For those of us who live across the southern tier of the United States from Texas to South Carolina, the common love bug, Plecia nearctica Hardy, is a common sight this time of year.
This picture (courtesy Texas A&M) is what love bugs look like to a southerner.
Yep. That's what they really look like. They're most often seen in flight and crawling around in exactly this most compromising position. Every day for four weeks at a time. Twice a year. Everywhere you look. All day long.
They're not bad bugs.
They don't bite. They don't damage crops. They don't fly at night. They're not an environmental hazard. They're just...
Annoying.
Love bugs, you see, live to love. In the picture above, the big one's the female, and when she's filled with that loving spirit, she waits until 10 a.m. and climbs up onto some foliage. There, she waits for a squadron of boy bugs to come flying over.
The guys will have been aloft for about an hour or two by then, just hovering into the wind and trying to make themselves look attractive.
When a likely group flies over, the female springs into action, launching herself right into their midst, whereupon great excitement is unleashed. Sooner or later, a hopeful male will dart over and drape himself upon the back of the female. Now, this is a bug with an agenda. He wants the female to find someplace less crowded. His hope is that the flight will quickly disperse and leave him alone with his lady-love. At the same time, other, possibly more macho boy bugs are determined to dislodge the suitor. They dart in, and he holds on for dear life - his own and his progeny's. Even worse for him, the actual mating takes from a minute to ten minutes, in which time he has to hang on, get coupled, and turn around in the opposite direction to complete the deed.
Once successfully coupled, nothing on earth will ever sever or dis-sever their love. In fact, after the act is done, the male becomes just so much dead weight. The lady love bug turns her thoughts to being momma love bug, and she simply flies off. Unfortunately, daddy is still sort of locked into momma, and that's the familiar perspective we Southerners get to see, as in the drawing above. If he's lucky, she'll drop him off (or rub him off) on a handy bit of foliage. If he's unlucky, she'll just keep flying along with him haplessly in tow. (Dr. Phil Koehler, of the University of Florida says they like to "fly united.")
Don't feel bad about the losers, however. There's a second daily flight scheduled for 5 p.m., and four entire weeks for them to get lucky.
The female then lays her eggs. Her average life span is about 68 hours, but if she's got it in her to rise again, she can extend her life to about 89 hours, which is the only evidence I've ever heard of that this particular act can extend one's life span!
Now, all that's lovely, isn't it?
Actually, the problem with love bugs is that they also love things they should not. Like asphalt. And hot engines, vibration, and diesel exhaust. Naturally, this love leads them to our roadways where they encounter trouble.
Splat! Splat! Splat!
Sometimes hundreds of these copulating bugs per minute. Splat on the windshield, the mirrors, and the fins of the radiator. With enough love bugs, visibility through the windshield is reduced. Add enough love bug carcasses, and a car will overheat.
Love bug bodies are slightly acidic all by themselves, but if they remain in place on a car's finish for one or two days, bacterial action causes them to become more acidic, and they can etch car paint.
Dr. Koehler says that a love bug's "one important natural enemy is a car."
You may be wondering about the love bugs' contribution to the greater good. Other than exhibiting inspiring behavior in the face of adversity, their larvae do serve a useful function. They recycle organic matter.
More little known facts about love bugs
They were first described in 1940, by an entomologist named Hardy who lived in Galveston, Texas. Now they range from Costa Rica to South Carolina.
Deforestation and possibly the influx of cattle have added to love bug population density.
In most areas, flights take place during April to May and August to September, but in portions of Florida there is an additional flight in December.
Love bugs congregate at intersections, traffic lights, filling stations, and truck stops. They love diesel exhaust, warm car hoods, and engines.
The myth that love bugs eat mosquitos is totally unfounded. Adult love bugs are vegetarians.
Likewise, the myth that lovebugs were created by an experiment gone horribly wrong at the University of Florida is not true.
Love bugs are attracted to anethole, an essential oil found in some plants. This is what scientists use to bait sticky traps to catch them.
Sources
University of Florida Entomology Department
Love bug, Scientific Name: Plecia nearctica Hardy
Florida Environment Radio
Little to Love About Love Bugs
Florida Entomologist (vol. 83, no. 1)
Seasonal Flight of Plecia Nearctica in Southern Florida
Copyright (C) 2000 Lamar Stonecypher
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And the car was new and shiny at the time, too. And I am driving down next week, too. Probably have to pay for a detailing when I get back. I doubt I have time to buy a nose protector thing for my car, and those things are very expensive. 
I hate love bugs. If you drive into a swarm, they CAN smear all over your entire windshield, and block you vision! They can be dangerous, unfortunately. 
You are too funny.
They were REALLY bad all over the front of our rental house - we had to sweep every day just so that we could walk in without tracking them into the house. They like to ride in on stuff, too. 
When they are really bad - you can sometimes smell them from inside the car.
