I'll just go ahead and head a whole slew of other questions off at the pass here. In order to get the Military Room Only discount, which is 30/35/40% off of a value/moderate/deluxe resort on WDW property, either the service member or the spouse must book the room and check in, as they check your ID at the front desk when you check into the hotel. No ID, no discount. The military member his/herself does NOT have to be present on the trip, as long as the spouse is. My daughter and I always go without my husband because he is always deployed when we go, and I use my dependant ID at check in and receive my discount. You CAN book more than one room if you have a group going, under the discount, but once again, if you are the service member/spouse, you must be present when the rest of your party checks in.
If you are a non-spousal dependant, (as an example, if your parent is active duty or retired), you cannot book with a military discount. Member or spouse only.