Kids and inappropriate movies

[Albertan mom]

I love movies. I love to go with my husband and eat that calorie laden delicious popcorn.

My kids love to go to the movies. However, there is so few they can watch these days! Besides the G Rated movies, there is barely any they can see.
Why oh why do they have to be so full of smut??

My daughters friends went and saw 'Going the Distance.' When I looked that movie up, there was no way my 15 year old daughter was going to go to it! They have sex on the table! There is over 70 F-words!! There is nakedness, ************, jokes about rape!
How do I know this? Because I go to :
http://www.pluggedin.com/
and look up every movie my kids ask to see. And if I find it inappropriate, they don't go!!

The rating system in Canada is much more lenient than in the US. So movies that are R rated in the US are 14A here. CRAZY!! It makes me nuts! So 14 year old kids go in with their friends and watch crude raunchy crap for 2 hours.

No wonder kids are having sex at such young ages, and little kids are dropping f-bombs. If parents let their kids watch movies like this. Kids are getting so desensitized. It frustrates me and makes me sad.

That is my rant of the night.

 

[MAH4546]

At 15 year-olds, a child is, IMO, old enough to see "Going the Distance." Yes, its raunchy, but honestly its no different than what children talk about in school.

 

[~Serenity~]

I totally agree with you.
It's ridiculous what they put in movies these days.

 

[superme80]

I completely agree with you. My parents wouldn't let me see a lot of movies growing up and I feel I am better for it. I watched some when I was older and didn't like them. People think I am crazy for keeping a close eye on what cartoons we let DS watch since he isn't even 2 yet. When your child comes crying to you when a commercial for WALL-E comes on then you can talk to me! Movies are so bad DH and I never go. The last movie was saw was Toy Story 3 because we got free tickets for Christmas nearly 2 years ago! I totally sympathize and say good work on keeping the junk out of you children's lives!

 

[bumbershoot]

No wonder kids are having sex at such young ages, and little kids are dropping f-bombs. If parents let their kids watch movies like this. Kids are getting so desensitized. It frustrates me and makes me sad.

That is my rant of the night.

FWIW, I was allowed to watch Richard Pryor at around 10, I watched all sorts of Mel Brooks movies, heck, I saw 9 1/2 weeks twice AT the movie theater as a teenager, and I was still a full adult when I chose to enter an adult relationship.

Although I agree with desensitization with violence, I think the other stuff goes to personal morals etc, not just what you see/hear.

Heck, my friends were reading Judy Blume's Forever in elementary school, ya know? And we made jokes about things one can do with one's self long before reading that...

When your child comes crying to you when a commercial for WALL-E comes on then you can talk to me!

I don't understand what that means.....

 

[KellyWasHere]

I know what you mean. I don't have too much of a problem with what they put in movies ... I enjoy me a good R-rated movie. What I do have a problem with is parents who take their children to see them, or let their kids see them. Some dad had his young kids, like maybe 7 and 9, with him when he saw the Hangover. My parents, in particular my mom, were very strict. I remember when Back to the Future came out in '85, I was 7 and it was rated PG, but she wouldn't let me see it because Alex Keaton swore quite a bit in it.

ETA:

At 15 year-olds, a child is, IMO, old enough to see "Going the Distance." Yes, its raunchy, but honestly its no different than what children talk about in school.

Sheesh, really? I don't remember ever talking about ************ or joking about rape with my friends. And even if they are, it doesn't mean their parents should be condoning it.

 

[mdsoccermom]

I know what you mean. I don't have too much of a problem with what they put in movies ... I enjoy me a good R-rated movie. What I do have a problem with is parents who take their children to see them, or let their kids see them. Some dad had his young kids, like maybe 7 and 9, with him when he saw the Hangover. My parents, in particular my mom, were very strict. I remember when Back to the Future came out in '85, I was 7 and it was rated PG, but she wouldn't let me see it because Alex Keaton swore quite a bit in it.

ETA:



Sheesh, really? I don't remember ever talking about ************ or joking about rape with my friends. And even if they are, it doesn't mean their parents should be condoning it.

Well, I 100% agree that rape is nothing to joke about, but what is wrong with a 15 year old knowing about ************ (which I am sure they've known about for quite some time)?

 

[golfgal]

Teenagers have been having sex for many, many, many years-it isn't something new nor is it because of what they see in movies. The only difference is that 40 years ago when a teenager got pregnant they sent her away to a "girls" school to have the baby and gave it up for adoption so you didn't "see" girls pregnant.

 

[MAH4546]

I know what you mean. I don't have too much of a problem with what they put in movies ... I enjoy me a good R-rated movie. What I do have a problem with is parents who take their children to see them, or let their kids see them. Some dad had his young kids, like maybe 7 and 9, with him when he saw the Hangover. My parents, in particular my mom, were very strict. I remember when Back to the Future came out in '85, I was 7 and it was rated PG, but she wouldn't let me see it because Alex Keaton swore quite a bit in it.

ETA:



Sheesh, really? I don't remember ever talking about ************ or joking about rape with my friends. And even if they are, it doesn't mean their parents should be condoning it.

I don't shelter my children from reality; hence I don't use child blocks and they have HBO in their rooms. I was raised that way - probably because I have European parents - taken to R movies when I was 7, watch whatever on TV, and I turned out just fine. The sheltering just goes to extremes in this country, its really sad.

Kids will hear curse words, for example, whether on TV, in school or from their parents. As long as they don't start repeating the words, I don't have a problem with it. Believe it or not, most kids can watch an R movie, and not have a desire to mimic the violence, repeat the words or try the sexual acts.

I personally wouldn't take my 7 year-old to see a raunchy comedy like "Going the Distance" or the "Hangover," (but by 13, a child is surely mature enough to see either of them, IMO), but I don't have a problem taking him to see an R-rated action film or horror film. However, if he was channel surfing and saw one of those films on HBO, so be it. He sure won't be traumatized by it, suddenly have an urge to steal a tiger or be changed by it. He probably won't even understand 99.9% of the sexual references and just laugh at the fact there is a tiger running around a hotel room.

 

[mjkacmom]

Well, dd14 can pretty much watch any movie she wants, but I do censor dd12 a bit (I wouldn't let him watch The Hangover). However, he has friends, I know he saw one of the Saw movies, he's not living in a box. BTW, my parents didn't censor what I saw or read as a teen. I wasn't scarred for life.

 

[paintnolish]

I work in a high school. I hate to break this to you, but if you don't think your kids already know about this stuff...
Like Bumbershoot, I don't have a problem with raunchy/violent/sexual media. Kids can't be given free reign with it, though. Parents need to make informed choices. I know my kids and what they can handle. IMHO, 15 year olds can handle a sex jokes. That being said, they are your kids. You don't have to let them see it just because "everyone" else is.

 

[Jennasis]

Well you know you're OLD when you start complaining about the smutt and garbage they put in movies "these days". Do you think this is NEW? Come on! Every generation of parents complains about the raunchy movies their kids are exposed to. When Rhett Butler cursed in Gone with The Wind, it caused a complete uproar.

 

[KellyWasHere]

Well, I 100% agree that rape is nothing to joke about, but what is wrong with a 15 year old knowing about ************ (which I am sure they've known about for quite some time)?

There's nothing wrong with them knowing about it, but I would object to my kids being exposed to at as it usually is portrayed in raunchy movies.

 

[Acklander]

It doesn't bother me if my kids hear swearing in movies. We'll pick a movie to see because of interest in the movie. DS10 hasn't seen any movies where the main plot was sexual, because he has no interest in it. He has seen movies where the sub plot had sex or bad language was in it - because the main plot was what he was interested in. His ears didn't burn off and he didn't start swearing like a drunken sailor. When looking for a movie to see at the theater we look for plot/action/who's in it etc..... I don't count how many f-bombs in making my decision.
He was about 7 when he saw Titanic (PG13) because he was fascinated by the story of the big ship sinking, his eyes just glazed over during the love scenes as it didn't interest him. He was about the same age when he saw Schindler's List (R). Again, he watched if for the fascinating story - it opened up a lot of questions for him, none of them had to do with language or sex. For a movie like Hangover - no we didn't see it, because the main plot didn't interest him at all. If you're only basing your movie choices over how many times the actors say a certain word, or if sex happens or not - you and your kids are going to miss out on a lot of great movies. Trust in your kids that they are able to handle hearing a word an know that it's not OK to repeat it or see a grown couple have sex without going out and having sex themselves.

 

[lovesmurfs]

I agree with OP! We don't have cable, so we really watch what comes into the house, and have taught the kids that just because others do/talk/say stuff, doesn't mean they have to. No rose colored glasses, but we can only give them the seeds to nurture.

That said, I bought Bad News Bears for the kids from the bargain bin one time, remembering how funny I thought it was -- DS (then 15) asked me to turn it off because of the language! Guess I only remembered the plot, not the language.

 

[LuvOrlando]

I'm with you 100% OP. I also love moves (see tons in theaters and on Netflix) and have been going as a family since my kids were toddlers, DS now 12 & DD now 11. I am also ridiculously disappointed with the garbage they throw up on a screen these days. Some movies would be fine for my kids if they would just lay off the F Bomb & nudity, so many times even by myself i just find myself shaking my head wondering , "Why?" I get it's useful for dramatic emphasis to to show a character's personality but come on there is a limit and then it's just foolish. Then there are the touchy feely scenes which are sometimes appropriate for the film, but most of the time they are just stuck in there because the directer seems to think every movie should have one. What is all that about? Are the cusses and nudity supposed to distract me from the fact there is no storyline, that the story is poorly told and written or just that the people in the film can't act? Some film is art, some of it is just artless... most of it is artless.

I hope someday the people who make movies would recognize a movie that could draw in a family of 4 with the parents deeper pockets than a date night couple would make more money for them, and make more films for us. if they would make better more appropriate stuff I would be at the theater once a week. I wish the ratings would tighten a little so I knew what I was getting myself into, at the moment the ratings are keeping me out of the theaters because it's all too unpredictable and for $50 I want predictable. Aren't the biggest grossing films the one's most of us can enjoy like Avatar, Lord of the Rings, Pirates of the Carribean, Harry Potter, Star Wars ect?

FYI, I know my kids have already been exposed to this stuff but to me there is a huge difference between them seeing/talking about it with their friends and my giving it a 2 thumbs up & a nod by watching it with them. My DH and I use "Kids in mind" to help us wade through the muck but in the end, sitting on my sofa with my finger on the fast forward button is the best way to deal with it.

The industry could have my $50 but if i have to worry about what my kids will see & hear they are only going to get $1 out of my Netflix membership and that's all there is to it. I vote with my money.

 

[Jennasis]

So I take it you won't be letting your kid see Machete?

 

[Hannathy]

It doesn't bother me if my kids hear swearing in movies. We'll pick a movie to see because of interest in the movie. DS10 hasn't seen any movies where the main plot was sexual, because he has no interest in it. He has seen movies where the sub plot had sex or bad language was in it - because the main plot was what he was interested in. His ears didn't burn off and he didn't start swearing like a drunken sailor. When looking for a movie to see at the theater we look for plot/action/who's in it etc..... I don't count how many f-bombs in making my decision.
He was about 7 when he saw Titanic (PG13) because he was fascinated by the story of the big ship sinking, his eyes just glazed over during the love scenes as it didn't interest him. He was about the same age when he saw Schindler's List (R). Again, he watched if for the fascinating story - it opened up a lot of questions for him, none of them had to do with language or sex. For a movie like Hangover - no we didn't see it, because the main plot didn't interest him at all. If you're only basing your movie choices over how many times the actors say a certain word, or if sex happens or not - you and your kids are going to miss out on a lot of great movies. Trust in your kids that they are able to handle hearing a word an know that it's not OK to repeat it or see a grown couple have sex without going out and having sex themselves.

I agree. Sounds a lot like my DS! Also if a kid is intelligent they are not going to be entertained or interested in "kid" themes which treat kids as idiots as far as I'm concerned, they want a more mature theme, dialogue and humor.
The sexual stuff will go over their head until they are ready for it and they know not to use adult language. My son loves the Office, does he dwell on the sex humor? not at all in fact the episode that have a lot of that are not re watched by his choice while other ones are watched many times. He loves the humor. He actually doesn't watch a single show that would be classified a kids show! What I should tell him to turn off the History channel or Discovery and put those stupid Disney shows on because they are rated G?

Also I don't consider a 15 yr old a child as far as movies and books go and didn't have any restrictions on my DD at that age. Give kids some credit if they have been taught and allowed to make choices they will monitor themselves and not choose to spend their time and money on smut movies. (and believe me what they are seeing, hearing and sometimes doing themselves at school and with friends is far from PG by 15)

 

[Liberty Belle]

Are you saying you only let your 15 year old go to G rated movies? Do you not have a PG rating there?

My 7 year old has seen a couple of R rated movies and several PG13 movies. We normally watch them first (always watch the R's first, but he's not seen many of those).

Sex and nudity doesn't bother me so much. Bad language does somewhat, because I don't want him to think it's cool and repeat it at school. So far he's doing fine with that.

The rape jokes would most definitely bother me. I have a 17 year old and I wouldn't want him hearing them. He's 17, though, so he can pretty much go to any movie he wants. He was watching R rated movies at 14 and 15 with his friends. He's an extremely polite boy who is respectful, doesn't curse around us (he has a couple of times - once when a huge spider was next to his head and a couple more in similar situations and then never the F word) and is just a good kid. I do not want to put anything about his sexual history on here (but you're welcome to pm me and I'll tell you in three words), in case someone knows me and him.

 

[marcyinPA]

At 15 year-olds, a child is, IMO, old enough to see "Going the Distance." Yes, its raunchy, but honestly its no different than what children talk about in school.

I respectfully disagree. I have a 15 y/o DS and he does not talk about stuff like this in school. He's no angel, but he's very sensitive to smut talk. I don't know if it's a coincidence, but he's also been raised in the church, is very active in our church and is a very good, Christian kid. He wants to be a youth pastor when he "grows up".

Kids do talk about stuff like that in school, but not ALL kids. Unfortunately, you can't really help what your subjected to in school because you have no choice but to be there. However, you don't HAVE to see these movies. Seeing the movies is a choice.

I never understand why parents feel that it is O.K. for their impressionable kids to willingly choose to see this kind of stuff. Or maybe the parents just don't care?!