Kids...the ultimate question

[Dopey's MIL]

There must be as many happy families as there are not....when the final day approaches and we ask ourselves......what did we expect and what did we get from our Disneyland vacation?

I have a friend plannng a trip later in the year and I can almost bet that...right now...she is on cloud nine with her plans and expecting that her children are going to share in her joy.

However, what's really going to happen...none of them know or understand the Disney joy or magnitude of the park for the first time.

I for one...know from experience as a young child visiting the park every summer with my parents....

As a daycare provider..............taking childern who might not ever get to go to Disneyland...at the age of 5....I tell them months in advance that "the more patience we have the more fun we have."

I plan for the event...we talk about what we MIGHT buy...what we WILL eat,
WHERE we stay, how LONG we might stand in a line for the rides or shows...and what we will see when standing on the sidewalk for a parade.

I'd like to hear from any parent with advice for the first TIMER in the park with kids between the age of 3 and 12.
I know I'm stepping out on a limb here..................

I don't know how else to spell it out....you all give it a shot!!!

Kids can ruin a vacation.........am I not right? After all, they are kids but what can we do in advance to help their first disney experience be the best it can be?

 

[TheAmazingSpidey]

Sorry, but--


TOO MANY DOTS!

 

[abby]

When I planned our first DL vacation I read the unofficial guide to DL and learned parents often have very different expectations then the kids. Reading the advice they gave saved our first vacation.

I learned to be patient, when I want to run (OK walk fast) to the next ride and there is a character the my dd wants to stand in line to see.

I learned to pace ourselves so she didn't melt down.

I learned warning her in advance of what to expect was a big plus.

I learned dragging her on a ride she did not want to ride or was scared of was not OK.

we have had four fabulous vacations to Dl ( she is now 7 and 1/2) and we always have a great time, but my expectations are much much different then when I planned our first trip.

 

[Dopey's MIL]

Thanks Abby, it is hard for the first time parent to take their older childern...there are so many preconcieved ideas....I have learned that in the many years of fun at Disneyland. Thanks again

 

[Monkey Monkey]

I think planning is key.

Plan your daily itinerary in advance and be prepared for any changes that pop up during the day.

Discuss the itinerary with the kids so they feel comfortable and can envision their day, rather than just doing everything spontaneously, which can lead to confusion and *******.

My parents took me to WDW when I was 11.5, and the fun was really lost on me. I was too young to appreciate the experience, and too old to be excited about seeing the characters and whatnot. I was a typical tween and was embarrassed to be with my parents and would have rather hung out on the beach all day.

But then again, this was 1987 and I wasn't into Disney movies. If Little Mermaid and Beauty and the Beast had been out already, I might have been more excited.

 

[trodrigue]

I thought the dots were fine.......like you were gathering your thoughts.
I understood you just fine!

I think key is setting your own parental expectations and planning for some ways to have some childfree time to meet your own needs. This is hard to do, as Disney tends to be Family time, at least for us. But I have learned, that I really need to do that. I sent my hubby back to the room with the kids the last trip and went and watched Fantasmic by myself. It was awesome!

As long as I prepare, I am okay to go with the flow and follow my kids lead. I do try to direct them to avoid crowds and maximize rides and minimize wait times, but I also stop to play on the tractors etc.. When nobody wants to interact with the characters, I just go with it, even though I love the pictures. Oh well!

Just know the potential and have a flexible mindset. You will have a great time.

 

[Leofoenget]

I must have too many kids.........................running around my house........................, what was ...............the question again................................?

 

[bumbershoot]

I ellipses.

"Kids can ruin a vacation.........am I not right?"

I don't think you are right. I think that it's the parents that can ruin a vacation, when they run roughshod over their kids in order to have the perfect vacation. (see my trip reports for how I run DH and DS ragged each time we go...I had to do a solo trip to experience the parks like I want to, in hopes of getting it out of my system so I can be more Zen when I'm with them at DLR again)

And in our case, if I let DS eat the wrong thing, then that can ruin things to. That means, for us, anything with 1. corn syrup, 2. corn syrup solids, and/or 3. high fructose corn syrup. So Dole Whips (2), Uncrustables (1 and 3), special cookies with their special frostings for decoration (1 and 3) are out. I don't mess with the ice cream at the parks for him, b/c so many ice creams have corn syrup and HFCS in them, and even if they don't, their sauces and syrups most likely will. Also pancake syrups are out, b/c they aren't real maple syrup, and therefore have #3 in them. Luckily he's learned to enjoy a pancake with butter and powdered sugar; also lucky that he's not so sensitive that the cornstarch that powdered sugar has in it causes a reaction!

So anyway, if I let him eat something that has a dragon-making ingredient in it, then it's still my (or DH's) fault when he starts breathing fire.


My trip reports show trips from when DS was about 16 months to 3.5, except for the one linked with the words "the carousel" which details the trip where I left my family behind for 2 crazy part-days in Anaheim.

 

[JenDisneylandlver]

Once you have kids your expectations of everything has to change. Life is just different with kids. They don't ruin things IMO! But no Disneyland is a different experience with kids then before you have them. Personally I find it better!

My son was only a little over 1 years old when we took him the first time. Of course he didn't get all the Disney magic. I would hope most people wouldn't expect them to from ages 1-3. We've gone every year of my son's life pretty much and after around 4 years old, he got it. He's just as big of a Disney fan as I am. Has just as much fun as we do, and I enjoy watching it through his eyes more then I ever enjoyed it just being DH and I.

So yeah I guess the parents do have to have their expectations in check. Plan Disneyland just as they would anything else in life, taking their kids needs in to consideration. Life is different with kids, but that's not a bad thing to me!

 

[funatdisney]

Well I guess I don't have much to add, but I would bring lots and lots of snacks with you. For the toddler set, nothing falls apart faster than a hungry toddler. Waiting in line to get a snack may waste your time and energy (especially on a hot day). I have found having a few snacks on hand helps the older and younger set of kids manage their impatience and attitude. Even my DH loves that I have something for him. Make as many priority seatings as you can, at the time your kids would normally eat. I think this will go a long way to making your vacation a pleasant and enjoyable one.

 

[Dopey's MIL]

I stand corrected...to a certain point. "Kids can ruin a vacation........." Kids can disrupt any situation if the parent or adult doesn't plan well or intervene. But there are always those kids that no matter what you do...aren't happy and that makes for an uncomfortable time for their own family and those around them.

Thank you for letting me in on your ideas!

 

[teacups]

Our first trip WE PLANNED... but the kids were surprised! We told them a lot about surprises, fun, adventure... very few promises were made. I'M NOT CRAZY!


.........and lay off the dots complaining..........
let her talk the way she talks. DONT BE BOSSY!

 

[grumpy's fan]

I took my DD the first time when she was 2.5 (she is now 6). I had prepared her as much as I could - we talked about the crowds, how to wait in a line, give people personal space, how scary a large character might be and if you don't want to ride something just let Mommy know. Then I practiced with her....for example while waiting in the checkout line in the grocery store I would correlate that with waiting in line to ride Peter Pan. I let her play with old park maps (she loves maps) so by the time we got there she had an idea where stuff was and held our map all day to show us where to go.

I also brought her favorite snacks with us to the park and stayed away from all the sugar, left the park each day for her nap and let her set the pace (a hard thing to do for a Disney nazi like myself!). Now she's a touring pro and loves Disney as much as I do.

I have friends who insist that they don't want to take their kids until "they are old enough to appreciate it". Well my DD loved her trips when she was a young toddler and loves to troll through her autograph albums and relive the memories. We go at least 2 times a year and now she helps me plan the days.

 

[Dsny1sttimer]

I think that when planning a vacation for young children, you have to keep them involved. Show them pictures in the books, show them the websites of the places you are going. Then they know more about what to expect.
Also, I think it's important to realize that no matter how much you do plan, there will always be the unexpected that happens. Just be prepared "mentally" for this and try to go with the flow!
Kids will melt down when tired, hot or hungry. So, try to take frequent breaks, even sitting down for an icecream or snack can help them rest. Waiting in lines can also be a killer. I buy little trinket toys at the dollar store to keep them occupied while in line...like bubbles, small tubs of playdoh, we even took a bunch of pipe cleaners one year and played a game of making them into letters. It kept them busy, not thinking about the time we were just standing there.
Also, no matter what, if the kids are just not into the parks that day, maybe you could take a break back at the hotel for a swim, nap, and food. Then try again later. If you try to force the kids to have a good time, most likely, they won't! This is their vacation, too, so let them have at least a little input about what to do.

 

[Lillybelly]

Last year we took our 4 kids, who were 5, 3, 1 & 1 at the time. No amount of advance preparing would have helped them. But I needed to prepare myself for what this vacation would be like with the kids.

I know my kids and had to remember that just because we were on vacation they weren't going to magically change into perfect children who never whined, cried, fought with each other, got too tired, were too excited, etc. I had to be willing to modify my "prefect" day to fit into what the kids were up for. This meant that we accomplished about 1/2 of what we had planned. We needed to take frequent breaks, took alot of snacks, made sure everyone drank plenty of water. It took us longer to get from point A to point B because we had to walk at the pace of the 5 & 3 yr old.

It is easy to get frustrated when I don't get my way - but I also love my kids and want to share my love of disney with them. The joy when my DD-3 was told she a beautiful princess by Wendy, when my DS-1 cried when we had to leave eyeore, when my DD-1 tried to climb out of the boat in Pirates because she wanted the treasure, and when my DS-5 still takes about how cool Buzz & Star Tours were made it worth every tired tantrum that was thrown.

 

[Tink208]

Our older son's first trip to Disneyland was when he was almost 5. We didn't prepare or study, or anything, and he had a blast! Without any preconceived notions about what to expect, there were no disappointments. (I do admit it helps that this particular son has always been very adaptable and rolls with the ups and downs of life very well.) My husband and I each have our favorite rides and experiences and those are what drove how we toured the park. It was a great first trip for our son, and he definitely found the Disney magic.

We went on that trip with a good friend of mine and her 7 year old son (his first trip as well). They had studied and planned to such a degree that they wouldn't even try some rides because they had already decided they would be too intense/scary/dark/boring, just based on what they had read in guidebooks. And, there major disappointments when rides that sounded cool on paper were either a) not as cool, or, even worse, b) not open. (The kid totally melted down when it turned out Goofy's Bounce House was closed for cleaning when we first got to it.)

My tips for traveling with kids are the same regardless of whether we are going to Disneyland or going on a cross-country road trip. Number one on my list of priorities is making sure the kids have down time built into their day. (This also results in down time for mom and dad, which is good for everyone!) On a Disneyland trip, that means heading back to the hotel in the afternoons so that we can swim, or rest, or just decompress for awhile. It makes it much easier to take on the parks for the whole evening, if that is what we want to do.

Our younger son's first trip was this past November (he was almost 5 and 1/2), and he had reviewed our photo album from his big brother's first trip, so he had a few ideas about what to expect, but again we didn't do much else in terms of preparing him, and he had a total blast! (Though, in retrospect, I probably shouldn't have taken him on Space Mountain as his first ride. He liked it so much, he expected that ALL the rides would be fast moving, thrill rides. He kept wondering when POTC would start going fast...um, no, honey, this ride isn't that kind of ride. )

 

[jennifur25]

We took our boys to disneyland last year when they were 15 months and we had a great time. I think if you go in thinking "ok i want to do this and i want to do that and i have to ride this" then yeah, i guess kids could "ruin" your vacation. But.. I don't know.. to me, now that i have kids, a Disney vacation isn't about ME right now, it's about the kids, and experiencing Disney through THEIR eyes. I didn't ride a single "grown up" ride last time, (except Pirates and Haunted Mansion, which the kids rode also), and I was perfectly okay with that. But we rode all the kiddy rides, saw the characters, they LOVED watching the parades and I LOVED watching them watch the parades. I had to remind myself to watch the parades and not just stare at my babies

 

[tortugaverde]

Let me make sure I understand your question.... you are NOT a parent, but you do care for children at your home that are not yours right? You are concerned that your friend is not planning realistically for her family, because "kids can ruin a vacation". Am I right so far???

First of all, taking daycare kids on a trip is totally different than taking your family on one. Having kids is different than having daycare kids. You have way more patience, love and an all around connection with your own children than with someone else's kids. Sure, you might plan big.... dream big.... think big.... but when it comes down to it, you know it won't be perfect and you know things will change, because that is life with kids!

When I worked in daycare (pre kids myself).... I admit, sometimes they did ruin my day. It was a stressful job dealing with kids and their parents all day.

However, my own kids could be complete tyrants.... and they could NEVER ruin my day, nor my vacation for that matter. Even when my son or daughter is having a complete meltdown and I am feeling stressed out, sweaty and grumpy.... I can still look at her/his screaming face and think "gee, she kinda still has the same facial expression now as she did when she was just a baby... awww that is kinda cute" even though I am really mad!

Having your own kids is just different.

Just my two cents!

 

[Dopey's MIL]

I do have children of my own but they are grown. And I love taking daycare children to Dland. I've done it for many years during Memorial Day weekend and Labor Day weekend. I tell them 3 movies and a nap and we're there...

My real question boils down to this...as a parent you want your children to have a memorable experience. Especially if it's perhaps a once in a lifetime event.

If your children or even just one has a way of being really demanding, cries everytime they don't get their own way, pouts for hours on end, and can be a real poop in their every day experiences (well not everyday but you know what I mean...we all experience the behavior everywhere we go) how and what can we do before the trip?

That is what I mean by kids can ruin a trip for themselves and for the family. I never had a bad experience taking my three girls...and the only bad experience I had when taking daycare kids was finding masses of boogers wiped along the inside side of my brand new car in the third seat!!!

I love taking kids to Dland...not only can I have a vacation but I can tax deduct it as an extended field trip...

 

[daisy_77]

to the Disboards!

Everyone has given such great advice! There really is nothing left to say.

One thing I would try to do (since you are in the daycare biz) is to do a craft relating to the trip. Maybe make a countdown chain, calendars, mickey head rice crispy treats or cookies, etc. Disney.com has a arts and craft area with lots of fun activities. Here is the link: http://disney.go.com/magicartist/index.html You can also talk about a certain ride or show during circle time and what to expect from it. Circle time is also a good time to remind them of what you expect from them and the rules.

I would also hit up Dollar Tree for some low cost ideas for treat bags or a treat of the week that is Disney-themed.

In our house we are doing family movie night. Once a week, DD picks a Disney movie title from a jar. We make treats and watch the movie as a family. It is another great way to countdown to the trip. (I got this idea somewhere on the disboards.)

What a nice thing to do for your daycare kids!

I also just wanted to mention that I am from Boise too!