Mixed Nuts

[apirateslifeforme]

Please don't listen to him. I know it's hard.

It is hard. He totally hates me. He says he doesn't...he says he feels sorry for me. Yeah, right. If you felt sorry for me, you'd HELP me, not sit there and rip me apart for something I did NOT do EIGHT freaking years ago!

I feel shredded. Literally shredded.

 

[disneymama73]

It is hard. He totally hates me. He says he doesn't...he says he feels sorry for me. Yeah, right. If you felt sorry for me, you'd HELP me, not sit there and rip me apart for something I did NOT do EIGHT freaking years ago!

I feel shredded. Literally shredded.

That is so wrong. You need to keep him out of your life. I'm so sorry.

 

[apirateslifeforme]

That is so wrong. You need to keep him out of your life. I'm so sorry.

Who else do I have? I have my mother - who is so wrapped up with my grandmother that she dumps on me. I have no one here to turn to. No one here to go places with.

I even tried to tell him that he's really hurt my grandmother. Not for the guilt trip, but she said it. She always considered him her grandson, and he called her Gram. Now he won't even go see her. She's dying and he doesn't care. He actually said, "I respect her, but she's not my grandmother."

 

[disneymama73]

Who else do I have? I have my mother - who is so wrapped up with my grandmother that she dumps on me. I have no one here to turn to. No one here to go places with.

I even tried to tell him that he's really hurt my grandmother. Not for the guilt trip, but she said it. She always considered him her grandson, and he called her Gram. Now he won't even go see her. She's dying and he doesn't care. He actually said, "I respect her, but she's not my grandmother."

Oh Liz. You must feel so alone. I'm here whenever you want to talk.

 

[apirateslifeforme]

Oh Liz. You must feel so alone. I'm here whenever you want to talk.

I do. I feel very alone.

I'm numb right now. I'm exhausted. I'm probably going to go to bed soon. I guess my counselor will be saying "I told you so" tomorrow. Even though she never did to begin with...she's always been very supportive of me because everything was going well. She knows about my phobia and she agreed with my solution. Now we have to find a new one and I don't know that there is one.

 

[blue_river]

Just a drive by. Hope to be back later.

 

[disneymama73]

I do. I feel very alone.

I'm numb right now. I'm exhausted. I'm probably going to go to bed soon. I guess my counselor will be saying "I told you so" tomorrow. Even though she never did to begin with...she's always been very supportive of me because everything was going well. She knows about my phobia and she agreed with my solution. Now we have to find a new one and I don't know that there is one.

You're not alone.

You should get some rest. There has to be some sort of solution.

 

[disneymama73]

Just a drive by. Hope to be back later.

Hi and bye!

 

[apirateslifeforme]

You're not alone.

You should get some rest. There has to be some sort of solution.

Could I go back 11 years in time and not meet him?

I am so tempted to put a curse on him. But black magic gets returned to you, and frankly, I don't need any more bad luck.

Did I ever mention that I'd transferred several thousand dollars of his debt to one of my credit cards about 5 years ago? I still owe about $4,000 of it, and now he's refusing to pay me. And there's nothing I can do about it.

 

[disneymama73]

Could I go back 11 years in time and not meet him?

I am so tempted to put a curse on him. But black magic gets returned to you, and frankly, I don't need any more bad luck.

Did I ever mention that I'd transferred several thousand dollars of his debt to one of my credit cards about 5 years ago? I still owe about $4,000 of it, and now he's refusing to pay me. And there's nothing I can do about it.

Ohh, stay away from the black magic!

Yes, you mentioned the credit card. What a jerk.

 

[apirateslifeforme]

Ohh, stay away from the black magic!

Yes, you mentioned the credit card. What a jerk.

Yep. Got him out of debt three times. Then there's the "other thing" I mentioned...the three times he threw his keys at me (keys leave mighty big bruises)...the numerous times he shoved me so hard I ended up on the floor or through a wall (yes, one time I did go through the wall...kinda sucks when you're a renter)...the sprained fingers...the name-calling and unfounded accusations...

I don't care who knows at this point. I have nothing to be ashamed of.

But I'm still the bad guy. It's all my fault.

 

[disneymama73]

Yep. Got him out of debt three times. Then there's the "other thing" I mentioned...the three times he threw his keys at me (keys leave mighty big bruises)...the numerous times he shoved me so hard I ended up on the floor or through a wall (yes, one time I did go through the wall...kinda sucks when you're a renter)...the sprained fingers...the name-calling and unfounded accusations...

I don't care who knows at this point. I have nothing to be ashamed of.

But I'm still the bad guy. It's all my fault.

It's not your fault. HE is the bad guy. It's unbelievable what he put you through.

 

[apirateslifeforme]

It's not your fault. HE is the bad guy. It's unbelievable what he put you through.

Oh, but to quote him..."I didn't do anything wrong." He's perfect. An absolute angel.

You know what? Maybe this is the anger talking and maybe I need to cool off first, but I might just petition to take my mother's last name. I saw no need to change my name, but maybe I should. Be done with him once and for all.

 

[disneymama73]

Oh, but to quote him..."I didn't do anything wrong." He's perfect. An absolute angel.

You know what? Maybe this is the anger talking and maybe I need to cool off first, but I might just petition to take my mother's last name. I saw no need to change my name, but maybe I should. Be done with him once and for all.

He is FAR from perfect. What a laugh! Maybe you should consider taking your mother's last name...

 

[apirateslifeforme]

He is FAR from perfect. What a laugh! Maybe you should consider taking your mother's last name...

I'll think about it. Have to see how much it costs. The time and aggravation of changing everything may not be worth it

 

[disneymama73]

I'll think about it. Have to see how much it costs. The time and aggravation of changing everything may not be worth it

Yeah, that's true. Too bad it's too late now to include it as part of the divorce.

 

[apirateslifeforme]

Yeah, that's true. Too bad it's too late now to include it as part of the divorce.

I wouldn't have been able to. My mother took back her maiden name when I was 18. Her last name isn't MY maiden name. According to the paperwork for this state, I could only take back MY maiden name at the time of divorce. I want nothing to do with that name either. All I could do was get the divorce, then petition the court later if I want to change the name to something different.

Since I can take anything I want, maybe I should go with Bowie. Or LeBon.

 

[disneymama73]

I wouldn't have been able to. My mother took back her maiden name when I was 18. Her last name isn't MY maiden name. According to the paperwork for this state, I could only take back MY maiden name at the time of divorce. I want nothing to do with that name either. All I could do was get the divorce, then petition the court later if I want to change the name to something different.

Since I can take anything I want, maybe I should go with Bowie. Or LeBon.

Oh, I see! Go for it! Bowie or LeBon sound great.

 

[apirateslifeforme]

Oh, I see! Go for it! Bowie or LeBon sound great.

I don't think I like the way Liz Bowie sounds. I'd have to be Elizabeth; that sounds better. Liz LeBon isn't too bad. Plus then, at least I wouldn't have to change my initials.

To anyone who may read this later...I'm totally joking. It's highly unlikely that I would take that last name. It's just a fantasy.

 

[disneymama73]

I don't think I like the way Liz Bowie sounds. I'd have to be Elizabeth; that sounds better. Liz LeBon isn't too bad. Plus then, at least I wouldn't have to change my initials.

To anyone who may read this later...I'm totally joking. It's highly unlikely that I would take that last name. It's just a fantasy.

It would definitely have to be Elizabeth Bowie. You're right though -- Liz LeBon isn't bad.