Need a little magic

[WanderLit]

(Brace yourself, I'm getting all sappy in this post.)

I'm about to take my daughter and granddaughter on a Disney Cruise. We're doing the Western Caribbean on the Fantasy leaving on my granddaughter's 5th birthday June 11th. I booked a year ago and, at the time, had no idea what we would all be going through during the wait for our cruise. It's been heartbreaking and we all need a little Disney magic.

My daughter is in the middle of a divorce and broke her leg two weeks ago. My granddaughter's other grandma lost her fight with breast cancer and my own parents were just in an accident three months ago while vacationing out-of-state. My mother was killed and my father seriously injured. My sister and I flew down to him and spent a month making my mother's final arrangements and caring for Dad until he was well enough to travel the slow, sad trip home with Mom's remains.

I'm not mentioning all of this for sympathy. I'm mentioning it because at 47 years old, I feel sad and jaded. I long for the simplicity and safety of my own happy childhood... back when I still believed in fairies. I want my daughter to feel that her world is still full of wondrous possibilities as my granddaughter discovers the joy of Disney dreams coming true.

I'm not an experienced Disney adventurer but I'm more than willing to throw myself into the Disney experience and am open to the magic of being a child again. This is where you all come in. Can you help?

What Disney Cruise experiences do you recommend for a couple of sad wounded adults who want to return to a state of child-like innocence and wonder again? (even for just a week.)

 

[mjfisherdc]

Sound like the 3 of you really need this time away together. The thing I loved about our cruise last month was getting away from reality. No internet (unlessa you pay for it). Minimal cell service. We did not watch any news either. It was our happy bubble or 7 days.

 

[squirk]

Several times on the podcast, Kathy has shared the story of how she lost her husband and afterward took her kids to Disney World to let them temporarily set aside their feelings of sadness and loss, and just be "kids on vacation" like any other.

As @mjfisherdc pointed out, I think the cruises, regardless of what you do on them, just let you get away from all of the sad feelings. People, places, events, phone calls, texts, e-mails - any of those things that bring your losses to the forefront of your mind can be temporarily set aside (not forgotten) so you can just be grandma, daughter and granddaughter on a "girls cruise" like any other.

If your sister can be there for your dad while you're gone, then just turn off the cell phone and put it in the safe. Do not get a wi-fi package or jump on free wi-fi when you are in port. Do not watch news on TVs around the ship.

Take your granddaughter to tea with the princesses. And meet-and-greets. Get her a package at BBB. Do the family games at the D Lounge. Play in the kids clubs with your granddaughter during the open houses. Do all the Midship Detective Agency missions. Maybe set your dining rotation to get three dinners at Animator's (the most fun of the three MDRs). For me, nothing chases my blues away like watching my kids enjoy themselves.

Make the ship your bubble. Everything, bad and good, will be waiting for you when you get back.

 

[bksaffle]

So sorry for everything that has been going on. I know a lot of things are easier said than done, but PLEASE allow yourself to smile, laugh, and just experience the whole trip....make happy memories between the three of you. I think the atmosphere of the cruise will bring back some child-like innocence....give yourself permission to enjoy it. The Disney "magic/pixie dust" will definitely be there.

Stay busy, go to activities, shows, dinners, character meet-n-greets, or even just lay out on the deck enjoying the sun...the peacefulness of the ocean is amazing.

On a side note....when we lost my Mother-in-Law unexpectedly a year or so ago, we made sure that our kids knew that it was not dishonoring her when they laughed or enjoyed something going on, but instead they were honoring her memory, because she loved it when they laughed and had a good time. This helped them with their grief....I think it almost made them want to enjoy life more, and more appreciated all the memories we have created since.

 

[Tonka's Skipper]

Let the magic and pixie dust surround the 3 of you...it will start with the DCL unique terminal, you will discover as you finish check in and head for the gangway entrance, the little touches of Disney will surround you. The classic design and theming of the vessel overall and the lobby will that your breath away as you walk in and hear the CM announce your family name. Have lunch and get settled in your cabin then explore to discover the things that the ship, CM's and characters offer. It will begin to you 3 closer together, it can only be described as pixie dust and magic.

Check out your navigator daily events, so many things to do. The more you can do together the better. The memories will be timeless.

Remember what Walt always said and tried to teach us all..............Theres alot of child in all kids, and there still a little child in all adults. Don't be afraid to let the child within you out.

Have a great cruise.

God's blessing and prayers to you and your family.

AKK

 

[WanderLit]

Thank you, everyone. This is some excellent advice. I'm looking forward to finding out what the "D lounge"is and I just got off the phone with Disney guest services where I requested the dining rotation that gives us an extra night in Animators. Spending time together and just giving ourselves over to the playful opportunities sounds like the very best medicine.

Thank you for asking, yes, my sister will be taking care of Dad while we're gone. My sister has been to Disney World several times and she is thrilled I'm finally going on a Disney trip of my own. I think I might fudge on the advice to disconnect from news and technology just enough to send her and Dad pics and text messages so they can share some of the experience with us. Bksaffle is right. Not only would those we've lost be happy to see us play, so would those holding down the fort. It will be our mission to gather in all the pixie dust we can and then share it.

by the way... squirk, would you happen to have a reference for one of the podcasts Kathy talked about that trip to Disney after she lost her husband? I think I'd like to listen to that.

mom
me
darling daughter
darling granddaughter

 

[Flossbolna]

You already got some great advise. I hope you have a fabulous trip that lets all three of you experience some of that true Disney Magic!

Two ideas that came to mind are:

First, talk to the CMs on the ship. Some of my most magical moments were those conversations I had with various CMs, the bartender, the shop assistants, the lady in the gallery, the lady cleaning the bathrooms on the pool deck, the officers in the atrium before dinner. It helps if you manage to get away from the crowds a little. At peak lunch time at the burger window, you won't get into any conversations. But on a morning during a sea day, I witnessed a big sword fight going on between two boy and the shop CM! In my experiences during the time before the first dinner seating and between the two dinner seatings when there are picture opportunities and character meets, often some princesses just mingle with the guests as well. I have seen little girls playing for 10 minutes with Cinderella. I don't think you can hunt down these moments, but if you try to not rush around from one big event to the next and instead take time to just slow down, I am sure you will find your personal moments!

Also - I can understand that you want to let your sister and your dad take part in your adventures. I would recommend to create a specific email account just for this purpose and only get those emails while you are on the ship. I started this to limit my data usage and I really love having that special family account that only very few select people can contact me on. This way, I can stay in touch with my loved ones, but block out the rest of the world.

 

[darnheather]

Big hugs. I won't go into details but we went through a heck of a lot in the two years before our cruise. It was something that I had really given up hope on ever doing. However, from the moment I stepped onboard I felt like I was treated like an absolute princess. I allowed my girls to really relax and have far fewer rules than at home. We drank Shirley Temples every night and fished the cherries out with our spoon to eat them. We dressed casually most of the time and had fun dressing up sometimes. We laid by the pool, took naps, ate whatever we wanted. Two of our four ports we didn't get off the ship and instead just relaxed. I have never been so happy for 7 straight days in my life. On the last night I hugged my stateroom attendant and started crying thanking her for making me feel like someone truly special. She was just amazing. My oldest daughter cried at breakfast the last morning when saying goodbye to our servers.

Give yourself and your daughter time to be alone. My one rule was that my younger daughter had to go to the club after breakfast and until lunch. This gave me time to do just whatever I wanted for a few hours. I swam in the adult pool, worked out in the gym, had a leisurely second cup of coffee, whatever!

I hope you have a relaxing, healing vacation.

 

[squirk]

by the way... squirk, would you happen to have a reference for one of the podcasts Kathy talked about that trip to Disney after she lost her husband? I think I'd like to listen to that.

I think if you go back and look for any podcast titled "Meet the Team", or "What Got You Hooked on Disney?" (or something similar), you will likely hear Kathy tell her story. Seems like they do those eps once or twice a year at least.

 

[WanderLit]

I think if you go back and look for any podcast titled "Meet the Team", or "What Got You Hooked on Disney?" (or something similar), you will likely hear Kathy tell her story. Seems like they do those eps once or twice a year at least.

Thanks I'll do that!

 

[kimkreis]

To make a little fun time with just you and your daughter, sign up for one (or all!!!) of the alcohol tastings. Mixology is a ton of fun. You and 20 ish people get to sample 5 cocktails and how to make them, you even get to make some yourself. There is also wine tastings, champagne tastings, beer tastings, Cognac tastings, and on the Fantasy they did an Italian cocktail tasting. It was fun to do with my hubby and because he isn't as social as me, it was fun to meet people you could chat with the rest of the cruise.

 

[belac]

Just wanted to say we are wishing all of you all the pixie dust in NEVERLAND.
Some thing to add to the great list from all the PP is to start off the trip magically. For your DGD you may ask cast members to announce her as Princess (insert name) and DD as queen (name) and Queen Mother (you). Then get tix to princess and frozen meets first thing after you board.
Some more little thing that DH did for me after I lost my DGM and we suffered a miscarriage was ask the Dining servers to do little special things for my son, so we could focus on his magic. Yes they did tricks, but they brought him chocolates, did some cute animal napkins, and DH brought a Mickey (at some point gave to server) and server brought it over and announced they had a special delivery for him from Mickey.
We had brought small items from Disney store at home to gift him, and DH practiced Mickey handwriting for some time and wrote notes from Mickey to DS. Stateroom host put them out every night with a note, DH hid them on top in closet and told host where to get them.
He also got me a massage but I canceled it, wanted to hang with them as much as possible.
I wish you the happiest magical cruise ever. Don't forget to relax, and yeah I would check in once or twice with sis when you have free cell service. It would be so hard for me not to, but that is all up to you and how you feel. I think your dad would also love seeing photos of DGD as well.