had a call back interview so that is helping and she goes to church every morning. We are just keeping busy, yesterday was very difficult. Especially because we lost several friends on 9/11. Today is another day and things will get better.

I really want to thank everyone for their kind words and great advice. I truly appreciate it!

Semper Fi!

 

[Piglet4Ever]

Just wanted to update everyone. He was able to come home for just a few days before his deployment and we suprised my parents!!

It was so great to see my mothers face! I can NEVER surprise her with anything and it was the lift that she needed.

We have started to put together his first care package. I also have joined a gym and since he left I have gone everyday and I told my brother that if I am feeling down I will just go to the gym so the next time he sees me, I'll be skinny Minnie! He laughs at that.

We have spoken to him even if just for a few minutes. We have put yellow ribbons all over our block and the neighbors have been so wonderful.

My mother had a call back interview so that is helping and she goes to church every morning. We are just keeping busy, yesterday was very difficult. Especially because we lost several friends on 9/11. Today is another day and things will get better.

I really want to thank everyone for their kind words and great advice. I truly appreciate it!

Semper Fi!

Glad everything worked out with your brother's visit and happy to hear that you and your family are doing good. The deployment will be over before you know it!