Jon and Kate Plus 8, Official Thread-Part 4

[luna99]

I took that differently. I thought she meant she didn't want to be alone in the raising of their children...as in, they were in it together I never even thought of another man in her life.

maybe that is what she meant but at least she has a ton of help when it comes to raising the kids.. I mean, if she doesn't have nannies, housekeepers, chefs, etc already.. she definitely could get them.. raising the kids on her own won't be easy, but she won't have it as tough as a lot of single mom's out there do that's for sure!

Kate from what we have seen does seem to cut people out of her life. It is Kate's way or the highway.

that is the comment my husband made... how kate's family doesn't seem interested in seeing her and she never talks about them... and how jon's family at least in hawaii did want to get together with them.. it does seem like Kate manages to push people away from her all the time.. which only reflects on her as a person.

I'm not saying I'm against kate and pro Jon.. because I really believe the two of them have made bad choices... but kate does seem very abrasive and like people in the "real world" just want nothing to do with her. I was telling my husband that kate is basically my age (she's a year older) and she just seems so much older than I do.. and I could never imagine myself being her friend or hanging out with her. I mean, maybe having 8 kids does that to a person... but a big part of it is her personality.

 

[Mom2Nick]

I am excited for the kids personally. They will get a chance finally to be happy. It will take some time but living with two people like that is not the best thing.

Kate treats Jon like a slave. He is never right. He never does enough. She degrades and demeans him - and he takes the path of least resistance and allows himself to be treated that way. IT IS NOT A GOOD EXAMPLE FOR THOSE KIDS!

Marriage is about compromise, give and take. It's about love and RESPECT. These people have not shown any of that to those kids. So far they thinks this joke of a a relationship is NORMAL!!! UG!

I think this could be the smack in the face Kate needs. She needs tyo be taken to the edge and dangled over so she knows that her way of treating people in general is despicable.

I think also that Jon has to get this out of his system. Sow your oats, grow up and move on.

This is the beginning of something that will turn out positive for those kids. The destructive part of their lives is starting to burn out.

 

[brockash]

I am not talking about the alleged affair, on her or his part, I am talking about about the 10 years of marriage. Affairs happen, I do believe a marriage can survie an affair. I do not know if either of them had one. I think if he did it would be from reaching his breaking point. He was not a habitual cheater, I believe you try not to get to that point, if you do work on the marriage.

That's a pretty crappy mindset. I guess if my DH has an affair, I should suck it up and deal with it Good luck with that. Anyone that's had spouse cheat on them, has every right to end the relationship, and it's pretty rediculous that anyone would fault them for it As far as J&K; I've gotta say with the photos and especially the Utah trip; it's pretty clear that Jon beyong a resonable doubt, most likely did have an affair. I've seen nothing to indicate that Kate did, so no I would never fault her if she wanted to end it, although that doesn't even seem to be the case here. It seems that this is really not her choice, but Jon's.

 

[newtodis]

Someone started Part 5:

http://disboards.com/showthread.php?t=2211115

Thanks...I started it and knew it would get lost in all the posting this morning...

Let's go to thread 5.

Good idea!

 

[Buckalew11]

Kate has treated him horribly throughout the course of this whole show. I also haven't seen Jon get a new haircut, chemical peels, and walk around with hundreds of dollars worth of clothing either. This obvioulsey was a loveless marraige and he wanted to explore other options. Yes divorce sucks, but it happens with 50% of Americans. And for people saying this will hurt the kids, it won't be the divorce but the continuing TLC covereage and Kate going on her "book" tours that will ultimatley hurt them.

Well, where have you been? Jon got hair plugs (which didn't do so well), is wearing hundreds of dollars of clothing--in fact, I bet kate's nice cloths are cheaper than Jon's Ed Hardy outfits. Jon may look like he's dressed in rags but he spent good money on his designer duds.

A loveless marriage? Not always. Explore other options? Surely you are kidding me. When you are married and have 8 children, other women are not options. Oh. My. God.

Divorce hurts kids. Don't fool yourself. While it may be best for mom and dad sometimes and it can also be good for kids to see their parents happy even if it is separately, divorce hurts a child's soul. It takes a lot of work to help a child through it and very often the parents are so busy trying to get themselves together and just live the day to day stuff that the kids suffer in silence---all the while everyone thinking "kids are so resiliant."
I hardly think a book tour is going to hurt a child. Filming may or may not...

 

[huey duey & luey]

Kate has treated him horribly throughout the course of this whole show. I also haven't seen Jon get a new haircut, chemical peels, and walk around with hundreds of dollars worth of clothing either. This obvioulsey was a loveless marraige and he wanted to explore other options. Yes divorce sucks, but it happens with 50% of Americans. And for people saying this will hurt the kids, it won't be the divorce but the continuing TLC covereage and Kate going on her "book" tours that will ultimatley hurt them.

you haven't? I have seen him get hair plugs, 2 earrings go to the gym, go skiing,buy a new car. Also, Ed Hardy jeans and sweatshirts that teenagers should be wearing aren't cheap either. I do not think Kate is blameless. I do agree with her when she said there were fundamental differences in the marriage. However, the fact that he is excited about the next phase in his life, speaks volumes about him as a person

sorry Buckalew: posting at the same time. GMTA

 

[Epcot luvr]

Wow...
I hate the "boys will be boys" excuse and this is just the same problem multiplied.
Men shouldn't "take so much" and then have a breaking point. I think right away men should speak up and set the precedence for their own treatment. I will agree that Jon did not do this at all (except for the episode where he said he liked it and it was their way of getting along) and he hit his breaking point. he hit that point when he found someone else's arms to run to also--never a good thing. Find yourself on your own and then allow another person into your life. The man has a lot of baggage no matter who he ends up with, that's for sure.

Again I am not talking about the alleged affairs, on eithers part. I am saying the men in my life are pretty good sports and put up with a lot. I have 4 sisters and 2 brothers all of us are in long term marriages, first marriages. I see how the wives can be a little more demandind and the guys are pretty good natured about it. They do have a breaking point, you can not belittle someone on a daily basis and not think they will finally shut you out. I do not hink Jon is a bad guy at all. And affairs to me are not the end of a marriage as long as it is not habitual. It is not something anybody wants to del with but the fact is they happen. 50% of all marriages end in divorce. The 50% that make it i am sure are not immune from affairs.

 

[OceanAnnie]

That's a pretty crappy mindset. I guess if my DH has an affair, I should suck it up and deal with it Good luck with that. Anyone that's had spouse cheat on them, has every right to end the relationship, and it's pretty rediculous that anyone would fault them for it As far as J&K; I've gotta say with the photos and especially the Utah trip; it's pretty clear that Jon beyong a resonable doubt, most likely did have an affair. I've seen nothing to indicate that Kate did, so no I would never fault her if she wanted to end it, although that doesn't even seem to be the case here. It seems that this is really not her choice, but Jon's.

I agree.

The bolded, has been pretty well documented. It was ongoing, with pictures.

 

[Epcot luvr]

That's a pretty crappy mindset. I guess if my DH has an affair, I should suck it up and deal with it Good luck with that. Anyone that's had spouse cheat on them, has every right to end the relationship, and it's pretty rediculous that anyone would fault them for it As far as J&K; I've gotta say with the photos and especially the Utah trip; it's pretty clear that Jon beyong a resonable doubt, most likely did have an affair. I've seen nothing to indicate that Kate did, so no I would never fault her if she wanted to end it, although that doesn't even seem to be the case here. It seems that this is really not her choice, but Jon's.

Affairs do happen
Hopefully you will not get to that point because you treat your husband and he treats you with kindness, love and respect.
Kate did not treat Jon that way in the least.

 

[brockash]

Affairs do happen
Hopefully you will not get to that point because you treat your husband and he treats you with kindness, love and respect.
Kate did not treat Jon that way in the least.

I'll never agree that because of the way your spouse treats you, it gives you the right to have an affair. -What it does give you a right to do is to end the relationship, if working on it isn't an option, or isn't working. 2 wrongs don't make a right.

 

[joviroxx]

Im sorry, I guess I just dont get the problem with Jon saying he is excited. When he was speaking, it was one of other emotions he was feeling. How does feeling excited about getting out of what was obviously a miserable situation (with plenty of fault to go around) make him a selfish callous guy?

Like I said before, my sister , among many emotions was excited to see what was out there for her after her divorce. We were excited for her. But it certainly doesnt take away from other emotions or the difficulty of the situation.

They were both miserable.. At no point did I hear Kate express her love or desire to be with Jon, she just said she didnt want to be alone.

 

[brockash]

Im sorry, I guess I just dont get the problem with Jon saying he is excited. When he was speaking, it was one of other emotions he was feeling. How does feeling excited about getting out of what was obviously a miserable situation (with plenty of fault to go around) make him a selfish callous guy?

Like I said before, my sister , among many emotions was excited to see what was out there for her after her divorce. We were excited for her. But it certainly doesnt take away from other emotions or the difficulty of the situation.

I think a better word for him to have used would have been "relieved." I'm certainly hoping, for the kids sake, that's what he meant.

 

[OceanAnnie]

I'll never agree that because of the way your spouse treats you, it gives you the right to have an affair. -What it does give you a right to do is to end the relationship, if working on it isn't an option, or isn't working. 2 wrongs don't make a right.

I was going to write the same thing. Two wrongs don't make a right. I don't think he should get a pass on his behavior because of the way he was treated. There were more responsible things he could've done.

 

[MarksMom2006]

I just went over to their website and read their family story. How they fell in love at first sight, how they had the kids. Everything in that story was for their family. It wasn't for either one of them, but for the Gosselins as a whole. Honestly, it did bring a tear to my eye. Maybe they need to go back and read it themselves.

 

[Buckalew11]

Well, I agree, affairs do happen. An affair does not necessarily have to cause a marriage to end. I would think long and hard before I ended my marriage if an affair was happening. It would depend on a lot of things...but once the DH checks out and moves on emotionally than no amount of change can even happen--because he does not care anymore. over it. goodbye. IF they choose to work on it, the end result may be very different.

Anytime someone says 'boy will be boys", "guys will be guys", or "men will be men" it'll get the thumbs down from me. I think it is a sick mindset and not a good message to send to males of any age. Of course, for a woman, do not blame your hormones for all your actions either. It goes both ways with me. Use some self control, everyone!

 

[joviroxx]

I think a better word for him to have used would have been "relieved." I'm certainly hoping, for the kids sake, that's what he meant.

Well, he doesnt seem to be the best public speaker, that's for sure...

 

[Epcot luvr]

I was going to write the same thing. Two wrongs don't make a right. I don't think he should get a pass on his behavior because of the way he was treated. There were more responsible things he could've done.

I love how Kate's relationship with Steve just gets a white wash, how about her having an affair. So she treats her husband like crap and then sleeps with another man, her 2 wrongs make a what then. She took a lovely 11 day vacation with the man many people believe is her lover. Has spent how many nights in hotels and restaurants with another man, we can't judge Kate though. Just Jon, ooh bad Jon.

 

[LoraJ]

I love how Kate's relationship with Steve just gets a white wash, how about her having an affair. So she treats her husband like crap and then sleeps with another man, her 2 wrongs make a what then. She took a lovely 11 day vacation with the man many people believe is her lover. Has spent how many nights in hotels and restaurants with another man, we can't judge Kate though. Just Jon, ooh bad Jon.

Where is your proof that she is having an affair with him?

 

[Gabes_mommy]

I love how Kate's relationship with Steve just gets a white wash, how about her having an affair. So she treats her husband like crap and then sleeps with another man, her 2 wrongs make a what then. She took a lovely 11 day vacation with the man many people believe is her lover. Has spent how many nights in hotels and restaurants with another man, we can't judge Kate though. Just Jon, ooh bad Jon.

There is no proof the alleged affair, only accusations made by......Jon. I have always believed that Jon only came out with accusations about Kate's affair to excuse his own infidelity.

If any proof of Kate having an affair surfaces I am sure a lot of people's opinions of Kate will change dramatically.

 

[joviroxx]

Where is your proof that she is having an affair with him?

Well, truthfully, its apparent (by the looks of this thread) that proof isnt really necessary to form opinions, accuse jon or kate , assign guilt or assume motivations or reasons...ya know? Speculation is the word