Military Balls (bit of a vent)

[cm8]

Thank you for wording your comment nicer than I would have. I took extreme offense to this post. People who have no clue about the military really need to think before they comment. My DH has been Active Duty for the last 18 years and I am VERY proud of him and what he does. This is not an easy life. Out of those 18 years he has been TDY and deployed for almost 10. After this last deployment my DH did not come back OK. Anyone who thinks that the military allowances, the secure job, the health care and the pension makes up for that really needs to be slapped.

... We are attending the one being held here at the new JB Charleston, I am not really looking forward to attending, but in a way I can't wait to mingle with the fakest of the fake and some of the most arrogant and people whom we will refer to as "NO comment" because I would not want to offend anyone who has that title, I'll just refer to them as the OW's . Any how, this will be the first Joint base operation ball since the merger and I can't wait to see all the different uniforms together that night

 

[Swimalie]

Just going on a little tangent--regardless of whether or not you choose to attend the ball, please thank your husband (for me) for serving his country and know that he is appreciated!

I second this.

 

[ClarabelleCowFan]

... We are attending the one being held here at the new JB Charleston, I am not really looking forward to attending, but in a way I can't wait to mingle with the fakest of the fake and some of the most arrogant and people whom we will refer to as "NO comment" because I would not want to offend anyone who has that title, I'll just refer to them as the OW's . Any how, this will be the first Joint base operation ball since the merger and I can't wait to see all the different uniforms together that night

I grew up in Charleston (Dad was a Navy vet) and I was quite surprised to hear about the Joint Base merger. I can see how it makes sense from an operations standpoint but it must be quite an adjustment from those that have been there for awhile.

Please keep in mind that all OW's aren't the stereotype that you mentioned just as all EW's aren't the stereotype that some OW's make them out to be. It goes both ways. I think the whole class/clique drama is ridiculous and am lucky to be able to avoid it as much as possible (helps to live a half hour off post). I have friends from both sides of the fence and they are my friends because of who they are, not because of the rank they or their spouses wear.

To keep the thread on track, DH just changed jobs into a position with more responsibility and most likely with that will come more obligations to attend several formal events. Can you tell how excited I am at that prospect? (Tina why don't you fly down so we can go shopping together!)

To all the fellow military families - thanks for your service!

 

[hmdavid]

Please keep in mind that all OW's aren't the stereotype that you mentioned just as all EW's aren't the stereotype that some OW's make them out to be. It goes both ways. I think the whole class/clique drama is ridiculous and am lucky to be able to avoid it as much as possible (helps to live a half hour off post). I have friends from both sides of the fence and they are my friends because of who they are, not because of the rank they or their spouses wear.

What she said.

 

[grits98]

Thank you for wording your comment nicer than I would have. I took extreme offence to this post. People who have no clue about the military really need to think before they comment. My DH has been Active Duty for the last 18 years and I am VERY proud of him and what he does. This is not an easy life. Out of those 18 years he has been TDY and deployed for almost 10. After this last deployment my DH did not come back OK. Anyone who thinks that the military allowances, the secure job, the health care and the pension makes up for that really needs to be slapped.

Thank you. I had to rewrite my post four times to tone down my original thoughts and language!

I'm so sorry your DH's last deployment didn't go well. I have seen a lot of people suffering from these deployments/remotes in so many ways. I hope that your DH has now reached the point where he can avoid any more deployments and can just get to retirement.

My DH has also been in 18 years and has just been told he's up for yet another remote in the Middle East. Guess I'll be changing my ticker once we get his dates!

 

[Poohbear5]

My daughter and son-in-law just went to their first ball and a friend from church just went to her first ball with her beau.

My daughter merely spent the money for the tickets and considered it a nice night out. She's on a very tight budget so she went with a pretty dress that was in her closet already (purchased at consigment shop) and made do with shoes, purse, jewelry that she already had.

My friend beau purchased their tickets, she purchased new gown, matching purse and shoes and borrowed jewelry. She spent $350.

Maybe you can trade babysitting services with a friend and borrow accessories and such?

 

[cm8]

I grew up in Charleston (Dad was a Navy vet) and I was quite surprised to hear about the Joint Base merger. I can see how it makes sense from an operations standpoint but it must be quite an adjustment from those that have been there for awhile.

Please keep in mind that all OW's aren't the stereotype that you mentioned just as all EW's aren't the stereotype that some OW's make them out to be. It goes both ways. I think the whole class/clique drama is ridiculous and am lucky to be able to avoid it as much as possible (helps to live a half hour off post). I have friends from both sides of the fence and they are my friends because of who they are, not because of the rank they or their spouses wear.

To keep the thread on track, DH just changed jobs into a position with more responsibility and most likely with that will come more obligations to attend several formal events. Can you tell how excited I am at that prospect? (Tina why don't you fly down so we can go shopping together!)

To all the fellow military families - thanks for your service!

The merger is very CRAZY!!! The AF is the "head" of the operation so to speak, and the Navy fits in where they get in,
My husband is currently the MCO- LT Commander and it is very, very hetic, We( I am an MD employed by the"navy" now AF) have been very busy since the new NHC charleston opened last month.

Things are so crazy too since the new facility is also joint with the VA ambulatory clinic. It now reminds me of the old 437th medical group before they became the 628th due to the merger. It's really pretty and spacious! From what some of the Navy personnel told me, they dislike the fact that they now fall under the AF, but what can they say or do for that matter. It is truly a power struggle it seems, they feel they are losing their identities.

Thank Goodness they still have a separate command to report too cause I can see where it would get not so pretty. Also I know the civilians are very happy because all that fell under the Navy is now being paid under the AF and that lead to an increase in some of the salaries

I know not all OW's are overbearing, and the likes( the ones I know here in the Medical field are , and . They like to make scenes and get all dramatic like what's her name from Army wives Lenora? But it does go both ways. I have friends on both ends too and it so nice that we can all get together and have a blast

I can't wait to see how things will be in 5 years


SN: I'd join you and Tina on a shopping trip too, Maybe we could even throw in some massages too

 

[ClarabelleCowFan]

The merger is very CRAZY!!! The AF is the "head" of the operation so to speak, and the Navy fits in where they get in,
My husband is currently the MCO- LT Commander and it is very, very hetic, We( I am an MD employed by the"navy" now AF) have been very busy since the new NHC charleston opened last month.

Things are so crazy too since the new facility is also joint with the VA ambulatory clinic. It now reminds me of the old 437th medical group before they became the 628th due to the merger. It's really pretty and spacious! From what some of the Navy personnel told me, they dislike the fact that they now fall under the AF, but what can they say or do for that matter. It is truly a power struggle it seems, they feel they are losing their identities.

Thank Goodness they still have a separate command to report too cause I can see where it would get not so pretty. Also I know the civilians are very happy because all that fell under the Navy is now being paid under the AF and that lead to an increase in some of the salaries

I know not all OW's are overbearing, and the likes( the ones I know here in the Medical field are , and . They like to make scenes and get all dramatic like what's her name from Army wives Lenora? But it does go both ways. I have friends on both ends too and it so nice that we can all get together and have a blast

I can't wait to see how things will be in 5 years


SN: I'd join you and Tina on a shopping trip too, Maybe we could even throw in some massages too

Are there any plans to reopen Navy Hospital to the capacity that it used to be? Seems like such a waste of a facility just sitting there with only a few offices and such (or that is the way it was when we left CHS a few years back). Of course it's not in the best area of town but it's not that far from the CAFB. Just curious.

Heck yeah, I say we organize a huge shopping trip. There are some great consignment shops in Charleston/Mt Pleasant and I even know a good masseuse out on Kiawah.

 

[Maddle]

Man - this thread is rough! ...and it has pretty much veered away from the OP's complaint about the cost of the Ball.

Let me first address what's frosting me - My husband retired three years ago from a challenging (but certainly not lucrative) military career. He was a successful and high ranking officer. As a former Military Wife, I take exception to your description of "fakest of the fake" Officer's Wives. I was always polite and friendly with everyone. The few snooty crabs I knew...well, that die was cast before they married.

The Ball is a formal social occasion. It is NOT a casual evening of dominoes and pizza with the BFF and her husband. That is also a nice social occasion, but that is not The Ball. It just isn't.

The Ball means you dress up, you go and socialize with people that you don't know very well, but with whom you have something in common. They have a vested interest in your community and your spouses' work environment, just like you do. It gives you the opportunity to meet others and to see that there is more to your spouse's job than just his or her immediate coworkers.

The Ball serves a larger purpose than just a dinner out. There are rituals that bind you to others so that you know you are part of something bigger than just "a job." You put your best foot forward and make polite social coversation, and you don't drink too much, and you treat everyone with respect, and you smile, and you congratulate people on their new baby and their spouse's promotion and ask about their impending PCA, and how is your new job at the bank? and how do your twins like kindergarten?

Okay - I'll say it: you act like a Lady.

I think one reason people have a miserable time is because they leave the house that night thinking, "this is awful. Awful clothes. Awful people. Why do I have to put up with them? I don't even know them," when in fact it is a time to be appreciated for the loving spouse that you are, and part of something bigger than your immediate social circle.

Yes, I know not everyone can afford the affair, (and perhaps that is the fault of the committee)....but no one expects you to have a new gown everytime, and sometimes you have to politely decline because child care is a near impossibility. But to see it as a burden from the outset makes you resentful, and if you do go, doomed to a lousy night.

I think for the OP it is particularly important to participate BECAUSE she doesn't live on Base, and BECAUSE she doesn't have a spouse network, and BECAUSE there are a lot of civilians at work. The fact is, her husband IS in the military, and SHE is part of his world.

 

[iheartdisney]

The Ball serves a larger purpose than just a dinner out. There are rituals that bind you to others so that you know you are part of something bigger than just "a job." You put your best foot forward and make polite social coversation, and you don't drink too much, and you treat everyone with respect, and you smile, and you congratulate people on their new baby and their spouse's promotion and ask about their impending PCA, and how is your new job at the bank? and how do your twins like kindergarten?

Okay - I'll say it: you act like a Lady.

I don't think you have ever been to a Seabee Ball!

 

[Maddle]

Hmmm.....well, I didn't say "No one" drinks too much, I said "you" don't drink too much.

...and "too much" is a relative term, isn't it?

Anyway, I hope she goes....but I agree, those tickets are really expensive.

Which Ball is it, anyway, OP?

Maddle

 

[cm8]

Are there any plans to reopen Navy Hospital to the capacity that it used to be? Seems like such a waste of a facility just sitting there with only a few offices and such (or that is the way it was when we left CHS a few years back). Of course it's not in the best area of town but it's not that far from the CAFB. Just curious.

Heck yeah, I say we organize a huge shopping trip. There are some great consignment shops in Charleston/Mt Pleasant and I even know a good masseuse out on Kiawah.

Sorry, Just saw this..... The Old NH facility was supposed to be used a federal complex, but they have since stated that it is going to be sold.

Yes there are, Especially in Mt. Pleasant

A great masseuse on Kiawah is !! Maybe we can even play a round or two of golf ( miniture that is)