Messiness... Hereditary or a product of your environment?

[Charade]

 

[themilesfamily]

Hi Charade! Happy Birthday -- I came across your birthday thread on the board today.

I don't think it's either -- I think it's a personal choice about how you want to spend your time, (keeping things neat is time consuming!), and how much emphasis you put on your environment.

I do think some people who are super-messy -- hoarders -- I think that has roots in mental illness.

 

[Stacerita]

I think its both. If you come from a messy family, you are probably gonna have some of those traits. Then add your lifestyle to that.

 

[Breezie]

Interesting! I think I agree with it being a personal choice. My Mom cleans obsessively. I, on the other hand, am a slob. She cowers in terror when she visits my apartment.

Clutter honestly doesn't bother me. I feel like I can find things easier when they aren't 'put away'!

 

[addicted_to_WDW]

I'm a bit of a slob and come from a messy family myself. I can't bring myself to care too much about neatness. I'll clean on the weekends but during the week I'd let it get cluttered if left up to me.

DH, however, is a neat freak. I don't have to worry about cleaning because my own personal Felix Unger takes care of it for me. He's always tidying up.

DS seems to be somewhere in the middle.

 

[Katy Belle]

I think some people are born organized and others are born scattered. I'm scattered. I think that can carry over to messy vs neat, but of course a scattered person can LEARN to be neat, I agree that its a matter of priorities. I CAN be neat but it does take effort.

Katy

 

[NMAmy]

Interesting! I think I agree with it being a personal choice. My Mom cleans obsessively. I, on the other hand, am a slob. She cowers in terror when she visits my apartment.

Clutter honestly doesn't bother me. I feel like I can find things easier when they aren't 'put away'!

This is kind of funny to me. In my family, it seems to skip a generation. My grandmother was extremely tidy. My mom is really messy and always has been. My older sister and I are extremely tidy as adults although we were both very messy in high school.

DD is teenager messy, as well. She makes me laugh when she complains that her dad's house is too messy. I have to wonder how bad it really is if it freaks her out. She is showing signs of being tidy when she's older--she is obsessive about keeping her cd's and dvd's in alpha order and keeping pens, pencils, markers separated in different drawers.

 

[powellrj]

my DM was very neat and clean and I swore I would never be like that. Growing up we were never allowed to lie on the sofa and I swore my house would be comfortable and you can lay on the sofa and eat in the family room.

 

[MushyMushy]

Happy birthday.

Being adopted I'm constantly thinking about nature vs. nurture. I met my birth mother about 15 years ago and I'm amazed at how alike we are (even more alike than she is to the ones she raised). But I also picked up a lot of traits from my adoptive mother.

I got the double whammy with messiness. I grew up in a messy household and my parents have turned into major hoarders as they've grown older. I later found out that my bmother was a slob too. I guess that gives me a good excuse for having a messy house.

 

[Todd&Copper]

Were you watching the Clean House marathon on Style Network, by any chance?

I don't know. I think we can have a tendency towards clean or messy, but the actual cleaning may be learned behavior. Unless you are OCD, then maybe it is a disorder.

 

[java]

Messiness- a product of my enviorment- and by that I mean my 4 kids!

It is more clutter vs. dirty- but it still bothers me. (of course not enough to spend all day cleaning but it is a minor annoyance)
As a child I grew up extremely neat. To the Nth degree. I used to put cotton hankies on the pants hangers so my skirts wouldn't get a dent in them. But that was a result of living in emotional chaos - so I controlled the one thing I could - the neatness of my room.

 

[Jennifer S]

I think it's def. part hereditary. I grew up in a house with two sisters. The one sister and I and our mom are SUPER neat- my other sister (adopted) is a slob. We all were raised the same from birth so I think it's just the way you are.


Happy Birthday

 

[LBAK]

Personal choice. My oldest DD is a slob. I haven't seen her floor in years she has so many clothes on it. I think she has carpet down, I don't even remember. My youngest DD's room is as neat as a pin. As she's getting out of bed in the morning she's making it. Every drawer is super neat, now a thing out of place and she doesn't like clutter. Polar opposites, raised by the same parents, both of us fall in the middle by the way.

 

[Charade]

Personal choice. My oldest DD is a slob. I haven't seen her floor in years she has so many clothes on it. I think she has carpet down, I don't even remember. My youngest DD's room is as neat as a pin. As she's getting out of bed in the morning she's making it. Every drawer is super neat, now a thing out of place and she doesn't like clutter. Polar opposites, raised by the same parents, both of us fall in the middle by the way.

It will be interesting to see how your messy DD is once she's out on her own. I know that I had a room similar to hers when I was growing up. As I got older and lived on my own I got neater. I'm not as "neat as a pin" by a long shot but MUCH better than when I was a teen.

 

[JB111107]

I don't think environment really plays much part into it. I'm one of 5 kids, my sister, who was quite a bit older than I am (7 years older) shared my room. She was somewhat clean. I was not. My younger brother is clean to the point of possible OCD on some things, others he could care less. My other brother had science projects growing in his room. Mom kept the house pretty neat, and we were always being told to clean our rooms so she DID try. Of my three kids, 2 are kinda messy, one is semi-clean. He tries anyway, but when it comes to their clothes none of them can keep a drawer straight.

I always used the excuse that messiness was a sign of creativity, and I never had trouble finding anything, because it was all laid out in front of me Today I have "stuff" but my house is not dirty. It is somewhat cluttered but 3 kids plus baby on the way just makes life a little chaotic. The worst room is my spare bedroom, which doubles as my sewing room/storage room for all DH's military gear.

18 years of military gear, 2 branches of service, in 3 climates=alot of crap. I have a closet full alone of nothing but various uniforms for desert, woodland, army, air force, etc. plus a few extras he's picked up, and thats before you get into all the bags, pouches, vests, boots, and gadgets. He's a self-professed gearhead, and it clearly shows. Couple that with all my fabric stash, 3 sewing machines, and enough camo fabric to choke a horse spread out (making my baby's bedding) and its quite scary in there!

 

[Mahnahmahnah]

I think it's a personal choice, too.

I try my best to keep up on everything so it never gets to the point of messy. Yet my family are "clutter bugs".
My DH can be messy. He grew up with 5 other kids. My DMIL swears it's her fault. She says it was just easier to pick up after all of them.

But you should see how neat and clean the tool shed is

 

[puffkin]

I really don't know

My house growing up was always cluttered but very clean. My mom came from a neat as a pin and very clean house, my dad from a cluttered and not very clean house.

My own house is pretty clean and pretty neat. My DH hates clutter and is borderline OCD so everything has a place and is neat and orderly. Our house used to be perfect, until we had DS....now things are a bit more disorganized and I don't stay on top of the cleaning like I did before (but we have a lady come in every other week, so the house still stays pretty clean). Our house now drives me CRAZY, but our friends relatives come in and think it is spotless and want to know how we do it. We get asked "is your house always like this or did you clean up for us?" question a lot

I guess I think it is mainly a product of environment but that some heredity does come in.

 

[TinkerbEllnor]

I'm a big believer in entropy as it applies to housework. Once you realize the universe *wants* to be disorganized, it is easier to submit and roll with it