Need advice from mommies with Kindergarten kids!!!

[jlatina32]

My DS5 is in kindergarten and every morning just when we are heading out the door to school. His attitude changes. He becomes a complete grouch and refuses to go into his classroom without me. Yesterday, I went in with him and he did not want me to go!! He had such a grip on my hand.......after twenty minutes, I pryed myself out of his hand and had to leave him crying. He has a great Kindergarten teacher. My DD8, had her when she was in kindergarten. This morning I tried a different approach, I had my DD go in with him and for a minute it seemed to have worked but as soon as DD tried to make her way out to go to her class, he clung on to her too. I know alot of kids go through seperation anxiety at this age and I also know that in time (hopefully) he will get over it. I feel terrible knowing he feels terrible. :sad1

Our WDW trip is in 19 days and I'm afraid when we come back, I am going to end up at square one with DS. What is your advice to me?

 

[TinkNH]

My DD4 just started pre-k..and I was a prek teacher (4 and 5 yr olds) for 2 years. All I can tell you is it will get better! The best thing to do is to get him there, and leave as quickly as you can. As a teacher I had to peel some children off their moms at times, and they would cry...untill they got distracted by a toy or friends. (except the one whos mom would sit in the parking lot where he could see her..he didnt stop crying ) Leaving them in tears is hard..I know I just left my little one crying in her teachers arms...but in the long run it is the fastest way to get them to adjust. And if you have to start over after your trip (as we will since we leave next fri...) it will be over faster the second time around.

 

[jlatina32]

Thank you so much for your advice Tink NH. You know as I do that it's just hard. I know he will be fine. I guess it just makes me feel a little better to know that alot of other mommies have the same struggle and understand where I am coming from.

 

[sphmaz]

My neighbor just went through this with their 1st grader. I was there to witness it firsthand on the first day of school. VERY heartwrenching. But they put him on the bus crying his eyes out and walked away, Mom cried out of site of the bus. They had to do this for about 3 days and now he gets on the bus with out even thinking about it. I know it's tough but sometimes it's best for both parent and child to do it this way. My DD (3) still does this to ME only if I have to drop her at daycare in the morning. It's so hard for me to walk away and leave my baby crying. My son (6) never did this to me. Good luck!

 

[Mrs.viv07]

ugh i am so sorry you are going throught this, i know it was very hard for me to see him go but i held it together till he was out of sight. in a way i wanted him to be clingy but i am glad he adjusted well.
also he has been going to pr-school for about a year already since i work full time so he got used to it, he is also an only child so he gets excited when he sees other kids and want to un and play

to the point, has your DS ever gone to pre-school? he has his big sis to play with at home so he may be more shy than having separation issues. One thingi have learned at time the hard way is that you can't push him to do something my son anyway has to be slowly coaxed into things, like when we go to a playground he seeks approval before going of to play, perhaps your son need some more encouragement, talk to him at night and let him know you will be there at the end of the day, kids worry that maybe mommy won't come back if he lets her go. crazy but you need to think in terms of a 5 year old and not as an adult.

i hope it gets better

 

[jlatina32]

I know it will get better in time. He is fine when he gets up in the morning. He brushes his teeth and I help him put on his clothes. He has breakfast with his sister. But the minute we head out the door, and we arrive to his class, his demeanor changes. He did go to Pre-kindergarten and he was the same way but a little worse. I guess time will tell. I just hate leaving him feeling terrible and crying. But you guys, are right....I gotta do what a mommy's got to do.

 

[TinkNH]

Thank you so much for your advice Tink NH. You know as I do that it's just hard. I know he will be fine. I guess it just makes me feel a little better to know that alot of other mommies have the same struggle and understand where I am coming from.

oh a struggle yep....I have cried all the way home both days, was esp hard leaving her today cause teacher was holding her in the window to wave goodbye and she was crying. Having been on the other side and having to shoo moms out the door (the longer they stay the harder for the kids) I know I am doing the best thing...but as a mom it does not make it any easier! Glad too that I can come here and talk to other mommies

 

[Al and Kate's Mom]

I think my DD5 is strange after reading this - she insisted that she get to ride the school bus her first day a few weeks ago and I thought I was going to have a breakdown right there - she jumped on the bus and blew me a kiss - no tears from her but plenty from me

 

[MammaNicholas]

I don't have this problem, my dd is 5 going on 15. But, he other day at open house, her teacher advised that those who were having seperation issues to let them ride the school bus. You seperate quicker when the bus arrives, and it give them that feeling of being a big kid. My dd rides the bus, and loves it, but I live in a small town were everybody knows everybody so I can do this with out worring too much. Maybe if you have a bus option, you may want to give it a shot.