Inspired by wedding dress thread/how much for a wedding

[Tiggeroo]

DH and I have recently begun thinking about this cost. We have a 19yo dd with a serious boyfriend. They are nowhere near marriage but I want to know what to expect. We are not rich and it will not, if we foot the bill, be fancy. DH and I paid for ours and it was very inexpensive but we had a good time. We rented a hall and purchased the food from a catering company. Relatives set it up and it was buffett style. We would like to do a bit nicer for our dd, since we have only one girl.
What did you spend on yours. What are some big $$$ stories you have heard.

 

[mtemm]

I would suggest doing what my parents did. They didn't pay for my wedding, but they gave me a set amount. Can't remember if it was $3k or $5k now, but it helped tremendously. We never had any of the issues that friends whose parents paid for the wedding totally had. We chose what we wanted, what was important to us.

Our wedding not including honeymoon cost about $11k I'd say. That was almost 6 years ago.

 

[ead79]

Being a bride-to-be myself, I hope I can help with some figures I have discovered while wedding planning. The national average price for a wedding is $19,900. In major cities (like NYC and LA especially), the cost can easily be double that on average. Now don't panic--you can definitely have a nice wedding for less than that. Here are the main money saving tips you can use:

1) Don't invite tons and tons of people
2) Have a small cake and punch reception (or perhaps with just light appetizers)
3) Don't have a wedding at a meal time (afternoon weddings can serve much less food)
4) Decide what priorities your daughter wants to focus on. Spend a decent amount on those parts (maybe floral, photography??), then spend less on the other parts.
5) Make a budget and stick to it

My parents gave us a very generous amount, then they said that's it. My fiance and I have chosen to add some money of our own to my parents generous gift so we can have some extra things that are special to us. If you want to know the projected cost of my wedding, PM me and I'll be happy to share it with you.

 

[jamsmom]

This may not be popular, but for me to get the type of dress I really wanted, I rented my wedding gown.

 

[KJo719]

I'm getting married next month and I can't believe how expensive everything is. It seems like people hear wedding and the prices go up! Our parents are taking care of the reception and we are paying for everything else- photographer, flowers, invitations, etc. Many places will have a cheaper rate for Fri. night or Sun. weddings or for weddings during the not as popular wedding months. Prices also depend a lot on where you live. They vary tremendously in different parts of the country. Unfortunately, I live in an area that is quite expensive- at least $90 per person for the reception and that's some of the lower priced places! It's good that you're starting to think of it now, this way you can come up with a plan!

 

[4greatboys]

I spent $350 on my first in 1984 and spent $500 on mine in 1999.
I really loved a dress that was $2500 but no wat was I paying that kind of money.
O dotn see how people can spend $19,000 or more on a wedding. Dh and I paid for our wedding in 1999. We had a wonderful wedding at a church and had the reception there. And we spent about $5000--maybe a tad more. We had a buffet dinner with a caterer. I found a really great one reasonably priced.

 

[catsrule]

Our wedding cost around $35.00, the price of the preacher, that was it.

 

[Fire14]

Our wedding cost us 2000.00 Total.
I found dress of my dreams on clearence rack, We had sheet cake in back and only a small Decorative cake to cut.

We got married on a Friday afternoon. Only invited people we really wanted there to wedding. Had a buffet recp. with Deli sand and soup. I made invites on computer but did get fancy wedding announcements and thank you cards. Did a bit of creative dress planning to get Groom and groomsmen in tuxes.

Got married by Dh's friend's Father. I'm not a BIG flower lover so I did very little in area of flowers. Had friend decorate with balloons as her gift to us.

 

[mum4jenn]

We only spent around $1000 TOTAL!! This was in 1988 but we had a sweet nice wedding and people still tell my Mom that my wedding was the nicest they had ever been to.

My dress was out of JCPenney catalog fro $135.
We were married in December and the church was heavily decorated with Poinsettias so we did not need ANY decorations. The church had a kneeling bench and candelabra for brides to use at no charge.
The reception was at the house we had recently purchased(Church was booked or it would have been there)
I ordered mints in our colors out of one of the mail order catalogs
I used queen sized flat sheets and table runners for the table coverings.
I found candles in our wedding colors an clearance and decorated with coordinating ribbon
We had a small cake(with plenty left over) punch,nuts,mints,wedding cookies,and at the last minute we bought a large deli tray.
The photographer worked with us and only took pictures of the things I wanted and had them printed without proofs and retouching.

 

[DonnaS]

We ended up using a wedding consultant. She helped us get a much nicer wedding for our money than we would have otherwise. I paid for it all myself since my parents had passed away. Some people think that consultants are just for fancy, fancy weddings. She had recommended vendors for budget, moderate, and high priced weddings. We ended up in the moderate level. We still got to chose each vendor; using a coordinator just helped us narrow down the choices a lot.

 

[snoopy]

My parents spent $14,000 on my wedding back in 1986.

Its a tradition in my Italian family to have very large, very elaborate weddings. Had we been paying for it, you can be sure it would have been scaled way down. There were 250 guests at my wedding, if I were to do it today, I'd never have that many people there.

My sister recently got married, and we chipped in to help her pay for it. Her wedding was really nice, very elegant, and it cost about $12,000 - which included her dress, the flowers, open bar (champagne, wine & beer only), a sit down dinner, a DJ and photographer, and 100 guests.

 

[scarlett873]

my first wedding was probably no more than about $3000, including the honeymoon...we did a lot of the food ourselves and traded an old computer for the services of a coordinator...she did the decorations and our cake for a very old computer...the biggest expense for the wedding was my dress...$600...

my second wedding was done for a total of about $2000, again, including the honeymoon. we "ran away" to WDW to get married. we couldn't afford the cost for an intimate wedding so we found a nice wedding chapel on Hwy 192 and had our own very intimate wedding...just DH and me! then we stayed at the ASMu for about 6 nights and played away there at WDW! it was exactly what we wanted...no one to tell us how much to spend, who to invite, and everything else that goes along with planning a wedding! my dress was made by my mother and cost no more than about $50.

now my sister on the other hand...she's getting married one week from saturday. they got engaged in august of 2001 and set a budget of $10,000. they surpassed that last year!!! i'm sure this wedding is costing upwards $15,000 altogether...

looking back, i would rather have a small intimate wedding and use the money that would have gone to a big expensive ceremony and reception for a fabulous honeymoon or towards a house...

 

[beachbunny]

As I help my baby sister plan her wedding, I'm trying to recall what I spent for mine in 1993. I believe this was the breakdown:

Dress: $2000
Food/Drink: $25,000 ($100 per person)
Cake: $1000
Flowers: $1000
Photographer: $5000
Band: $1000
Misc.: $1000 (tux rentals, groomsmen's gifts/bridesmaid's gifts)
Rehearsal Dinner: $2000

Grand Total: $38,000
Both sets of parents chipped in some and we paid the rest. I can only hope my sister is more frugal than me.

You can guess what it cost us to honeymoon at WDW.

 

[monalsw]

wow, things have sure changed!

my first wedding, in 1980, cost $500, lol! dress from jcpenney's, cake from local 'wedding cake lady' for $35, then hubby's family and friends played the music and family church donated and served meal of ham, potato salad, etc. mail-oder invitations were cheap too, can't remember how much. no booze, grandma was into silk floral arranging at the time, photographer was probably the most expensive thing, at $125. and all for a marriage that didn't last, lol!

second wedding, in 1997, cost $750. i made dresses for myself and then 8yr old dd, bought dh a new shirt and tie, paid $25 to 'rent' amphitheatre and picnic shelter at city park (included shuffleboard, bocci, etc), printed invitations on computer, and had local market cater picnic style lunch of deli trays, baked bean, veggies, etc. decorated the shelter with terra cotta pots of impatiens and ribbon and greenery, along with silk flowers/bows left over from sisters first wedding (yeah, grandma made these too). b-i-l does wedding photography, we bought the film and had it developed. one friend, who happened to be taking cake decorating classes at local craft store, baked and decorated cake as gift. ceremony performed by my ex's father (not the first hubby, but the 12 yr relationship/joke between hubbies, lol) people still comment on how nice our wedding was.

doesn't take much to please me...however, dd won't be as easy. dh and i are planning to refinance the house when she gets married! seriously, even with my sometimes frugal and simple ideas, i know that she'll have much more of a wedding someday.

best wishes to all of the brides-to-be!

 

[Mishetta]

I wouldn't be able to break down the cost of everything but our wedding cost in the neighborhood of $10,000. I think the family style sit down dinner cost about $35 per person & that included the bar. It was a very elegant wedding too. My 2 cousins gave me a "sweet table" as a wedding present with tons & tons of gourmet desserts, a variety of 42 different types. They also had an ice carving of a bride & groom & did all sorts of table decorating with toule & tiny white lights nestled within. It looked like a fantasyland setting.

I think a lot of the cost of a wedding depends on what part of the country you're in. Again, as another poster mentioned, NY or LA are probably the most expensive. (I lived in L.A. & we had our wedding in MI, where my family lives, because the prices in Los Angeles are ridiculous!)

BTW, the $10,000 does not include the honeymoon or all the "extra" photo's we ordered from the photographer. We also had video taping done & that is something I would recommend to everyone. It's been 9 years & we still watch the tape & say that it's our favorite movie!

Good luck!

 

[mrsv98]

Ours was about $7000 total. Now, about $2000 was my dress, more expensive than I wanted, but the salon kind of hit me with $500 in alterations at the end. DH bought an expensive suit, but he hadn't bought one in ages and he still wears it for work. We had a luncheon with finger sandwiches, salads and some passed "horsey douvers" as my Dad calls them! I found a local independent caterer to do the lunch, she also made the cake and helped me get a deal on the invites. I had a small local florist and did the favors myself. DH's dad paid for the reception. A big money saver was avoiding a bar. There have been some *ahem* unfortunate incidents with alcohol on both sides of our family, so we decided to avoid it altogether. We had cds on a stereo for music at the reception and a harpist at the wedding, also a friend of mine sang. So basically, we had a mix and we compromised a lot. Not the bigger wedding I dreamed of but not the justice of the peace DH would have liked! All in all a good lesson to start a marriage, you can't always have what you want, but you get what you need!

 

[LuvTigger]

Many of my friends have gotten married in the last 5 years (one got married almost 8 years ago), and most of them spent between $10,000-$15,000. One of my friends got married just a couple weeks ago, and I didn't ask her how much she spent, but it was much more intimate, yet elegant in a simple-sort of way. I doubt she spent more than $7,000 at most.

When my time comes, I keep telling everyone I'm going to elope. I'm kind of like everyone's "wedding planner" and I've seen all the things they have to go thru, and I think most people focus way too much on the wedding and not enough on the marriage!

 

[Tiggeroo]

If I know my dd it will be intimate yet elegant. If there is no wedding til she gets out of college and maybe out a year we will be able to offer approx $7000. The couple can do what they wish. Put it to a wedding or towards a home. My family has really dwindled over the years. She would have a hard time getting 30 people who will still be alive then. This is sort of sad. When we were kids you couldn't have a first birthday party or a christening without renting a hall. For my dd's hs graduation including friends there were 50 people in our back yard. Dh feels strongly about a sit down meal or at least a buffet in a nice hall. DD has always said that she wants a vintage style wedding gown, or if possible something rennaissance looking.
What happens when the grooms family has many many more people who they need to invite then the bride's family?

 

[CourtasanSatine]

DBF and I are nowhere near marriage yet but the idea worries my family in terms of the money.I'm the first born daughter so I understand and good luck to the soon to be brides

 

[zurgswife]

Let's see we were married in 1989. My husbands community where we got married lots of volunteer help.

Dress: $2500 (worn by sister 2 years later)
Food/Drink: $1,200 (250+ ppl)
Cake: $250
Flowers: $250 (ladies in the community made 20 aisle bouquets, my flowers, bridesmaids flowers, Alter flowers I only paid cost of flowers at wholesale prices)
Photographer: None
Band: $800
Tux purchase: $200 (has worn it about once a year since)
Misc.: $400 (groomsmen's gifts/bridesmaid's gifts)
Rehearsal Dinner: $200 (50ppl, mexican fiesta at my friends house)

Grand Total: $5,800


My sister got married 2 years later and spent about $12,000 and she wore the same dress that I had purchased for my wedding....