I've been lied to for six years...

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SandrA9810

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I've been lied to for six years of my life, believing every promise she's made to me. But now that's she's found a new BFF, that's gay, this other person is all of sudden better than me.

It would've been one thing to say "hey, our bedroom life sucks, I want some one different..." That I can agree with, it hasn't been great in the past few years, but that's because of certain choices that I made for her. One of the other promises I believed from her as well.
No, she has to tell me, "I'm sorry I've lied to you since the beginning hoping you would change. What you told me you wanted from life is nothing I want, and I figured I could change your mind after awhile."

The worst part of it all... I was up on my high white horse with my night... it was rough, it was hard having a relationship 3,000 miles apart with a border in between. I had it all, I had everything I wanted with a person that honestly wanted the same.
I was the one that fumbled and fell off, and it would've been rough but I could've gotten back on, instead I listened to her, believed her, and took the easy way out. And now I get to find out that I've been living in a lie for 6 years and now I have nothing to show for it, except for now she gets to be off galavanting around with her new girlfriend that she's so passionately in love with (who is also barely of legal age and 8 years younger).

Merry Christmas to myself.
 
I'm sorry to hear about that. I hope your Christmas still has a little magic left. Look forward to the new year and hopefully something good will come to you during it. :hug:
 
I've been lied to for six years of my life, believing every promise she's made to me. But now that's she's found a new BFF, that's gay, this other person is all of sudden better than me.

It would've been one thing to say "hey, our bedroom life sucks, I want some one different..." That I can agree with, it hasn't been great in the past few years, but that's because of certain choices that I made for her. One of the other promises I believed from her as well.
No, she has to tell me, "I'm sorry I've lied to you since the beginning hoping you would change. What you told me you wanted from life is nothing I want, and I figured I could change your mind after awhile."

The worst part of it all... I was up on my high white horse with my night... it was rough, it was hard having a relationship 3,000 miles apart with a border in between. I had it all, I had everything I wanted with a person that honestly wanted the same.
I was the one that fumbled and fell off, and it would've been rough but I could've gotten back on, instead I listened to her, believed her, and took the easy way out. And now I get to find out that I've been living in a lie for 6 years and now I have nothing to show for it, except for now she gets to be off galavanting around with her new girlfriend that she's so passionately in love with (who is also barely of legal age and 8 years younger).

Merry Christmas to myself.

:hug:

I have read lots of your threads. Doesn't she completely support you? Maybe she was tired of doing so.
So what do you do now?
 

That is a harsh and unkind thing to say, and to come to a new place to say it.

I don't understand why you couldn't have just not replied if you had nothing kind to say to a hurting person?
 
Dear OP,
I have not read any of your posts prior to this one, so I don't know any history on your now defunct relationship. I will say that I find it rather rude that many people have taken the posted information on your misfortune as an opportunity to attempt to drag you down even further.

I know that I don't post every single detail and nuance of my relationship online, so I can't image that others do either. Without the whole picture it's really difficult for anyone online or IRL to be able to offer "constructive" criticism or even ask the right "probing" questions in order to offer help. So with this in mind, I can only offer you the following.

I am sorry that your life plan has gotten off track. I am sorry that you are having to deal with this stuff at the holidays. :hug:
 
Dear OP,
I have not read any of your posts prior to this one, so I don't know any history on your now defunct relationship. I will say that I find it rather rude that many people have taken the posted information on your misfortune as an opportunity to attempt to drag you down even further.

I know that I don't post every single detail and nuance of my relationship online, so I can't image that others do either. Without the whole picture it's really difficult for anyone online or IRL to be able to offer "constructive" criticism or even ask the right "probing" questions in order to offer help. So with this in mind, I can only offer you the following.

I am sorry that your life plan has gotten off track. I am sorry that you are having to deal with this stuff at the holidays. :hug:


Cosign. Maggie said it perfectly. Don't let anonymous strangers on a message board bring you down. I hope you find happiness.
 
I don't even know what the other person said... I didn't realize I had a following of people on my life for them to come over here. Any one is free to go through my posts... they are all true, or else I wouldn't have said it.

There's things that I need to wrap up in my life now, then work on the things I feel I left open from the past. Then just go from there. Who knows what exactly will happen, but as long as I can close the past, then I will have accomplished everything.
 
Sandra- so where do you go from here? Are you still living with Kari? Looking for a job? You're a pretty frequent and unique poster so some of us are kinda shocked by the news of your break up. Of course I don't want to ask for details that you don't feel up to giving, but I will admit to curoisity on practical- not emotional- next steps for you?
:hug:
 
Right now, the only thing I can imagine doing is flying to the middle of no where canada to lay down in the snow to watch the northern lights, drinking a smirnoff or strawberry daquire... at least alcohol doesn't freeze in the -40 degree or colder nights.

I honestly have no idea where I'm going to go. I don't get along well with my family, and I know my aunt would greatly appreciate my help with my g'mother, we just butt heads on practically everything. And I hate Texas (sorry if any one lives there). So 2-3 weeks is like max amount of time allowable. They also don't know about our relationship, so it would be farely akward to say "kari kicked me out".
I need to stick around till after the new year, I'm on Kari's insurance and there's a few things I'd like to do before I get dropped.
There's still no job on the horizon, I started applying for part time work instead of looking for full time, since that didn't work. I figured if I made enough to cover the rent, it would help things out. Of course part time won't cut it now.
I stare at all the things we've gotten together over the years, I really don't know where to start on mine and hers, and truthfully I don't care to have any of it. Maybe a couple pictures and my teddy bear. The only things that I know are mine is what I brought into the relationship, which I don't really care to have either.
She hasn't talked any of the finances. I know she's been taking care of it all for the past year, but it was more of we're in this together. I don't know if there's even a dividing point of my share of debt. Although I'm sure once I'm out of the picture, her parent's will pay it off, give her the money to go back to college, and tell her to suck it up as lessoned learned. The only thing in my name is a 1,500$ in a 401k, and if she kept me on the insurance, I think there's like a 15,000$ life insurance policy on me.

I don't really care about hiding the details of my life on the net... you can ask anything.
 
Hopefully your holiday present to yourself will be that you'll realize it's for the best. :hug: Sometimes a late present is better than no present.
 

This emoticon is inappropriate to this thread. If you have nothing compassionate to share with the OP, then at least have the decency to not post anything.

SandrA9810, it sure sounds like you have a tough few weeks, if not months ahead of you. :hug:

Hoping for you that you are able to find a job, and move on with your life.
 
She hasn't talked any of the finances. I know she's been taking care of it all for the past year, but it was more of we're in this together. I don't know if there's even a dividing point of my share of debt.

Although I'm sure once I'm out of the picture, her parent's will pay it off, give her the money to go back to college, and tell her to suck it up as lessoned learned.
.

I remember you posting about taking your whole family to WDW and having to stay an extra night because of your handicapped brother-all on her credit card.

I can't imagine expecting her parents to pay off debt that is half yours?


As far as trying to quickly get some medical things done while you are still on her insurance. remember , anything that isn't covered will be up to HER to pay off. is that really fair?:confused3
 
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