Need advice on paying off large debt

[LovetheMouse12302]

I need advice on eliminating large debt. It is just taking over our lives. I've told dh that his student loan debt is going to eat us alive for a year now, actually while he was in school I tried to get him to transfer to a less expensive school because I knew what graduates were making and our income wasn't going to float it. I have worked about as much as I can getting our debt down. Working evenings and staying home during the day taking care of ds, coupon clipping, you name it I've done it. He would rather just not talk about it because it upsets him. I'm tired of carrying OUR financial burdens on just my shoulders. It's just not fair. When I offer to go out and work more its okay, but when he goes and gruffs about finding more work he says he doesn't want to do it and then cries. I am beyond frustrated. His student loans total roughly $130,000 and is close to $1,000 a month. What can we do to get this huge number down? There just isn't any help out there. My brain is too tired to think of anymore ideas. Thanks for any and all ideas.

 

[HeatherFeather]

I don't know if this is even a consideration, but both the Army and Navy will re-pay up to $65,000 in student loans if you enlist in certain specialties. It is also a steady paycheck with access to any healthcare your family might need. It would still leave you with some to pay off, but that would be a HUGE chunk out of it.

I don't know what else to tell you except the usual sell your stuff, cancel cable, and work more.

I really feel for you. Hope you get some good advice on here.

 

[minnie1928]

To me it sounds like you are carrying all the burden, or he's in denial, or both. I'm assuming that you've looked into consolidating them in an attempt to lower the overall interest rate? To me it sounds like you need someone to review your entire budget, while a $1000/month student loan is nothing to sneeze at...it's not your entire financial picture.

I frequent a site called www.savingadvice.com along with some other Dis board members. The site is frequented by a lot of regulars that give solid advice for things like this. They're not judgemental...just honest in what they think you need to do. I'd recommend posting your entire budget over there for ideas.

 

[NotUrsula]

Until you do find a really solid solution, take this small step that will begin the chipping-away process: split the monthly note and pay it twice per month, for the due date and also two weeks prior.

Paying half of the amount 15 days in advance will begin to take down the interest, because you will be lessening the balance that it is being calculated on each month. It isn't a big chip, but every bit counts, and this is a painless way to make SOME progress.

I also like to throw just a few dollars extra at such a note -- even rounding up to the nearest $10 helps. I used to call it the "Happy Meal" test -- if I could afford to buy a Happy Meal then I could afford to sock that much extra money toward a debt. That extra bit goes straight to principal.

 

[bsusanmb]

Do you have credit card debt? If you do have debt other than student loans, and it involves CC's or medical bills, Consumer Credit Counseling is a wonderful non profit organization. Suze Ormon recommends it. They are also called Apprisen nationwide. For anyone looking with high interest cc debt, their website if www.apprisen.com

I can't imagine having that kind of student loan debt. I hope you work out some solution.

 

[crisi]

I also like to throw just a few dollars extra at such a note -- even rounding up to the nearest $10 helps. I used to call it the "Happy Meal" test -- if I could afford to buy a Happy Meal then I could afford to sock that much extra money toward a debt. That extra bit goes straight to principal.

We did the same thing - if we could afford to do X we could afford to put money toward the house. Even just small amounts helped out. Did that with my car loan when I was so completely broke that my heat in my house was set to 58 degrees.

And now I'm doing the same thing for church - church has seen its contributions go down during the recession and has had to make a lot of cuts - so I saw a cute purse, had it in my hands to buy it - put in back and sent church the money instead.

 

[nowellsl]

Boy, that's a lot of debt. What kind of degree did he get? Sorry to ask, just curious! There are certain professions that offer student loan forgiveness if you work in certain high need areas (teachers are one group I know of). I'm sure it seems impossible to pay off that kind of debt and I think I'd feel the same way you do! Good luck to you!

 

[a1tinkfans]

You are not alone in that debt, niece currently has $65K outstanding and is STILL in school with another year to go....HOW she will pay it back ?????......................seems daunting to me........especially since I think she is seriously thinking of getting engaged now...with a wedding in a year....then wahLa...baby comes along and .....there goes that "dream" she had.....I am not knocking ANY decision she makes, it is her life....we all must do what we have too, but also make INFORMED decisions!

Most people that rack up that kind of educational debt are HIGHLY motivated, proactive people that secure/d HIGH paying jobs.......otherwise, sadly can end up in a financial BIND
..................
So, to you, as it sounds like YOU are carrying the burden for this debt...I understand SHARING it, but carrying it seems unfair....

I really hope you can find a solution and want to wish you the very best of luck!!! Sorry no easy solution that I know of...........just keep paying!!!

 

[dvcgirl]

Sounds to me like your DH has "Ostrich Syndrome". He needs to pull his head out of sand, sit down with you and the two of you need to come up with a plan to eliminate that debt.

There's no way out of student loan debt....can't bankrupt out of it. And if it's private student loan debt it's nearly impossible to consolidate it these days.

Sounds to me like your DH needs to suck it up, get a second job or figure out how to drastically increase his income. With 135K in student loan debt hopefully he's making a nice income. Otherwise, it's going to be a long haul...

With the size of that debt it's not like cutting out cable and dropping the cell phone are going to help. Unless you can do that for the next 15 years. What it comes down to is you need more money coming in. Unfortunately, with certain types of debt there are no easy answers.

Best of luck.

 

[KyMinnie]

If he is still in school some student loans won't require you to make payments as long as the student is enrolled full time and then gives you another 6 months after they are out of school before payments start. Not making payments won't help long term since you have to one day pay the money back but it might reduce some of the stress your having currently until he gets out of school and then hopefully gets a better paying job right about the time the payments start up. If your loan won't defer it might be worth just calling them and explaining your situation...they may be able to reduce the payments until he is done with school.

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

I am confused. Does he have a job?

 

[LovetheMouse12302]

Thanks for all of the responses He went to a private college and earned a degree in civil engineering and is employed full time. Most of the debt is private loans, so no consolidation out there. He has agreed to sit down with me and go over our budget. Most of our debt is the student loans. In 3 months we will be credit card debt free & dh's car will be paid off. We owe more for my SUV than its worth but I did through out the idea of trying to sell it and pay cash for something cheap. We have a small mortgage and our house payment is very low. I have figured up our budget hundreds of times and wonder where in the world our money is going. I know its mostly the student loans, but I'm not sure what else there is to cut. Ugh! I agree with what most are saying.....more income is going to have to come in somewhere. Also, my dh refuses to switch jobs. I asked if he could search for an engineering firm that is hiring and he said no. Does anyone else have a financially stubborn dh?

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

So it isn't just you working to pay it off. He is working full time and has the baby while you are working, and vice versa, right?

I think sitting down with him and looking at the situation is good. But I wouldn't go into it sounding like you are the only one working at this.

Maybe you could postpone the vacation for a year or two, too. That might allow you to pay off the expensive vehicle?

 

[ceecee]

That's a lot of money for a 4 year degree, I'm assuming he didn't work at all during school, so now may be the time to get a PT job in addition to his FT just to pay back the loans. I thought maybe he was in med school or something.

 

[LovetheMouse12302]

That is correct, and when I work during the day my MIL or mom keeps ds so we wont have to pay for childcare. Looks like no vacations for awhile. When I figure out our budget we come up with a positive balance but it is very very low. Not enough to have much, if any, emergency savings.

 

[LovetheMouse12302]

He worked on campus in the mailroom PT and in the summer did internships. I think he mainly went to his college of choice for the name, he said it looks good in engineering circles. I don't think it even phased his employer.

 

[RyJMom]

My Hubby is an engineer also. Has your Hubby thought about doing some part time consulting work? Might be a way to make some extra money. If you think there might be higher paying jobs out there even if they are in a different area I'd really encourage you to discuss it with him. Even if you had to move it might be worth it. Another thought might be you working full time for a while. A few years of you working full time to get the debt paid off - then you could "retire" and make him support you for the next 50 yrs. ha ha
Keep your chin up. My Hubby and most of his engineer friends are the tightest most anti-debt folks you'd ever want to meet. His co-workers will rub off on him.

 

[janey99]

If he has a degree in civil engineering, does he have any skills in freehand drafting or CAD? I know lots of engineers who do side jobs in the evening, either charging by the hour or by the job, to bring in extra money.

Contractors, landscape designers, engineering firms with overflow all can use per diem drafters.

Something to think about?

Jane

 

[mcco5543]

-You can definitely call the loan company and defer your loans so you can get at least some kind of break from paying them off while you get your bearings. Yes you have to pay them off eventually but you need time to get a better plan and a defferment will take off some pressure.

-If you don't want to deffer you can definitely call the loan company and reduce the monthly payments. Loan companies don't really care what you pay as long as you chip away at it. Yes it takes longer but you HAVE TO have some emergency savings. That's not really an optional thing.

-While i'm sure you already do this/know this. Any extra money goes to those loans. Also if you have the option I would "advance my loans by the advanced payment' In other words if you're loans are lets say 100 bucks and you pay 1000 you'd have "pre paid" 9 months and wont' have to pay again until that time. I am not suggesting you just not pay those months that you technically dont' have to, however if lets say there's a month where you're car goes on the blitz and you need money to fix it. You technically can give up your loan payment for that month and put it towards the car. I have found this very helpful strictly for the anxiety reduction of knowing that if i can't pay my loans one month i'm ahead and i can pay for whatever other emergency has cropped up.

- Again you've probably had all of these next ones suggested to you or already done it but how about a garage sale (just you, your neighborhood, or your community).

-Do you have any old non sentimental jewelry you could give up.

-Could you live on one car between you.
- one television
-one computer
(this is if you have multiples)

-can you swap child care favors with someone so you and your husband can work more?

-can you pick up odd jobs like yard work and snow removal for your neighbors for a small fee?

-can you split a wholesale club membership among you and your friends and buy things in bulk at wholesale prices?

Good luck and hang in there. I know it's an awful feeling to be buried in debt!

 

[bakalorber]

How bout a home equity line of credit to combine some of the non-student loan debt. I know there is issues b/c this now becomes a longer term for you to pay it off but at least it is tax deductable.