Mind of a dieter

[Raenstoirm]

I was with my extended family over the weekend and observed a very interesting phenomenon. Most of the women in the family are on a diet (and have been for years, yet never seem to lose!). Most of the men and a few of the women are not and have never been.
There was this bucket of biscotti on the table. Almost every person looked at the nutrition info on the box before taking one. (Each was a little over 100 calories). The non-dieters only had one. The dieters seemed to rationalize that they were "only" 100 calories so they each had a few.

How do you "break" that mind frame and only have 1 without feeling deprived?
I personally didn't have any since I don't like biscotti, but I know I would have felt compelled to go back for seconds just like the dieters if I had.

 

[donac]

I experienced a different situtation at Thanksgiving. I was sitting next to my sister and I usually feel funny at events like this because even though I need to lose some weight I only take one plate of food. I very rarely go back for seconds. My sister was eating like there was no tomorrow. At the beginning it made me want to eat more so I had a plate that was 95% salad. After I had that it was making me sick to see her shoveling food like she was.

I know what you mean about rationalizing that it's only a 100 calories so why not have a couple. I never look at it like that. I look at it as portion control and I have used up 100 calories I shouldn''t take any more. Hey maybe I am starting to think like a thin person.

 

[bubba73]

What I have noticed is that "dieters" will rationalize on 1 item and say that it isn't as bad as the rest so they overdo that one item. Non-dieters will only get one of the same item and not feel deprived because if they still have a sweet tooth, they will go back and get a piece of cheesecake (or whatever's available).

The reason dieters seem to never loose is because they are only dieting by title, not by heart. It takes a lot of heart, determination and will power to say No! to something fried, covered in sugar or is one of your all time favorite dishes. I can eat my weight in chocolate chip cookies. I absolutely love them. But this weekend at the Family Christmas Party, I wouldn't indulge. Actually, all I ate was some turkey, broccoli (with no sauce) and a little bit of fruit. Everyone else in my family was going back for seconds and I was wishing I could be at the gym working out. So it's a mindset that most people are not willing to accept. Not saying that they won't but most make a choice not to go to that level. Now, I am not saying that a cheat meal once in a while is not good for you because it is. It is actually essential but they can't let the cheat meals exceed the healthy meals.

Sorry for being so long-winded.

Bryan

 

[Tiger Lily 03]

I also find that most think in terms of the "D" word. Diet, deprived.
As I understand, if we think in the negative, we will certainly have a much more difficult time turning away.

When I am having my head on straight, I find it easy to think positive and find success. I am able to think of food as fuel and eat to live. I WISH I could figure it out and that everyone would find the key to making it work for them.

 

[lisaviolet]

Interesting conversation. Really.

Honestly I was surprised - and actually saddened - that everyone looked at the nutritional information on the item at your get together. I don't know. Part of me doesn't like that. It's like in Europe. Food is just food. It's a pet peeve of mine in North America. Don't mind me. It's like everyone knows the nutritional content - yet so many of us are overweight. But I do know it's a successful tool for many. Just not for my life.

I find the thin/lean/normal weight people around me - and this isn't a judgement just a fact - don't care about the calories/fat content etc. etc. I asked a couple today after reading your post to give me a percentage of time that they do this thought of calories/nutritional information. Around 5% of the time.

(I know that there are lean/thin people that really watch everything - they're just not in my life )

I think most of us are educated on whether most foods are healthy or not. I've lost over 78 pounds and am nearing goal. I eat everything. Nothing is off. Healthy or crap. Just depends what I love. Sometimes that's healthy food and sometimes it's not. And as far as seconds - I just try to eat consciously. Notice I said try. This was a way that worked/works for me. I know from this board that others see weight loss differently. But I need to say this - you can lose your weight and overeat sometimes and eat every type of food. Cause I have.

And thin/lean people do overindulge - have seconds - at times. Life.

So obviously I went off topic. As for the biscottis - I don't like them as well. And I don't eat anything that doesn't turn my crank so to speak. But if I did wouldn't have cared about the calories. And if I did love them I would have had as many as I consciously wanted to eat. Consciously to feel satisfied physically not emotionally (I use emotionally because that's what I used to do).

Everything in moderation has worked for me.

 

[JudyS]

...
There was this bucket of biscotti on the table. Almost every person looked at the nutrition info on the box before taking one. (Each was a little over 100 calories). The non-dieters only had one. The dieters seemed to rationalize that they were "only" 100 calories so they each had a few.

How do you "break" that mind frame and only have 1 without feeling deprived?
I personally didn't have any since I don't like biscotti, but I know I would have felt compelled to go back for seconds just like the dieters if I had.

There seems to be a lot of unanswered questions here. What about things that were really fattening (say, cheesecake). Did the non-dieters fill up on those? Maybe the dieters were just hungrier than the non-dieters, because they weren't eating the really fattening stuff.

Or, maybe the dieters were hungry because they hadn't eaten much the previous few days, and that's why they found the biscotti irresistible.

 

[DWGal210]

I second what a couple other posters have said - I think the "secret", if you can even call it that, is that those people that don't have weight issues 1) are more conscious about what they eat, but not in an obsessive way, and 2) they are probably not emotional eaters.

That has been my problem with dieting and keeping weight off. I would usually do it for some event, like a wedding or vacation, and then when that passed, I was back on to old habits. I know for me, the key is to approach healthy eating and living as just the way you live, not something special you're only going to do for a time.

I struggle with my weight too (I'm joining the Biggest Loser posters on the WISH boards!). What I need to concentrate on is making sure I get enough fruits and vegetables and when I decide to treat myself, not letting that treat go overboard. In the past, I've also used food as a reward (you got a good grade on that exam, go out to eat) and I need to stop that!

I have several family members who are thin and from what I've observed, their "secret" is to be conscious about it but not crazy. For example, they might have the potatoes and stuffing at Thanksgiving, but they pass on the appetizers beforehand. It's about making choices, I think.

Keep it up, everyone! We can really be a good source of encouragement to each other!

 

[adsrtw]

I guess I really have come a long way. Before I changed my way of life this summer, I was constantly thinking about calories. It was insane! Well, for the say of those who don't know me, I was diagnosed with insulin resistance this summer and was told I needed to cut out bad carbs or go on meds. I have been doing this since July and I do not consider it a diet at all. I feel 100% better ~ both mentally and physically.

If I want a treat, by gosh I have one! That includes my lattes, (even though they are sugar free), a slice of pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving, a slice of Apple Pie at Christmas, and chips and salsa with the girls yesterday. My point is this, I wouldn't have been able to stick with just this or that. Nope, I would have obsessed. I eat right most of the time and that allows me to have what I want on occassion ~ and not worry about sugar, calories, fat, or carbs!

My friends, life is to short to obsess over that stuff. We have enough other things going on in our lives. Right?

 

[MelanieC]

I haven't figured out the "secret" yet, because I still struggle. I've gotten to goal and slowly I'm back almost where I started. I want to figure out the secret. My mom said to me today, oh we haven't eaten that bad since you have been there. But we aren't eating like I eat at home when I"m in my weight loss healthy zone.

For those that don't struggle with the kind of weight problems we have, eating bad foods isn't a problem because its no problem to stop when the company leaves or they go back home from vacation. For those of us with problems, its like we look at food and gain weight.

I know I have issues with eating. Its sort of all or nothing with me. But I can eat just a little off my normal and I gain weight. Or at leat that is how it feels to me. But deep down I know I eat way more than I should, I eat out of emotions and stress, I eat like its my last meal because I know I'll be dieting again. Food is just way to important in my life and I really enjoy eating. The problem is that I eat like that with everything, instead of just the things that are really good. I know there are a lot of reason's my eating is out of control, but I haven't figured out that key yet.

I really want to figure this out and learn to enjoy the lifestyle. I enjoy eating healthy, but even struggle when I'm thinking about what places to eat at while at Disney. I see the healthy choices and think oh that sounds good.........but the fattening fried, creamy things I shouldn't eat sound good too. My wish is that I could learn to give up those fried fat greasy creamy things and get to the point where I don't feel I need to eat those on vacation. Because I go to Disney for over two weeks usually - it can be a real problem. I need to find a happy medium and venture out and try some new healthy items on the buffets.

I think a goal for 2009 is to try to find out why I do these things and replace these thoughts with healthy normal eating thoughts.

Maybe we should start a 2009 Discover why we eat like this thread. It could be a great topic throughout the year and we can discuss what we learn. Sort of like a support group.