Just getting this off my chest

[lizanne]

My son is graduating from college next Saturday. He was in a 5 year program and he decided he would commute to school, he thought there would be too many distractions if he stayed on or near campus. He left every day 2 hours before his first class so he would be on time, and the ride home usually took him 1 1/2 hours. This last semester on Tuesdays he would leave at 7:30 am and return at 10:30 pm.

He worked very hard and maintained a 4.0 GPA. This, his last semester, he had 5 classes, all of which required a group project as a major part of the mark. He has had many group projects in the past and always made sure the project was the best they could do (not because he said so but because when the group participants had to say who did the most he was always named #1). This time, because there were so many projects and he was working with a total of 13 different people he wasn't able to do as much on every project.

All of his individual marks in each class were A's, but in one class the group project didn't go as well as it could have. Well he got an 4 A's and 1 A- and there goes his 4.0.

He's not going to talk to the teacher because he said if that's what she thinks he deserved that he has to accept it. He doesn't want anything he didn't deserve. The only thing that has him upset is that it was a group project that pulled down his mark (teacher e-mailed him).

He's a smart kid with a good personality and many friends. He has a great job to look forward to and I know this is only the beginning for him, but I can't help but feel bad for him. I can hear it in his voice how disappointed he is.

Sorry this is so long. I don't really expect any replys, I just needed to talk.

Thanks for listening.

 

[Blueeyes101817]

o man ,thats rough!

im in college too (just finishing my junior year), and this semester i had a lot of group projects too. I also commute and its not easy to do the group projects that way!! This semester, there is one group project that my grade got lowered because of another person in my group--i actually emailed my professor...She talked to the other 2 members of the group (minus the one that was the problem) and since they both said the same thing, she raised our grade a bit..
He may want to try it, it cant hurt

 

[clh2]

Wow - that stinks.

But in the whole scheme of things - he's not going to not a job because of 1 lousy A-.

 

[Beth76]

You're upset because your son got an A-?

 

[minniecarousel]

That's part of life. Other people have the power to mess up stuff for you, even if you do the right thing.

 

[golfgal]

Can he audit the course for credit but take a pass/fail grade so it doesn't mess up his GPA?

 

[ChrisnSteph]

You're disappointed because he got an A-? It sounds like he's an incredible student and works very hard. I'd try not to focus on the grade he got and instead encourage him and tell what an awesome student he is, and how proud you are of all his hard work. Like someone said before, he's not going to be passed over for a job or judged negatively over being just below a 4.0.

 

[Snow Brite]

Oh that bites! I hate group projects! There is ALWAYS some fool who thinks that if they put their name on the paper they have done their fair share.

Hugs for you son to get that stupid A- so late in the game. His last semester!

I would also suggest talking to the professor. Its not easy to do, but I think if the teacher knew this was his first ever less than perfect A, they might realize it wasnt really him that brought down the group grade and make an adjustment. It is usually a matter of 10 points difference or something.

Good job though on all the hard work he put in to his education. He has done an excellent job and should be proud.

 

[tiggersmom2]

I understand the frustration of losing a 4.0 by a point or two. I too was an overachiever in college and was DETERMINED to graduate from nursing school with a 4.0....in my last class, I got a B.

Yes, I KNOW it wasn't a big deal but it was a personal goal that *I* wanted to attain for myself. Anyway, I am over it now and don't even practice as a nurse anymore...I prefer teeth!

 

[lizanne]

Yes, I KNOW it wasn't a big deal but it was a personal goal that *I* wanted to attain for myself.

You said it better that I did. He never expected to carry the 4.0 for so long, but by the time he finished his 3rd year it became a personal challenge.

We've told him how proud we are.

He knows that he can't control what others do but that sometimes the actions (or inaction) of others can effect him. He accepts it, but he doesn't like it .

 

[horseshowmom]

I understand your frustration completely. It's not that you're "disappointed" in your son for having an A- or that it will affect his job prospects. It's that he's worked his tail off all this time, and a group project has kept him from having that "perfect" 4.0 when he graduates.

My DD is a freshman and absolutely hates group projects. The truth of the matter is that a lot of time one or two students do most (or all) of the work to make sure it turns out well. While some people might say that they shouldn't do that and should just let the others fall on their face, the fact is that it affects them too much to do that.

(When DD was preparing the Powerpoint presentation for one of her group projects, one of the guys actually said, "Cool, you mean you can save pictures off the internet?" This is a major university...)

 

[ktpool]

Take heart...I've never had an employer ask what my GPA is/was. I am in school and have a 4.0, but whenever I tell my boss I got an 'A', he just rolls his eyes (in a funny way!).

Meaning, in the scheme of life, no one after graduation cares what your GPA is

 

[Val]

He might want to talk to the professor- but go armed with data......outline what his contribution was, the contributions of the others, etc.....prove his case. Don't bash the other students, just show that he did more than the others and that he was the leader. As professor, I will listen to a reasonable argument and make a change. Group projects are a fact of life- we are assigned to work on committees and in groups at many, many jobs. Unfortunately, group projects are no more successful in real life. If your son can prepare a strong argument he will be practicing for a real job- making the case for a promotion, a raise, etc. Again, be calm, be reasonable and be factual. As a prof, I respect a student that can make his or her case without bashing other. This is also a reason why I hand out a "who contributed the most and the least" grading sheet- I want to know how the group handled difficult situations and reward those who led rather than slacked. You would be surprised at the students who self report they did nothing when directly asked- and how few students are willing to "toot their own horn". It is usually the others that indicate who did the most work!

Good luck. In the end, it is how your son feels about the job done, and not about the grade. Congrats on graduation, and congrats on those impressive grades in spite of long commutes and hardships. I expect your DS will go a very, very long way in life!

 

[Dan Murphy]

I hear ya. And congratulations to him for a job well done.

 

[azgal81]

That's dedication right there getting up early just to drive to school and coming home late. He missed the 4.0 that sucks but what an accomplishment to get all As (yes I consider an A- still an A) he should be proud.