Is this normal for a daycare to do? Not happy!!!

[Jenvenza]

Good grief! What a blessing you found out ahead of time. I'd be irritated too. Geez, I'm surprised she said that.

I used to work at a private preschool/daycare. Let me tell you, there are all kinds of little kids who come. Why this genius thought your daughter would be an issue is beyond me. While at this daycare, I'd have kids who I'd literally have to peel off of their parents and kids who came skipping in with smiles. A good daycare should be able to handle both. So I'm confused why this woman would not be able to handle a 2.5 year old who's never been to daycare.

Definitely ask around. I'm sure your friends will be more than happy to help you out. I agree with previous posters too that asking a SAHM might work even better for you. Trust your instincts and go with your gut. It's an emotional decision, you're trusting someone else to care for your child. Being thorough (like you are already) makes perfect sense. Good luck finding someone for your little girl! She's an absolute cutie from the pics in your signature!

Thank you! This was my thinking as well! I really thought a good daycare could handle and probably DOES handle both kinds of children. It really is an emotional thing for me and it is not easy. But I am glad I found out about this woman before we actually did decide to enroll her there!

And thanks about my DD - we think she is a cutie too!

 

[kpm76]

Wow, that's terrible! Much better to know now though than to have to transtition your DD again. I feel for you though. My DD is 2.5 as well and she was in daycare for 3 weeks before we decided it was not working for us and I quit my job to stay home. Now, we are looking at enrolling her in a preschool program a few mornings/week in September. I found that dropping in unannounced works best. I want to see what the place is like without advaced notice of a visit. It's a really hard decision though.

This might be far fetched, but I know where I live the word "daycare" is taboo and most people refer to childcare situations as "school" even if the child is only 6 weeks old. I wonder if it's possible that the woman was offended by your use of the term daycare, especially since you said they only take kids atarting at 18 months. Typically that is a different license so they may actually be known as a preschool. Who knows but in any case, the woman was rude and glad your DD will not be going to that place. I am sure she will transition just fine. Though I am home with DD, we have a schedule that we follow each day which includes gymnastics, art classes, playdates, library story hour etc so she has plenty of interaction with kids her age and I have never found an issue with sharing etc. Good luck

 

[3prettyprincesses]

Thank you! This was my thinking as well! I really thought a good daycare could handle and probably DOES handle both kinds of children. It really is an emotional thing for me and it is not easy. But I am glad I found out about this woman before we actually did decide to enroll her there!

And thanks about my DD - we think she is a cutie too!

No problem! And seriously consider this a blessing in disguise. Imagine if you had enrolled your little girl here and she's clingy because she misses her mom (totally normal of course! ). Who knows how this place would've handled her. Really, this lady did you a favor! You didn't even have to waste your time by going on the tour!

 

[puffkin]

I dont think daycare is bad at all. I think a lot of people get that vibe from me that I do though. It just hasnt been for us so far. And I loved that we could keep her at home all this time. I think this will be harder on me than on her actually. And while I do understand that the transition is hard - what else are parents like me - who have all of a sudden been thrown into this situation - supposed to do if daycares dont like taking children who have never been before? I want to feel confident about this decision -considering I have no other choice right now - and now I will be worried about messing up everyone else's schedule at the daycare and that my child will be the reason, when that isnt her fault.

Ok, this is just a thought. But since she hasn't been in ANY type of daycare situations before, if you have a friend/home daycare to start her in now it MIGHT work better. She will still be transitioning, but not to a full blown school setting. The provider will probably also have more time to help her adjust than a center probably would. I would definitely look for someone who has some structure though and doesn't just plop them in front of a TV.

I would then transition her to a daycare center in the fall at the start of the school year. Lots of kids start daycare then, move up in class, come back from the summer off, etc so lots of others will be in the same boat. She will probably have a much easier time adapting then AND she will be somewhat used to at least the "idea" of it.

My DS was in FT homecare until 2 1/2. His homecare was very structured and school like (except she wasn't crafty so they didn't do crafts much, but she was great otherwise). He transitioned so easily to the center when she unexpectedly shut down. Literally in a day. I remember picking him up and the teachers couldn't believe how well he did, they were shocked. I though was COMPLETELY shocked by how self sufficient and independent the kids were. Examples- changed themselves if accidents, cleaned up all toys, served themselves family style (drinks included), put coats on themselves, etc. He picked it up very quickly but I just never thought a 2 year old could be so self sufficient.

Anyway, I was just thinking maybe doing something like above would help ease your and your daughters transition. I agree it will probably be more difficult on you than her. I really hope this helps even a little, and i apologize if I offended you in any way with my other post.

 

[Jenvenza]

Ok, this is just a thought. But since she hasn't been in ANY type of daycare situations before, if you have a friend/home daycare to start her in now it MIGHT work better. She will still be transitioning, but not to a full blown school setting. The provider will probably also have more time to help her adjust than a center probably would. I would definitely look for someone who has some structure though and doesn't just plop them in front of a TV.

I would then transition her to a daycare center in the fall at the start of the school year. Lots of kids start daycare then, move up in class, come back from the summer off, etc so lots of others will be in the same boat. She will probably have a much easier time adapting then AND she will be somewhat used to at least the "idea" of it.

My DS was in FT homecare until 2 1/2. His homecare was very structured and school like (except she wasn't crafty so they didn't do crafts much, but she was great otherwise). He transitioned so easily to the center when she unexpectedly shut down. Literally in a day. I remember picking him up and the teachers couldn't believe how well he did, they were shocked. I though was COMPLETELY shocked by how self sufficient and independent the kids were. Examples- changed themselves if accidents, cleaned up all toys, served themselves family style (drinks included), put coats on themselves, etc. He picked it up very quickly but I just never thought a 2 year old could be so self sufficient.

Anyway, I was just thinking maybe doing something like above would help ease your and your daughters transition. I agree it will probably be more difficult on you than her. I really hope this helps even a little, and i apologize if I offended you in any way with my other post.

You didnt offend me at all. I am just very emotional and sad about this - I know that sounds crazy! But I think that is a good idea you have. And it might work out better that way.

 

[Briarmom]

The daycare has been in business 45 years - it is likely not the same director or owner at this point.

It could be a family run business through the years...any number of things.

Liz

Ah. Sorry. The way I read it, it sounded like the lady had been a daycare provider for 45 years.

 

[kerrynic78]

I just want to wish you good luck! My DD was 2 when my ex and I got divorced. My DD and I moved from FL to CT and I had to put her in daycare when we moved up here, around the time she was 2 1/2. I had been a stay at home mom and with my DD 24/7 so to say I was nervous was an understatement!

Well she has been there for 6 months and is doing amazing! She loves all of her friends at "school", all of her teachers, and does so much more during the day than we ever did when I stayed home with her (being creative wasn't my strong point!) I really thought it was going to be a nightmare and cried a lot in the beginnning but she loves it and I am sure your DD will as well!

 

[Jenvenza]

I just want to wish you good luck! My DD was 2 when my ex and I got divorced. My DD and I moved from FL to CT and I had to put her in daycare when we moved up here, around the time she was 2 1/2. I had been a stay at home mom and with my DD 24/7 so to say I was nervous was an understatement!

Well she has been there for 6 months and is doing amazing! She loves all of her friends at "school", all of her teachers, and does so much more during the day than we ever did when I stayed home with her (being creative wasn't my strong point!) I really thought it was going to be a nightmare and cried a lot in the beginnning but she loves it and I am sure your DD will as well!

This is really great to read! I am so glad that she loves it and is doing so well! I hope my DD will do the same. This gives me hope!