My daughter is complaining a Lot lately

[JanetRose]

She is 19 years old and attends college away -

She seems to be complaining a lot lately about school, room mates, etc, etc.

I told her all she has to do is think about how things can be worst, not better, and she's be the happiest person in the world.

I pay her car insurance and cell phone; her dad pays her car payment and room/board. She works part time but not during the summer - doesn't have to.

Are most kids like this?

 

[Daisy Duck 5]

I'm 21 and everytime I go into a fast food place or clothing store I remember why I am in university. Has she always been given what she wants and not had to pay for anything? No offence but she sounds spoiled. Maybe you and her dad are giving her too much and she does not see the point of going to university. I am in my second year of university but I am in one first year class. I see a big difference between first and second year students. Either people's attitudes about university change between first and second year or the people with the bad attitudes drop out. I would give it until the beginning of next year and see how things are going then. She may not be used to the way things run there and just needs some time to get used to it.

Our first year prof was asking us why we come to class. Some people raised their hands and said they were paying to be there and that they didn't want to waist their money. I would say most of the people skipping class are getting their university paided for. Make your daughter work this summer and have her pay a certain % of her university fees. Also make sure she is where she wants to be. If she is not happy with the program she is in let her switch. I needed a year off between high school and university jsut to get out and work and have a break from school.

 

[MrsPete]

Are most kids like this?

No. I assume she's a freshman or sophomore. Perhaps she's uncertain about her major, her choice of college, etc. Perhaps graduation just looks forever away. Does she have college loans? Perhaps she's already worried about starting out her professional life with debt. Perhaps she needs a different living situation.

You need to find out what's behind all this complaining.

 

[monarchsfan16]

I'm a freshman this year. Roommates are definitely something that can be complained about. Those ones may be very valid. Lord knows some of us will be in therapy for years thanks to our first roommates . What other kinds of complaints does she have? Maybe she's truly not happy at the school. Despite being "handed" stuff, it's certainly possible to be unhappy. My best friend definitely knows all that's being done for her, but she can't wait to get the heck out of the school she's at now. Her complaints are really justified; the situation is bad. It happens, no matter how lucky or unlucky you are. One of my former roommates (I started with three in a temporary lounge and finally am in a regular room with just one), has to work for everything, and has even more complaints than my best friend, and her's are unjustified.
I guess what I'm saying is, the complaints don't always have to do with being spoiled or being given too much; some are really justified.

 

[Blueeyes101817]

i agree with heather--when i went away to my first college, i hated it and couldnt wait to come home...i KNEW what my parents were paying for it, i just couldnt stand it..i transferred after t he first semester and i am now much happier

 

[jamzots]

Maybe she is just really miserable at college and wants to come home but doesn't want to dissapoint you? It sounds like maybe there is something deeper going on and she is complaining to see what your reaction will be.
Is she a 1st year student?? Maybe she is homesick. My ds is only 14, but already we know he won't be going away to college because he loves his home, and he wouldn't be ready to leave at 19. Good Luck!!

 

[amburger]

Wow. I'm only 18 and I pay my car payment and have been since I was 17 which isn't always easy seeing as I also only work part-time. And yes, I got my car in my name at 17. lol. But my mom pays my car insurance and cell phone. I still live at home though, but I am in college. My college doesn't have dorms though because it's a community college.
I can't say I'm better than her and I'm not trying to because I know I complain a lot, too. Right now my mom has a roommate for extra income (she's divorced) and I'll admit I do complain about her a lot. It's hard to deal with at times because it's a new person. Someone I'd never met before she moved in and it's not always fun. She has two cats that are super annoying and it's just hard to adjust to someone else's living styles and plus, she has my room now so my room is in the sunroom which really doesn't qualify as a room in my opinion. haha.

Anyways, I think being away and having roommates and being in college is just hard and frustrating. No one, or not most people, want to be back in school again for another four years after finishing high school. That's where I'm at anyways. I just want to be over and done with and out there working and supporting myself and just living my life, but unforunately I can't do that until I get these next three years knocked out of the way. It sucks. I think most kids have a bit of these feelings as well.