Little Ones, Meltdowns and ADRs

[AllyReggie]

Hey guys,

I have tried looking in the three different relevant areas of the forums for an answer on this and I am just not finding it, so I apologize if this isn't the right place, but I am hoping families will understand my dilemma better than the DDP or ADR peeps.

I am a planner, and I want back up plans for my back up plans but one of the areas I am just not 100% sure of is due to our foodie family status. We got the FDP and upgraded to the DxDDP because we just want to eat without crunching numbers, and eat whatever we want at the restaurants I have carefully curated for our group of 4 adults... but.

But we will have my then 1.5 year old (21 months) with us on this trip and I'd like to know if CMs at restaurants will be forgiving of an ADR for 4 adults (and 1 infant) if only 3 adults show up, or if we will have to pay the $10 for me even if they explain I am dealing with a melting down child? If it isn't a buffet, might they let my husband order me my meal to-go?

I get anxious (making reservations,) but because of the restaurants we want to go to (BOG, CRT, etc...) they are pretty much required. But you can't schedule a Babies meltdown.

Basically what I am hoping to find is experiences, recommendations and ways to help me still be able to eat if the nightmare happens. My little girl is SUPER good with travel, and doesn't really nap even now. We have taken her to all day rodeos, concerts, hockey games and other events that have completely run her out. Worst that has ever happened is she passes out and can't be woken, even by 4th of July fireworks.

But I don't want to operate without a plan for if we are heading to a restaurant and she loses her mind for some reason. I want to know what to do. Hopefully all that makes sense!

Edited to make the ADR thing clearer!

 

[SirDuff]

Showing up with three people rather than four is not a problem.

However, I'm confused - unless you're planning on leaving your child to her own devices during the meltdown, won't TWO people be missing (you and child)? So, you'd go from four to two (or five to three). The little one needs to be on the reservations.

 

[AllyReggie]

Showing up with three people rather than four is not a problem.

However, I'm confused - unless you're planning on leaving your child to her own devices during the meltdown, won't TWO people be missing (you and child)? So, you'd go from four to two (or five to three). The little one needs to be on the reservations.

Sorry, I made that sound complicated.

We have 4 adults (Myself, Husband and My Mom & Dad) PLUS my little one. So it would just be me and her missing, but since she doesn't count as an adult (or even a child in Disney's eyes... they see her as an infant) I didn't know if they would care if she isn't there or not. She will always be included in ADRs if they give me the option on MDE to include her... but most things seem to ignore those under 3yo.

 

[SaintsManiac]

Sorry, I made that sound complicated.

We have 4 adults (Myself, Husband and My Mom & Dad) PLUS my little one. So it would just be me and her missing, but since she doesn't count as an adult (or even a child in Disney's eyes... they see her as an infant) I didn't know if they would care if she isn't there or not. She will always be included in ADRs if they give me the option on MDE to include her... but most things seem to ignore those under 3yo.

You always count under 3s in ADRs due to occupancy reasons.

 

[AllyReggie]

You always count under 3s in ADRs due to occupancy reasons.

I figured, and I assume MDE will give me the option to include her in any reservations I make via the online system, so I wasn't overly worried about that situation, moreso I was concerned that they'd be unhappy that our party wasn't fully "there". I know I was told that they often wont see you until your whole party is present, but I don't want my parents and husband to have to wait on me if I might not show up!

 

[DisneyWishes14]

As others have said, you need to count everyone when making your reservation. If it's 4 adults and 1 child, you need to make ADR's for 5 people. If you show up with less people, you will not be penalized or charged a no-show fee. When you check in, you simply say, "there are only 3 of us now" and they will seat you (or your parents/DH, etc.) IMHO, if you are afraid you are going to miss meals due to a child melting down, I would reconsider the DxDP as, if you miss meals, you may end up with a ton of unused dining credits.

 

[MissManda]

We took our son when he was 18 months and again at 2 1/2. We actually had planned mostly counter service meals because we wanted to be less restrictive and we could work around his moods and meltdowns. We actually added numerous last minute ADR's because we found on both trips that needed that time for him to cool off, rest, and and relax inside. It is easy for the little ones to get over stimulated and the TS meals allowed him time to chill out and we didn't have any issues at all with him melting down inside and one of us having to take him out. If your little one isn't able to make meal time, I'm sure they will be understanding. I would stress out about it too much. Have a fun trip.

 

[AllyReggie]

As others have said, you need to count everyone when making your reservation. If it's 4 adults and 1 child, you need to make ADR's for 5 people. If you show up with less people, you will not be penalized or charged a no-show fee. When you check in, you simply say, "there are only 3 of us now" and they will seat you (or your parents/DH, etc.) IMHO, if you are afraid you are going to miss meals due to a child melting down, I would reconsider the DxDP as, if you miss meals, you may end up with a ton of unused dining credits.

Thanks. I guess my inability to correctly communicate that I understand I'd need to include her in an ADR is making this more complicated than it needed to be. I am making all of my ADRs through the MDE and as such it lists her as available to include in the reservation, making it near impossible for me to forget her or not include her. My intention, in pointing out the 4 adults being present versus 3 is that these would be the people getting meals, and if they reservation suddenly dropped a meal, would the restaurant demand compensation for that or not. The answer to that question appears to be no, but I worded it incorrectly, so that is why I think I confused a lot of people.

And no, I have already done the math and the DxDDP works best for us. I am not THAT concerned that I will miss an ADR due to my child. She is, as I said VERY good at travel. But I'd like to have a plan in place if a situation arises where I need to take her to a Baby Care location while the rest of the group goes to an ADR. I don't want to GET to the park, have her meltdown and not know what to do. I like to plan for every possibility I can think of and go into the trip knowing I don't need to stress because if something comes up, I know what to do.

 

[AllyReggie]

We took our son when he was 18 months and again at 2 1/2. We actually had planned mostly counter service meals because we wanted to be less restrictive and we could work around his moods and meltdowns. We actually added numerous last minute ADR's because we found on both trips that needed that time for him to cool off, rest, and and relax inside. It is easy for the little ones to get over stimulated and the TS meals allowed him time to chill out and we didn't have any issues at all with him melting down inside and one of us having to take him out. If your little one isn't able to make meal time, I'm sure they will be understanding. I would stress out about it too much. Have a fun trip.

This is exactly my thinking! I am hoping that a nice relaxing meal in a not-as-stimulating environment like a Table service will be a good recharging platform for her.

My whole family is totally foodie too, so we are really wanting to experience those awesome TS meals and get out of the hustle and bustle. Its like our version of a break from the action!

I am going to try not to stress it, but it is good to hear that other people use Table Service meals too cool down!

 

[sponica]

This is exactly my thinking! I am hoping that a nice relaxing meal in a not-as-stimulating environment like a Table service will be a good recharging platform for her.

My whole family is totally foodie too, so we are really wanting to experience those awesome TS meals and get out of the hustle and bustle. Its like our version of a break from the action!

I am going to try not to stress it, but it is good to hear that other people use Table Service meals too cool down!

I went with a 20 month old and pretty much only did table service meals. They don't care if you show up with fewer than on your reservation.

The key to avoiding hangry meltdowns is scheduling meals earlier than your kiddo would eat, so lunch at like 11 or 1130 and dinner at say 5. Le Cellier was a nightmare for us because we had to wake her up from a nap to get her in...but once we learned that if we reclined her stroller she'd nap, we were golden. She also napped through the entire time we were at Tiffins.

 

[HopperFan]

You can show up with less, as long as one person shows no penalty fee.

It is suggested you not show up with more than you booked, they can turn you away and then there might be penalties. You are 5.

Only issue would be “prepay” they might use up the credits anyway since you’d be past your cancellation time.

 

[AllyReggie]

You can show up with less, as long as one person shows no penalty fee.

It is suggested you not show up with more than you booked, they can turn you away and then there might be penalties. You are 5.

Only issue would be “prepay” they might use up the credits anyway since you’d be past your cancellation time.

Yeah. I figured. But the way I look at it is, it would be the same situation if someone got hurt, or sick. It is the risk I take making any kind of reservation. We might end up pre-paying for Spirit of Aloha, and not being able to go because our bus gets a flat tire and we can't get a minnie van in time to be seated or something random and weird. We are going during Hurricane season so anything could happen. I just like to know I did my best to plan for most of the common issues!

Thanks for helping me feel better about all this you guys, you have been super great!

 

[AllyReggie]

I went with a 20 month old and pretty much only did table service meals. They don't care if you show up with fewer than on your reservation.

The key to avoiding hangry meltdowns is scheduling meals earlier than your kiddo would eat, so lunch at like 11 or 1130 and dinner at say 5. Le Cellier was a nightmare for us because we had to wake her up from a nap to get her in...but once we learned that if we reclined her stroller she'd nap, we were golden. She also napped through the entire time we were at Tiffins.

Yeah! That is smart, and that will also mitigate the crowds too! Early Dinners are always better!

 

[LongLiveRafiki]

We've showed up with less and they never blinked an eye. They always confirmed with us the number of people when we checked in. If we said we were still waiting for someone, they wouldn't check us in until they got there, but if that person wasn't coming, we'd tell them it was 1 less and no issue. Now, if it's a situation where you think you'll just quiet little one down for a few and hop on over to meet up with everyone, they may not be able to add you back if theyve already been sat since the table might not be large enough to accommodate you. Hopefully that makes sense.

 

[AllyReggie]

We've showed up with less and they never blinked an eye. They always confirmed with us the number of people when we checked in. If we said we were still waiting for someone, they wouldn't check us in until they got there, but if that person wasn't coming, we'd tell them it was 1 less and no issue. Now, if it's a situation where you think you'll just quiet little one down for a few and hop on over to meet up with everyone, they may not be able to add you back if theyve already been sat since the table might not be large enough to accommodate you. Hopefully that makes sense.

Makes perfect sense. Hoping I never have to use this info but better to know what I am getting into!

 

[sponica]

Makes perfect sense. Hoping I never have to use this info but better to know what I am getting into!

If they're mid meltdown you can always check in as the full party, send the rest of the party in while you calm your kid down. Le Cellier offered to let us stick our daughter in her stroller if it was a small umbrella one.

 

[AllyReggie]

If they're mid meltdown you can always check in as the full party, send the rest of the party in while you calm your kid down. Le Cellier offered to let us stick our daughter in her stroller if it was a small umbrella one.

That is actually a really good idea.

I have never actually experienced a full meltdown. I am blessed that, at least as of now my daughter has been an outgoing, social and easy to appease child who, as long as you don't REALLY piss her off, can be calmed by being held in your arms and walked around for a few moments.

But I am a First Time Mom and I know as she develops her attitude will change, so while I am optimistic that she will remain my carefree child who can go for 12+ hours on a stroller nap and delicious snack and plenty to look at... I don't want to be naive and think that she couldn't have one of those meltdowns you see in the videos where the kid didn't get to hold the sharp/dangerous object and now they are on the floor kicking and screaming at the top of their lungs.

Everyone has their breaking point right?

I think Spirit of Aloha will be the easiest cause there seems to be plenty of room to "step out" if she gets fussy. But places like the Hollywood Brown Derby are harder since they are more of a fancier dinning experience and I don't remember there being any sort of... separate area to hide in.

 

[annadreamsofdisneyworld]

We took my daughter at 14 months and my son at 20 months. Both did great at sit down meals, though we tended to do just 1 sit down meal a day and the rest quick service. I suggest scheduling some character meals if you haven't done so already. My kids loved them at age 1. Personally I wouldn't hesitate to give my kid my phone to play with in the restaurant if he started acting up. Or you could bring other things to entertain her so that you can get through the meal.

 

[AllyReggie]

We took my daughter at 14 months and my son at 20 months. Both did great at sit down meals, though we tended to do just 1 sit down meal a day and the rest quick service. I suggest scheduling some character meals if you haven't done so already. My kids loved them at age 1. Personally I wouldn't hesitate to give my kid my phone to play with in the restaurant if he started acting up. Or you could bring other things to entertain her so that you can get through the meal.

So far we have been fighting not to give her a phone when she gets fussy, although I will admit to giving it to her in selfie mode because she loves looking at herself in the camera and I don't often carry a hand mirror about...

I have absolutely nothing against people who do give their kids tech, but honestly the thing that entertains her the most is my funny faces!