Need help! Friend trying to hijack our vacation.

[cruising spud]

A few questions:

First, does the son even know what his mom is trying to do with the room arrangements? Maybe he won't agree with this plan.

And would you clarify-how many nights are the three of you staying and how many nights would the son be staying?

 

[SwirlTheCitrus]

Ok, so I'm with everyone else that I would be totally uncomfortable with this. From a logicistical standpoint, if you can keep this conversation going for a few more days, you will be within the 30 day cancellation period. Since you booked a package, if you cancel, even to shift the reservation, you would have to pay a $200 fee to cancel. In order to book the split stay you would have to cancel what you have because wilderness lodge will be fully booked already I'm sure. You would then have to quickly rebook the room in two chunks. However, there is a not unlikely chance that you will lose the room in the process. While you're grabbing one half someone who is checking regularly for a room could grab the other half. Or, a fun thing that Disney's reservation system has been doing lately is not wanting to book just a couple nights. If you search for 2 nights you may get no availability but if you search for 5 a room all of a sudden pops up. They do this to encourage longer stays. So there is a very real possibility if you release the room you may not be able to rebook it as a split stay.

How do you and your mom feel about splitting the cost in half? I would recommend to her that her and her son can go get their own room somewhere. It is absolutely unreasonable for him to stay with you and not pay his fair share. Not to mention the discomfort and the special accommodations she wants.

At this point, I would love it to just be my mom and me.. we haven't told her, but this is the last of our "girls" trips together. My mom and I went halvsies on two dvc contracts for the future. It just always adds so much stress to something that everyone has high expectations for, and it ends up in a meltdown each time. Unfortunately, usually for me.

 

[SwirlTheCitrus]

A few questions:

First, does the son even know what his mom is trying to do with the room arrangements? Maybe he won't agree with this plan.

And would you clarify-how many nights are the three of you staying and how many nights would the son be staying?

6 for us, 2 for him with us.

 

[Farro]

6 for us, 2 for him with us.

Did you try finding a room yet?

 

[SwirlTheCitrus]

Did you try finding a room yet?

She's realized that we cannot alter our plans-- he or both of them (with her still paying for the dining plan package) would need to stay elsewhere for the two nights. Making progress!

 

[StitchesGr8Fan]

Are you past the PIF date? That could be your out. “Sorry, we can’t make changes without a fee.” And adding an adult to the room would increase the room price because of the premium they tack on for the 3rd and 4th adult. So the friend should hypothetically have to pay even more.

 

[Disneypro1]

She can go on her own. Wouldn’t be with us. Would not deal with that at all.

 

[Heather07438]

At this point, I would love it to just be my mom and me.. we haven't told her, but this is the last of our "girls" trips together. My mom and I went halvsies on two dvc contracts for the future. It just always adds so much stress to something that everyone has high expectations for, and it ends up in a meltdown each time. Unfortunately, usually for me.

That's good then, you and your mom are fine with absorbing her share of the room cost. Then just say it's uncomfortable to have that many people in a room especially with the added demands on the bathroom and privacy with a male.
Let her know you understand if she prefers sharing a room with her son instead of your plans. Jedi mind trick, lol.

 

[RamblingMad]

At this point, I would love it to just be my mom and me.. we haven't told her, but this is the last of our "girls" trips together. My mom and I went halvsies on two dvc contracts for the future. It just always adds so much stress to something that everyone has high expectations for, and it ends up in a meltdown each time. Unfortunately, usually for me.

Maybe help her find her son an offsite hotel room and have him invite a friend to hang out with. Then maybe they meet you guys for an occasional meal.

I’ve seen so many meltdowns in Disney parks that I cringe whenever I see their ads on TV.

Hang in there.

 

[SG131]

At this point, I would love it to just be my mom and me.. we haven't told her, but this is the last of our "girls" trips together. My mom and I went halvsies on two dvc contracts for the future. It just always adds so much stress to something that everyone has high expectations for, and it ends up in a meltdown each time. Unfortunately, usually for me.

Good for you! My mom and I just did the same (well it was originally one contract but in the process of closing our second).

 

[mom2rtk]

She's realized that we cannot alter our plans-- he or both of them (with her still paying for the dining plan package) would need to stay elsewhere for the two nights. Making progress!

Honestly, she shouldn't back off on this because she CAN'T do it. She should back off because she SHOULDN'T do it.

Don't feel bad. Don't feel conflicted. It's an unreasonable request.

 

[Silvermist999]

Sounds like she is a really good friend of you and your mom. If she is such a good friend, she will not mind your honesty when you tell her you and your mom (your mom needs to chime in too or it will look bad) are not comfortable with the adult son in the same room, plus room is too small, blah blah for 4 adults. Just suggest he find a room and he is welcome to meet up at the parks or dining etc, and if she wants, she can stay with him there etc.

 

[SwirlTheCitrus]

Alright, it's off. All is good. Thank you all for your help, suggestions, and for letting me vent! I truly appreciate it!

 

[kylenne]

I really don’t mean to sound patronizing or condescending with this but I’m really proud of you for sticking to your guns. It’s hard sometimes to set boundaries with people we love, it was a tough lesson I had to learn myself and still struggle with at times. But it’s the best for everyone. You and your mom deserve to have a nice, stress free and fun trip.

 

[SG131]

Glad it worked out! Hope you have a great time!

 

[tigertoo]

Hey all-- I need your assistance! My mother, myself, and our friend in common have booked a Christmas trip to Wilderness Lodge at the end of December through the beginning of January. Well, now this friend's adult son won free tickets. Not only is our friend trying to invite her son on our vacation and stay in our room, but she wants to change the reservation so that he only needs to stay for 3 days so that he doesn't need to pay the full dining plan package at the rest of us are paying for.

I'm extremely frustrated because I don't know her son very well, and because this is extremely short notice for plans I have had completed for 2/3 of a year. Is it possible even to do a "split stay" where we have four people in the room for two nights out of the six? I'm very concerned that this is going to completely wreck our reservation of which there are none left at this point.

I'm truly hoping you all say no, because I'm looking for any excuse to nip this in the bud. She does not have common sense when it regards her children, and doesn't even appreciate that this is completely inappropriate to ask.

And anyone have any advice for me, for how to deal with this? ❤ I'm one of those people that has every moment planned because I don't want to miss one moment of anything related to holidays at Disney World, and it is NOT OKAY. JUST NOT OKAY.

... At the same point, however, I do not want to lose her friendship.

... But what about the dining reservations?!

Maybe you could just tell her that you were looking forward to this being a "girls" trip Hopefully, she'd get the hint.

 

[Amylc]

Hey all-- I need your assistance! My mother, myself, and our friend in common have booked a Christmas trip to Wilderness Lodge at the end of December through the beginning of January. Well, now this friend's adult son won free tickets. Not only is our friend trying to invite her son on our vacation and stay in our room, but she wants to change the reservation so that he only needs to stay for 3 days so that he doesn't need to pay the full dining plan package at the rest of us are paying for.

I'm extremely frustrated because I don't know her son very well, and because this is extremely short notice for plans I have had completed for 2/3 of a year. Is it possible even to do a "split stay" where we have four people in the room for two nights out of the six? I'm very concerned that this is going to completely wreck our reservation of which there are none left at this point.

I'm truly hoping you all say no, because I'm looking for any excuse to nip this in the bud. She does not have common sense when it regards her children, and doesn't even appreciate that this is completely inappropriate to ask.

And anyone have any advice for me, for how to deal with this? ❤ I'm one of those people that has every moment planned because I don't want to miss one moment of anything related to holidays at Disney World, and it is NOT OKAY. JUST NOT OKAY.

... At the same point, however, I do not want to lose her friendship.

... But what about the dining reservations?!

No way would I allow it! Get his own room if he can’t too bad

 

[Lynne M]

I shuddered when I read your post - I've been there. And I'm very glad that it worked out the way you wanted it to.

 

[hereforthechurros]

I shuddered when I read your post - I've been there. And I'm very glad that it worked out the way you wanted it to.

Seriously, that was a roller coaster

 

[Nancyg56]

I’m glad that nonsense is over. What a selfish thing to ask of friends.